Teri Brown: Born of Deception

It’s on my tongue to tell him that I don’t want to mess with the spirit world either, but I keep my peace. What if Mr. Crowley is right? What if I’ll always be a target because of my abilities? So I just give Billy a regretful smile and gaze up into the sunshiny blue of his eyes. “Thank you for everything, Bronco Billy. You are one of the best men I have ever known.” There is so much more I want to say, but it’s all tangled up inside, so I say nothing about how much I care for him but that my heart belongs to someone else.

I sense from the resignation emanating from him that he already knows.

The corner of his mouth quirks upward into a sad smile. “Aw shucks, miss. Now you should go get some rest. I’ll see you at the theater, right?”

I nod.

“Then go on with you.” He turns away from me, his shoulders resolute.

In my room, I try to do as he says and even change into my nightclothes, but in spite of my fatigue, I’m oddly fidgety. I sit on my bed, tuck my feet up under my nightgown, and stare out the window at the glittering lights of London. I wonder about Jonathon and the other Sensitives. Would they choose to go to Dr. Boyle, whose greedy ambitions cause him to treat other human beings like cattle? Or would they choose to stay at the Society, where they were only valued for the information they could impart? Why wasn’t there another choice? Would Calypso have been different had she had real family or were Sensitives just inherently more susceptible to insanity?

I had thought all of my questions about my life would be answered once I moved to London to perform my magic, but instead I just have more questions. Should I stay on the tour when it goes to the States, or should I move to Paris and let my mother try to be a real parent? Do I want to attend a university somewhere? What do I want to do with my life? The only real answer I have is who I want to do it with.

Cole.

Restlessly, I get off the bed and, with difficulty, open the rain-swollen ancient window. The storm has passed, making the London night look washed clean, and I stare out at the lights, as brilliant as stars. The small side street that the hotel is located on is empty and quiet. I shiver as the chill of the air hits my skin, but it feels so fresh that I lean farther forward into the darkness, waiting, as if I’m on the edge of the cliff that is the rest of my life.

Suddenly the lights of a motorcar turn the corner. My heart leaps up in my throat because I know who it is before it even comes to a stop in front of the hotel.

Without thinking, I turn and race down the stairs and across the lobby past a surprised clerk, my nightgown billowing out behind me. The night air chills my skin but I ignore it.

“Anna!”

I leap into Cole’s arms and he catches me up close to him. For a long moment neither one of us speaks as our psychic connection is made. Time slows and is measured only in the strong, beloved heartbeat against my ear.

I’m not sure how long we stay that way before he loosens his grip just a touch so that I slide down his body until my bare feet touch the ground. I know we have to talk, that there are things that must be said, but I also know from the lilting happiness inside me that it will be all right in the end.

“Are you in love with him?” he asks first. The pain in his voice brings tears to my eyes. I know I need to choose my words very carefully. There are disadvantages to having someone you love be able to feel what you feel.

I stare into his eyes, letting him see, as well sense, what I am feeling. “I could love Billy if I let myself. He’s a wonderful friend and a wonderful man and he understands things about me that you won’t ever understand.”

I feel his pulsing misery and I continue. “But I can’t love him, because I’m already in love with you. There is no room left for him in my heart because it’s already filled with you.”

Cole’s arms tighten around me convulsively. The relief he feels almost makes me cry out.

“I love you, too,” he says, and I hear the catch in his voice.

“Then why don’t you ever tell me that?” I ask against his chest.

“It’s hard for me. I don’t know why. And things have been so crazy since you got back from your trip to France. When I saw you coming down the street with Billy the other night, I just kept thinking that I had lost you and maybe it was for the best.”

I tilt my head to see his face in the glow of the streetlamp. “How can you say that?”

“I don’t know what my presence in your life is going to do to your abilities. I won’t ever let myself hurt you in any way.”

“It will hurt me more to lose you than it would to deal with whatever happens.”

“I love you, Anna.”

“I love you too, Cole,” I murmur before his lips meet mine. I’m not alone anymore. I won’t ever be alone again.

In that moment, things become clear for me in a way they never have before and I know what I’m going to do. With Cole’s help, I’ll build a new Society and it’ll be a place where Sensitives are valued as human beings. A place where we can learn from one another and no one will have to feel as if he or she is totally alone. Together, we can help others find their way. Then I stop thinking and let myself be swept away by the enchantment of kissing Cole.

I know real magic when I feel it.

Iwas blessed to have a cadre of the most talented people who supported Born of Deception and I thank them from the bottom of my heart. Number one will always be my agent, Mollie Glick, who believes in my writing and my career and whose foresight changed my life. I also have to thank my editor, Kristin Rens, whose brilliance and editing choices consistently make my books better. Big sparkly props also go to my copy editor, Martha Schwartz, who has the thankless job of cleaning up my messes; production editor Kathryn Silsand; publicity guru Caroline Sun; Emilie Polster and Stephanie Hoffman in marketing; and of course, book designer extraordinaire Ray Shappell.

Personally, I need to thank my kid lit author friends, April Henry, Cat Winters, Amber Keyser, Inara Scott, and Miriam Forster, who write with me and listen to me whine. I have to thank my tribe, Anita, Dave, Jasmine, Jeff, Billy, and Vickie, who have been my friends through the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Thanks to my son, Ethan, and his wife, Megan, for being awesome and huge thanks to my daughter, Megan, for being the other girl in my house.

And as always, thanks to my heart, Alan.