Lyra Parish - Weak Without Him

"I won't be here long. Just need to take care of some things, and I left my laptop."

She smiled, and the elevator door opened. I walked to my office and pulled out Jennifer's file. A picture of her smiled back at me, and I ran my finger across her face. Why had I never taken any pictures of her? Or taken her to do fun things in New York or California? When I found her, things would change. A person never knows what they have until it was gone. Regret overtook me.

I flipped through her folder, trying to find a clue, something hidden that she didn't tell me. I knew her parents had died, but never mentioned it because I wanted her to openly talk about it when she was ready. After scanning through the pages, I slammed the folder shut, then tried to call Luke again. No answer.

I opened the laptop and sorted through emails. Jesse's job was currently unfilled, and I needed to get someone in there as soon as possible. A list of women applied, but only one caught my eye: Lori. She would be great at managing the Girls and making sure everything was in place for conventions and meetings. Plus, I got along with her fine. I picked up the phone and called Paisley.

"Have Lori meet me in my office in the next thirty minutes, and join her please."

"I didn't know you were here today. I thought you would be in London for another week."

"Had a change of plans." I hung up the phone, then walked to the window that overlooked the city and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Where are you, Jenn?" I whispered to the streets.

I looked over at the wall where I first touched her, and that hole inside of me spread, making me feel more empty. I balled my fist and punched the wall several times. My knuckles bled, but the pain helped me feel alive and regain myself. Two knocks on the door brought me back to reality.

"Come in," I said, and moved toward the edge of the desk.

When Lori saw me, the look on her face showed nothing but worry, then she glanced down at my swollen knuckles. I didn't hide them.

"Have a seat, please."

They both did.

"Thank you for appearing on such short notice. I know you applied for the management position, Lori, and I don’t want to go through the procedures, annoying interview questions, and all of that. It's a waste of my time, so I'd like to offer you the job. You're more than qualified, and I would be honored to work with you."

Her mouth dropped open and Paisley smiled.

"Are you serious?" Lori asked.

"Very."

"Yes. I would love to. I. I don't know what to say exactly. Thank you."

"The job will come with more responsibilities, a pay raise, and of course, you will not longer be on the line up. Congratulations."

"I am speechless. Thank you so much, Mr. Felton. I will not let you down."

"Paisley, please make sure to have her sign the release paperwork and transition her this week. Also, please let her Number One know as well. You'll move into Jesse's office in the corner."

"I'll get right on it," Paisley said.

"Training will need to begin immediately," I said.

Lori stood to shake my hand, and I smiled. It was the best choice. She was trustworthy, listened to direction, and cared about her job.

Before they left the room, I called Lori back in.

"I'll meet you in my office whenever you've finished," Paisley turned and said to Lori.

Before she sat, she looked over me. "You look like shit, Mr. F."

"I know."

"You didn't find her, did you?"

I sucked in a deep breath then spoke. "I did. She was with Luke."

She held back a smile, and I shook my head.

"Then was kidnapped in front of me."

She covered her mouth with her hands and gasped. "Oh my God."

"And I'm searching for her. You haven't heard anything, have you?"

"No. She never returned my calls."

"She's here, in the states, somewhere. I know that. I have to find her."

"We will."

I congratulated her once again, and she was on her way.

"Take care of yourself," she said before she left my office.

I tightened my hand into a fist and grabbed the set of keys to the BMW I had in the parking garage for situations just like this. Having an extra car at the office was necessary.

Fucking Luke would talk to me one way or another. We had important matters to discuss, and I needed to find Jennifer before something terrible happened to her.

I sped through the city streets and drove straight to his house. His Volvo was parked outside. I used the spare key to his house and let myself in. His suitcase sat by the kitchen counter and mail was spread across the top. Music leaked from upstairs. I climbed them two at a time.

I slammed open the door to his studio where he was busy painting depressing shit.

"What the fuck?" I yelled at him.

He turned and stared at me like I had scared the shit out of him.

"What. The. Fuck. Luketon," I said again.

"What?"

"I've been calling you, asshole. Answer your phone."

He finished painting the dark clouds on the canvas and slammed his paintbrush into a jar of water.

"I've been working. Give me a break."

"I don't give a shit. When I call you, especially with the current circumstances, I need you to at least call me back in a timely manner. I've left you several voicemails. What is going on with you?"

"Leave, Finn. I can't be around you right now. I've got too much going on, and I really need to finish this project."

"No. Make me leave."

Luke looked down at my swollen knuckles and my flexing fist and shook his head. "You need rest. Go home. Shower. Shave. We can have dinner or something. You're acting fucking crazy. Leave." He stood inches from my face.

"You've not seen crazy yet," I said pushing him away from me. He didn't fight back, and I shook my head at him then slammed the studio door behind me. As I made my way down the stairs, he stood at the top and watched me.

"We can have dinner tonight," Luke said.

"I need to find Jennifer, Luke. I don't give a fuck about anything else." I stopped walking. "And she's somewhere in the US, not that you fucking cared to know."

He sucked in a deep breath and walked toward me.

"How do you know that for sure?"

"Because Abbot found the driver. And when I find out who took her, I will fucking kill them," I said as I slammed the door behind me. He didn't respond.

I slowly slipped away into the shadows. I knew once I fully lost myself there it would be hard to come back. But I hadn't completely given up hope yet.

I had a few favors to cash in from a few gangsters, thieves, and criminals that I hadn't talked to in years. Although I didn't particularly want to, it was time to give them a call.

Taxi driver and club guy entered and attached chains with cuffs to the hook in the corner of the room. I rolled over on the mattress and tried to pretend they weren't there, but their annoying fucking laughter became impossible to ignore.

"She has no clue what's in store for her, does she?" taxi driver said.

"No clue. Stupid bitch," the other one replied.

They stood over me, and I pretended they weren't there. I hoped they would walk away and leave me alone and, surprisingly, they did. But I didn't trust them. If Luke hadn't brought me here, they both would have probably had their way with me. After whispering back and forth to one another in the corner of the room, they left me to wallow in my emotionless bliss for hours before I was visited again.

The clearing of a throat woke me from my daze. I didn't roll over or acknowledge Luke, but pretended to be asleep to see how long he would stand there.

"Jennifer."

After a few minutes, I rolled over and looked at him and the tray of food in his hand.

"I've warned you," he said.

I slid off the bed then dropped to my knees and placed my arms behind my back. He left me there until my knees ached. Eventually, I would be numb to not only emotional pain but physical pain too. Once satisfied with me, Luke nodded his head with approval and set the tray of food, real food, on the table.