Sergei Lukyanenko - The Genome

The door closed behind her. Alex barely suppressed the impulse to slam his fist into the plastic.

What could he do? Cajole, beg, appeal to reason?

All that was useless, when a program put into a spesh’s mind was activated. Alex went into his own cabin, stood still for a while, his hands locked together in helpless wrath.

Then, obeying a blind impulse, he unbuttoned his shirt to look at the Demon. The little devil didn’t seem even remotely angry. Its features looked sad and reproachful.

“It’s just as hard for me!” Alex cried out. The Demon stared back with deep doubt in its eyes.

“Damn it all…” Alex turned to his terminal. “Computer, establish a secret watch over the cabin of Janet Ruello. Captain’s access.”

The screen unfolded and lit up.

The black woman was lying on the bed. Her body was quaking with sobs. Her hands were clutching and crushing her pillow.

Damn Eben, damn their crazy church of the Angry God, damn the genetic engineers who programmed Janet to hate the Others!

Alex rushed out of his cabin.

“Open! Captain’s orders.”

The blocked door beeped in protest, and he walked into Janet’s quarters. Nothing had changed in the last three seconds. She was still sobbing into her pillow.

Janet’s quarters, however, did surprise Alex. He had thought Janet had practically no personal belongings, but she had managed to completely transform the drab standard surroundings. Over the bed hung a crucifix. Christ was portrayed according to the Ebenian custom—having freed one of his hands and shaking a tight fist. On the floor near the bed lay a small but plush rug of multi-colored threads. There was an open mirror-case set of expensive makeup on the nightstand. There were also four framed pictures of smiling babies: two dark-complexioned boys and two little girls, one black and the other white. And numerous other tiny trinkets that seemed utterly useless but completely changed the feel of the place.

“Janet…”

She didn’t even lift her head.

“Come on.” Alex sat down next to her, putting his hand on her quivering shoulder. “I understand what you’re feeling. And I don’t consider your position completely wrong. But we all must fulfill our life’s duty…”

“Then why do you hate us so much?” Janet whispered. “So much more than you hate the Others… All we wanted was to make everyone happy!”

“No, Janet. Not everyone hates you, believe me. More people feel sorry for you.”

“Why should they?”

“Your minds have been altered by genetic engineers…”

“Ours but not yours?” Janet burst out laughing, sitting up on her bed. “Friend-spesh, they’ve mutilated you much more than me. You aren’t even capable of love!”

“So what?”

“What do you mean, ‘so what’?” The black lady spread out her arms. “You stupid pilot… You go on getting laid, having orgasms, and thinking that’s what makes a relationship between a man and a woman?”

“Why, of course not. There’s also personal empathy, warm congeniality…”

“Oh, go shove your personal empathy! You’re much more of a freak than I am! I was made to hate the Others, so I hate them. Maybe I’m way, way wrong, but at least I haven’t lost anything! I’ve found something—hate! Do you get that? But you… you’ve lost everything! Lost half the universe! Kim, the poor little girl, watches you with adoration, follows you around like a puppy. And you don’t even notice it!”

“I do notice it, Janet! A few hours ago she and I had sex, and we both…”

Janet Ruello, the Ebenian executioner-spesh, burst out laughing.

“Deus Irae! How do I describe a sunset to a blind man?! Alex, did you know that on Eben, pilots were left capable of love?”

“That was dumb. A complete confluence with the ship can be achieved only with a lack of attachment to people.”

“That’s not it at all! It’s just that everything is interconnected. Both love and hate. It is impossible to get rid of love without putting in at least some kind of surrogate. For you pilots, that surrogate is the confluence with the ship. For detectives and tax collectors, it’s the ecstasy of discovering the truth. One day, they’ll find a surrogate for all the rest of us, as well.”

Janet thought for a moment and added:

“All but the soldiers, probably. For them, love is a necessary counterbalance to the working hatred for the enemy. We were all soldiers… so we were all capable of love.”

Alex was silent. It was impossible to argue with a spesh defending her own specialization. Besides, she was right to some extent—Edgar, in virtuality, had also talked about biochemical links.

“Janet, what are we going to do?”

“Were you convinced that the Zzygou race are not our allies?”

“They’re temporary allies,” Alex corrected her. “I’ve never had any illusions about it.”

“I won’t provoke them again.”

“Do I have your word?”

“I swear as a spesh, friend-spesh.”

“Swear an oath to me, as your captain.”

Janet smiled.

“Why?”

“Swear the Ebenian military oath.”

Her features quivered.

“Friend-spesh, I am no longer a citizen of Eben. What remains of our army is hermetically sealed off from the galaxy.”

“What difference does that make?”

Janet looked away. Reluctantly admitted:

“None.”

“Swear an oath to me, as your captain.”

“In the name of divided Humanity…” Janet began, her lips trembling.

“Continue,” ordered Alex mercilessly. Then added, in a softer voice, “I have to ask you to do this, friend-spesh.”

“In the name of divided Humanity, reigning over the stars, worshiping our Lord, in the name of my ancestors and my progeny, I swear…”—she paused briefly, while the words came to her—“I swear that I won’t harm the aliens Zey-So and Sey-Zo, temporarily occupying the same ship with me. I will not show them my true feelings. I will not prevent them from leaving the ship alive and unharmed.”

In Alex’s estimation, this oath was comprehensive. Or very nearly so.

“Thank you, Janet. Forgive me. I had to order you to do it.”

“It’s all right, Captain.” Strangely enough, Janet really meant it. “You took all my responsibility upon yourself. Now I feel I am in a war situation, so I must conceal my true feeling from the Others.”

“Thank you…” Alex bent down and kissed her lips. He hoped the kiss would be brief, just a token of affection and gratitude.

But it didn’t work that way.

Janet folded her arm around his neck, then pressed him closer. Her kiss was not as artful as Kim’s, but much more distinctive and personal. Alex felt himself unintentionally returning the movement of her lips. Forced himself to stop.

“Janet, if Kim finds out…”

“Don’t worry.” She smiled. “She and I have talked this over.”

“What?”

“I told her right off the bat that I found you attractive. Kim agreed that I had a right to feel the way I do.”

Alex could barely suppress a laugh. Incapable of love, he felt compelled to remain faithful to his girl. Kim was crazily in love with him, but she let him sleep with Janet.

With Janet, everything was different. She didn’t have any illusions about their relationship, and never demanded more than he could give. She may have lacked the genetically programmed art of the geisha, but her ordinary human experience turned out to be a worthy substitute. Everything was different. Just as different as the two women’s appearances. They were each other’s opposites—the fragile fair nymphet, and the heavyset black lady.

Although he had to give himself just as energetically to both of them.