Jeff Inlo - Nightmare's Shad

His form exploded with blistering radiance before her, lighting up the surrounding shadows, making himself the only true focal point for her attention. He screamed at her with lust for her agony.

"You don't want the delver to suffer! That is your true pain! What would be the best thing he could do for you? He can't save you, you know that. Do you want him to join you in suffering? Of course not, it would make everything worse for you! He doesn't care. All he's thinking about is how he left you. He has his own guilt. He thinks he's responsible for your suffering, so it has become his pain, and that's what he wants to get rid of. I told you he was doing it for himself."

The emotional pain erupted in Linda. She knew Baannat was tormenting her, twisting the truth into lies so that she could suffer. Still, the words as well as the meaning behind them tore at her soul.

Baannat fed on her pain.

"Don't you see, woman? It's so simple. You're going to blame your pitiful delver for coming in here trying to save you. And what do you think he's going to do? He's going to blame you for getting trapped in here in the first place. Do you want to know what he's really going to think? He's going to ask himself over and over why you just didn't let the caelifera eat you alive. That would have been better."

Enin tried to force his will past Baannat's. He pressed his own words into Linda's mind.

"You will not blame each other, Linda. You know that."

Baannat pressed Enin aside.

"Of course you will blame each other. You already do that. I can read your thoughts here, read your fears. You blame each other for everything. You actually blame him for being a delver, don't you?"

She wanted to deny it with all her heart. She wanted to scream "NO!" but she could not find a voice to speak.

"If he wasn't a delver, he wouldn't always put himself in danger. You wouldn't be here and he wouldn't have to save you. You actually hate him for what he is. Don't you find that amusing?"

There was nothing amusing about it to Enin. Once more he fought past the slink ghoul and entered Linda's thoughts.

"Everything he says is a lie. You are with Ryson because he is what he is. You know that. Even Baannat knows that. Ryson just wants to be with you, to save you and he will go through any pain to make it so."

"Isn't that wonderful for the delver, but what does it do for the woman?" Baannat demanded. "His pain will become her pain. We all know that. If he enters this place, he does so to remove his own guilt and make her pain that much worse."

"Don't listen to him. He's just trying to use Ryson against you."

"I don't have to use the delver against her. She does it all herself. If she could speak to the delver at this moment, what would she say? She would tell him to stay away. You know that's true, so do I… so does she. Yet, he will come here anyway. He wouldn't listen to her because it's her fault she's here."

"No, it's my fault!" Enin proclaimed. "And it's my fault Ryson will be here. Linda, that one thing must remain true to you.

"Go ahead, brother. Take all the blame. She already blames you for sending her to the mountains. She can't say it, but she knows it's true. You are projecting yourself into her consciousness. Search her thoughts. You will find the blame there."

Enin didn't dig for Linda's thoughts. He didn't have to. Baannat was right. Linda did blame Enin for sending her to the mountains. He forced them apart. Enin's intentions were honorable, but what did that matter?

Enin almost broke away from Linda, but beyond her superficial blame there was a deeper emotion, one of self torment. She blamed herself more than anyone. The wizard hung unto Linda's consciousness with all his might. He tried to breakthrough to her again, but her own torment prevented it.

Images and memories swirled in Linda's thoughts. She recalled the journey with Ryson to the mountains. Ryson gave her another chance. He said they should run off, but she refused. She agreed to Enin's suggestion of separation, a separation that would bring them together in Baannat's realm, and then tear them apart.

Her mind reeled. Baannat was right. Ryson would blame her, and she in return would blame him. Her pain grew.

#

"I need help, Lief, and I think you're the one I need to talk to."

The apparition did not smile or frown. The spirit of Lief Woodson simply looked at Ryson expectantly, waiting for the delver to move down the right path.

"They took Linda," Ryson explained, "or are you already aware of that?"

"I'm aware of it."

"The caelifera, they took her to Baannat, didn't they?

"Yes, she's with Baannat, but she's not alone. She is with Enin."

A ray of hope.

"Is he protecting her? Can he save her?"

"No, to both questions. He is unable to do either. He has separated himself from the magical energies that give him power. He is as trapped as she is."

And just like that, the hope died.

"In the dark realm?"

"No… and yes. Their bodies remain in the dark realm, but their awareness-their very essence-is now in a completely new state of existence. It is not life or death… or even in the veil between. It is a place outside the reach of both."

More than hope was dying. Ryson worried Linda was now completely out of his reach as well.

"Can I get there… to her I mean… wherever she is?"

"The path remains open to you. Baannat wants you to enter. He's waiting for you."

Not a surprise. Dzeb warned him it was a trap. He didn't care then, and he didn't care now. He only cared about getting to Linda. Lief was telling him that was possible, but he also wanted to get her back to safety.

"Can I get them out?"

"That will depend on you."

"What do I have to do?"

"You have to believe."

Ryson looked down on the ground and exhaled heavily. He focused on his needs, and tried once more.

"That doesn't answer the question. Like I said before, I need help. I don't need some cryptic answer that Dzeb could have told me." He then looked back into the ghost's eyes. "I don't have time for this. Please, Lief, tell me what I have to do."

"Hear me out completely, I know you want to leave here as quickly as possible, but you have to realize that if you don't listen to what I have to say and find the answer, you never will. You have a chance to save both Enin and Linda, as well as yourself, do you believe that?"

"I want to believe it, that's why I'm here."

Lief considered all he knew. He had insight beyond what was available to Ryson, that was true, but he himself was still trying to grasp the events that brought him back to the physical world. He spoke with a willingness to help his friend, but also with a desire to understand the full scope of life and death.

"You can't save them if you go in as you are; blinded with anger. You won't find your answer that way."

"You mean angry at Baannat? How can I not be…"

Lief cut him off.

"You are not just angry with Baannat. It goes deeper than that."

"I know it goes deeper than that, but what's that got to do with anything?" Ryson demanded, becoming more frustrated than ever.

"And your anger builds even now. What is it you are angry at? Life?"

"Yes… maybe… I don't know. I'm angry at all of it."

"I know. I felt that same anger. Do you remember? When we first met, we argued often."

Ryson recalled the first day he met Lief Woodson. The sphere of Ingar had broken free from its tomb. It was polluting the land with tainted magic. Emotions boiled over often, that was true. There was, however, a reason for it, and Ryson made that clear.

"But Ingar's sphere was poisoning the land, especially the elves. We were all living on the edge of a knife and didn't even know it. The magic was making us quick to judgment. We all got mad… at everything. You were no different."