Sondrae Bennett - Chasing Paradise

“Couldn’t resist each other, huh? Must’ve made for one interesting night.” Laurie’s frank reply caused Gwen to blush. The rest of her family groaned.

“Laurie, are you setting out to embarrass all of our mates when they arrive?” Jason asked.

Laurie waved away his concern.

“The good news is, you all can get some revenge soon. Her mate is showing up next.” Danny wagged his eyebrows at Laurie across the table.

“Whoa, wait a minute, who said I’m next?”

“Well, Jason’s oldest, Ethan’s second oldest, and then comes you. Only logical to think you’d be the next in line.”

“Nope, it’ll skip me. Guess that means you’re next, Danny Boy, so don’t get too comfortable.” Their teasing reminded her of home and her romp, bringing a smile to her face. It reassured her as nothing else could have, even if all the mating talk was making her a bit uncomfortable. Glancing around the table, Gwen noticed Julie seemed as uncomfortable as she was, especially whenever Laurie mating was mentioned. Curious.

“What about you Alyssa? Are you hoping to follow Gwen and find a wolf mate?”

The conversation buzzed around her but Gwen focused on her plate. When the conversation moved on to safer topics, she breathed a sigh of relief. Talking about her relationship with Ethan left her feeling tense and strung out. Pretending they were a happily mated couple was especially hard around his family, whose happiness for them seemed so genuine. Every question, no matter how innocent, left her heart hurting.

After dinner, the women all retired to the living room while the men cleaned up the kitchen. Gwen watched Jason place a loving kiss on top of Samantha’s head. It was obvious throughout the evening how much the Premier doted on his mate. He had been attentive, and their love was a palpable thing in the room whenever he looked at her, adoration shining in his eyes.

She sighed wistfully. “It’s obvious to see how much Jason loves you, Samantha. You’re very lucky.”

Four sets of eyes turned on her. Alyssa’s held sympathy but the others were full of confusion.

“Yes, but you have Ethan,” Samantha responded frankly. Her shrewd gaze bore into Gwen, causing her to fidget in her seat.

“Well, yes…it’s just…different for us…” She stuttered to a stop. Somehow she’d managed to back herself into a corner. She couldn’t explain their problems to his family.

“How is it different?” Laurie asked. Her eyes were still warm but there was a sharp curiosity in them, and Gwen knew she’d have to say something. She also knew Ethan’s sisters wouldn’t hesitate to defend him if she wasn’t careful. The last thing she needed was to make enemies on her first night in her new home, and certainly not with her mate’s family. Trying to think fast, Gwen wondered what she could say to get out of this mess.

“Well, you know.” All of them continued to stare at her.

“Samantha, why don’t you tell us about your wedding. Gwen and I…” Alyssa started.

“Later.” Laurie cut in. Alyssa threw Gwen an apologetic look as her three sisters-in-law, or in-mating, turned their attention back on her. She fidgeted in her seat, knowing it was futile to try to escape their stares.

“I’m an otter, and you know how Ethan feels.” Gwen hoped her words would satisfy them, but the women shook their heads, making her elaborate. “He wanted a predator for a mate. He said he wouldn’t have chosen an otter.” Now the gazes held one thing, shock.

“Ethan would never say that. Gwen, you must have misunderstood.” The other females nodded, echoing the sentiment.

She shrugged uncomfortably. “Yeah, I guess.” Of course Ethan’s family would think only the best of him. She should never have said anything to begin with. Berating herself for letting her guard down, she reminded herself how dangerous opening up was, especially to wolves. Ethan had taught her that lesson but apparently not well enough. She needed to watch her words more carefully from now on.

Luckily, Alyssa filled the uncomfortable silence and helped steer the conversation to the upcoming wedding and Gwen found herself agreeing to be a bridesmaid.

It was easy to like Ethan’s family. They were warm and welcoming and didn’t seem to judge her on either her animal or her earlier misstep. Samantha had even mentioned the possibility of a “girls night out,” but Jason had popped his head into the living room from the kitchen and given Samantha a quelling glare. Gwen didn’t understand until Laurie told her about their last girls night. Something about drunken skinny-dipping in the town fountain.

Still, the stress of the evening and the attentive way Ethan acted, confusing Gwen more than she’d ever admit, was starting to wear on her. No one seemed to notice Gwen didn’t talk much as she retreated into her shell. At least she didn’t think anyone noticed.

Ethan watched Gwen surreptitiously rub her neck again. He had hoped seeing his family, having them give her a warm reception, would put her at ease. Instead, she seemed drained by the whole thing. He tried giving her his undivided attention and saw confusion enter her eyes again and again. Hopefully, he was getting through to her but he knew he had a long climb ahead of him to earn back her trust. It would take more than a night or two of attentiveness to prove his love. He just hoped he was putting a dent in the wall she’d built up.

It broke his heart to hear Gwen talk about mating him with such hurt in her voice. The men heard the whole painful conversation from the kitchen where Ethan and his brothers had been cleaning. The wistfulness as she talked about Jason’s love for Samantha made him physically ache. Whenever he’d imagined finding his mate, he’d thought he would sweep her off her feet. Instead he’d pushed her to the ground trying to run away. He was the biggest idiot in the world for not treating Gwen like the goddess she was from the very beginning. For the thousandth time, he wondered how to fix this. Looking over, Ethan saw both his brothers staring at him angrily.

“What’s going on with you two? She watches you like someone watches a coiled snake, and why does she think you don’t want an otter as a mate?”

With a sigh, Ethan rubbed his hands over his face. He had hoped to keep the full extent of his stupidity from his family. Not that he blamed Gwen for saying what she did. He knew it wasn’t done with malicious intent. She’d even left out the worst parts. It was still hard to believe he had hurt her as badly as he had.

Staring up into his brothers’ angry faces, he wondered once again how to fix things. Maybe it was best to tell his family. He needed all the help he could get. And he knew, after their anger abated–and he had no doubt there would be anger–his family would help him climb out of the mess he created and get back on track.

“I screwed up. I didn’t want a mate, and when I met Gwen, after I’d already slept with her, I denied she meant anything to me. I might’ve said something about wanting to mate a jaguar or a coyote in my denial. She happened to overhear the conversation and it’s caused a huge rift in our relationship. Nothing I say seems to penetrate her distrust.”

Both brothers started talking at once. They kept their voices down so the women wouldn’t hear, but their fury bled through their whispers.

“Are you fucking brain-dead?”

“That woman is sweet and smart and absolutely adorable. Why would you not want her?”

Ethan had never seen his brothers so angry. Jason looked ready to take him out back and beat him to a pulp, and Danny, usually the calm one of the group, looked ready to hold Ethan down rather than help him.

“I am fucking brain-dead. I never said I wasn’t. I screwed up and I screwed up bad, but I’m trying to make it up to her now. I just don’t know how to take those words away. She doesn’t believe me when I tell her how much she means to me.”