Heather London: The Hardest Part

The bus lurched forward as my body shook with the sobs escaping me. Deep down, I knew this time was different. This time I really was going to get away.

An older woman sitting in the seat in front of me turned around, and I quickly wiped away my tears. The last thing I wanted to do was draw any attention to myself, more than I already had. She gave me a sympathetic smile, glanced up at my bruised cheek, and then turned back around. I sank down farther in my seat, trying to disappear, wondering if I could really do this—if I could really be on my own and start a new life.

Twenty minutes later, we pulled up to the main station. The bus came to a stop, and I found myself glued to the seat, unable to move. I just knew Jake was out there, waiting for me. The last time I’d tried to run, he told me that no matter where I went, he would always find me and he would kill me if I ever tried to leave him again. I closed my eyes and his face came into view, his dark eyes staring at me, giving me the look of disapproval I knew so well.

The bus driver's voice came over the intercom, startling me out of my daze. A shiver rippled through me as I opened my eyes.

"I'm sorry, miss, but you’re going to have to get off here. You can go inside the station and check the schedule for the next bus."

I glanced around, finding the bus empty. Still clutching the duffel bag and envelope like my life depended on them, I stood up and made my way off the bus and into the station.

The building was empty except for an older man sitting on a bench next to the ticket counter. Bright fluorescent lights shined above me and an older lady sat behind a glass window, staring at me as I approached the counter.

"How can I help you?" the woman asked. I stood there, completely silent, completely terrified, and completely confused. How could she help me?

"I need a ticket," I mumbled.

"Okay, where are you going?"

I swallowed hard, panic filling me. Where was I going? Where could I blend in and disappear? Where did I want to start my new life? Where could I live and keep my promise to Mike? Where could I wake up and smile every day?

"Miss, are you all right?" the lady asked, looking at me with wary eyes.

"When is the next bus out of town?" My voice shook. The fear I'd been trying to keep contained crept its way up my throat, causing my mouth to go dry.

"Well, let's see here." She turned to her computer and scanned the screen. "Looks like there's a bus coming in from Los Angeles in about twenty minutes. It will fuel up and then head back to L.A."

Los Angeles was too close. Jake did a lot of business there. He was there now. I needed something farther away. A lot farther.

"Um, how about something east, like…" My voice drifted and she stared at me while I hesitated. “New York?" It sounded more like I was asking for permission. That was a habit that I would have to try and break.

She raised her eyebrow and cocked her head. "You have any idea how long that trip will take?"

I shook my head. "No."

"At least a few days, and it will have a lot of stops. It's an exhausting ride."

It couldn't be as exhausting as the last couple years of my life. Just knowing that every day I would be getting farther and farther away from here, away from him, it sounded like Heaven to me.

"I'll take a ticket to New York, please." I tried my best to keep my voice from shaking. My mother always wanted to go to New York. She always wanted to be a Broadway singer but never made it off the stages in Vegas.

The woman continued to stare at me like she was waiting for me to change my mind. Finally, she sighed and turned back to her computer. "Okay, if that's what you want."

I glanced around the empty station, still waiting for Jake or one of his men to burst through the front door and drag me back to the misery I was trying to get away from.

"You'll be on the next bus heading to Cedar City, UT. Should be here in an hour. From there, you'll catch the next bus on the schedule," she said, bringing my attention back to her. She pushed a piece of paper through the small opening in the glass, and I grabbed it. "That is the schedule to New York. Like I said, you'll be making a lot of stops over the next few days. That'll be three hundred sixty dollars."

I made a slow turn away from the ticket window and opened the envelope. Large bundles of bills were piled on top of one another. My eyes grew wide. I'd never seen so much money before. Swallowing hard, I pulled out four one hundred-dollar bills from the envelope and slid them under the window.

"Miss, is everything okay? Do you need me to call someone, maybe the police?" she asked, narrowing her eyes on me.

"No, no police. Everything’s fine." I looked her dead in the eyes when I answered her. I wanted her to believe me.

It seemed logical to call the police if I were in trouble. And it would be if the man I was running from didn't have most of the department on his payroll. Jake had so many connections that it was hard to trust anyone… anyone except for Mike. The Terrell family had a reputation in Vegas. You didn't mess with them unless you had a death wish. If they asked for something, you obliged, no questions asked.

The lady handed me a ticket and then I took a seat in the corner of the station, near the window. My body felt heavy, tired. I glanced down at my watch. Three thirty a.m. It was only an hour ago that Mike had woken me up. One hour of being on the run and I was already exhausted. You can do this , I told myself. Just one more hour. One more hour and you’ll be out of this place. One more hour and you’ll be on a bus where no one knows who you are, where you've been, or what you’ve been through. I repeated the words one more hour a few more times in my head.

I had been only twenty-one years old when I fell in love with Jake. Back then, he was charming, sweet, and good-looking. I felt like the luckiest girl alive. It wasn't until his father passed away and he inherited his empire of casinos, wealth, and power that he began to change. It wasn't a sudden change. The change was slow over time and only got really bad after my mother died a couple years ago. That was when he knew he was all I had left in this world. I guessed he felt like he could treat me however he wanted, thinking I would never leave him. Truth be told, he wasn't too far off. I had nowhere else to go.

The next hour went by slowly. My eyes never left the front doors. I was still waiting and expecting Jake to come through them, looking for me. He always seemed to know where I was, like he had eyes and ears everywhere. It just didn't seem possible that I was getting away this easy.

I heard a low rumble of an engine and then saw a bus pull up outside the station. Bus 571 - Cedar City, UT, was posted on the front of it. Only a few more minutes until I would be out of this place. A few more minutes and I would be on a bus heading as far away from here as I could get.

The bus was mostly empty except a few people in the front rows. I made my way to the back, hoping to stretch my legs out and get some sleep. I placed my bag under the seat but kept hold of the envelope, knowing it held my new life.

Letting out a long, deep breath, I rested my back against the window and stretched my legs out on the empty seat next to me. The envelope sat on my lap. I stared at it for a long moment before finding the courage to open it. I sifted around the money, pulling out a social security card and passport. The name Emily Anderson was on the documents, along with my picture—my first name had remained the same. A tiny smile appeared on my lips, knowing I would still be somewhat me. Mike knew that name held special meaning to me. It was my mother's middle name, and he knew I would never want to part with it.