Лорел Гамильтон - Rafael

“Could he bring her rat for real if we weren’t with her?” Nathaniel asked.

That stopped the fight. We all looked around at each other. Jean-Claude cut to the heart of it. “If ma petite is to choose a beast form at last, then we need to discover if she can choose which one it will be.”

“She might get more than one form like I did,” Micah said.

“We can’t take that chance,” Nathaniel said, shaking his head.

“What would be so wrong with her being a wererat?” Rafael asked.

“I thought you were our friend,” Nathaniel said.

“I am.”

“Then you know for our happiness she needs to be a wereleopard.”

“We all date between species here in St. Louis,” Rafael said.

“Don’t get cute, Rafael,” I said. “If I change, it needs to be leopard.”

“I will not argue the point, you are far better at relationships than I am, but I honestly did not know that your eyes had started to turn so easily.”

“It doesn’t happen all the time,” I said.

“But it’s happening more often,” Micah observed.

I nodded and agreed.

“Why was the connection so much stronger right off the bat?” I asked.

Nathaniel said, “Since Damian and I became a triumvirate with Anita, none of the other animals to call have a stronger connection than I do, until just now.”

“Has anyone else been a leader of their group?” Benito asked.

“Micah is,” Claudia said.

“No, Micah is not her moitié bête , he is her Nimir-raj; it is a different connection,” Jean-Claude said.

“How can he be her leopard king when she is not truly a wereleopard?” Rafael asked.

“Much of what ma petite does metaphysically is impossible, it is one mystery among many.”

“But Rafael is the first animal to call who ruled his animal group,” Micah said, and he drew me into the circle of his arms. I tried to let the lingering anger go and ease into it, but I couldn’t do it. I let him hold me, but I couldn’t relax against his body.

“Why should that matter this much?” Nathaniel asked.

“I don’t know,” Micah said.

I willed myself to melt into his arms, his body, and let go of the terrible tension and the ache in my gut from what my inner beasts had done. I had a thought that made the relaxing even harder.

“What do I do if this happens again tonight?”

“I was allowed one other wereleopard with me. We need to pick someone for you that isn’t a wererat,” Micah said.

“I’ll go,” Nathaniel said.

“No, Nathaniel, and you know why,” I said.

“I can’t fight well enough,” he said.

“It’s not your strong suit,” I said.

Micah kissed the side of my neck, and I snuggled in against the side of his face. We both reached for Nathaniel at the same time, and he came to us and wrapped his arms around us both. We held each other in a three-way hug, and the rising level of leopard was like some vibrating purr of energy. It felt so right. It felt like home. They were home. If any animal energy was home, this was it.

“Do you have any animals to call that can fight well enough to go in with you tonight?” Benito asked.

“It doesn’t matter, she is my queen, so only wererats can stay at her side,” Rafael said.

“You can feel some of this energy, I know you can,” I said. “Do you really want me to lose this with them tonight by accident?”

Rafael took in a big breath of air and let it out slow. “No, of course not.” But I didn’t have to be a full-on shapeshifter to know he’d just lied.

“You want her to be your queen for real,” Micah said, not accusing, just as a statement.

“After the power I just felt, who would not?”

“You son of a bitch,” I said, and started to go forward, but Micah and Nathaniel held me closer. I sank into the warm, vibrating energy, but the edge of my own anger started adding to it, and it wasn’t as relaxing.

“You didn’t want me to lie, and now you do not want the truth. What do you want from me, Anita?”

“King or no king, Rafael, don’t think you will ride roughshod over me now that you’re my rat to call.”

“If I were a human or vampire servant, there would have been sacred words and an exchange of body fluids, but because I am only a beast, your power just called out to me and I answered, because I chose to answer; all your other beasts have been accidental or had no choice in the joining.”

“What’s your point, Rafael?” Micah asked.

“Anita’s power called me like you would call a dog, but I am king of the rodere and no one’s dog to call to heel.”

“We did this to keep you alive tonight, don’t make it about egos now,” I said.

“I am saying that your power may work the same on me, but I had to want the connection; perhaps that is not the only difference in our joining compared to all your other animals to call.”

Jean-Claude finally spoke from where he had been watching us all, and probably feeling the energy like a disinterested metaphysical observer. That he did that used to bug me, but I understood now that he couldn’t sense as much if he was tangled up in it sometimes. I wanted his insight more than I wanted him in our group hug.

“ Ma petite will not go with you tonight if she cannot bring one of her other moitié bêtes with her.”

“You said this was the best way to stop the vampire that’s trying to take over the rats,” I said.

“It is,” he said.

“If they kill Rafael, they could possess us all,” Claudia said.

“They could turn us against all of you,” Benito said.

“We will find another way to defeat the vampire that is trying to test our powers,” Jean-Claude said, his face blank and empty of emotion.

“But you will have lost the rodere as your food and as your military arm,” Rafael said.

“If you win tonight, we lose nothing.”

“Weren’t you telling me all afternoon how dangerous a moitié bête could be?”

“You are one now as well, Rafael. You have extra powers even if ma petite is not beside you. We have done our part.”

“Please, Jean-Claude, don’t do this,” Claudia said.

“We do not beg the vampires for anything,” Rafael growled at her.

“If the vampire is there tonight and can call rats, then you being my beast half without me there with you isn’t going to be as strong as if I were a real vampire,” I reminded him.

“With you by my side, how much stronger would it be?”

“A lot,” Nathaniel and I said in unison.

“Let her bring one extra person with her,” Claudia said.

“It will undermine her claim as queen.”

“Not as much as her not being there at all,” Benito said.

Rafael looked at the two wererats. “You, too, Benito?”

“I don’t understand all the metaphysics, my king, but I know that changing her into one of us and losing the closeness I feel between her and the leopards is poor repayment for her risking her life for us tonight.”

“She risks her life to save all that Jean-Claude and Micah have built,” Rafael said.

“My king,” Benito said, and just that, but Rafael’s face softened out of that arrogant handsomeness that he hid behind sometimes, usually when he knew he wasn’t going to win an argument.

“I give you my word, Jean-Claude, Micah, Nathaniel, Anita, that I will not do anything tonight to call your rat above the others. I was drunk the way you can be when a power first manifests itself, but I am a king and I am better than that. I will not betray the trust you have in me.”

“How do I trust you with my gut still aching from what you did?” I asked.

“I have given you my word, Anita. In all the years we’ve known each other, have I ever broken my vow?”