Sara Larson - Defy

“Tell Borracio that I got his message loud and clear,” I said as I unhooked the unconscious man’s scabbard and tightened it around my own waist. I sheathed the nicer of the two swords, and chucked the other one into the river flowing next to the opening we’d climbed through.

“What are you?” the man who was still conscious asked.

“A very good fighter,” I said as I stormed away into the darkening jungle.

THE SMALL FIRE hissed and popped in front of me, like a glowing beacon, announcing my presence to any creature — human or otherwise — that might be lurking nearby in the dark trees. I felt exposed with the bright flames illuminating me, filling the air with light and smoke. But it would have been even worse to huddle in the damp, dark night without them.

My belly ached with hunger and fear. There was still no sign of Rylan. I’d half hoped he’d notice my fire and find me. If Deron and the rest of the guard could see me now, it wouldn’t have mattered how many fights I’d won. My fear of the dark and snakes would defeat me in the end. A completely ignominious way to go. My body battled between the adrenaline of fear and the exhaustion and need for sleep that made my limbs heavy and my eyelids slow to open after each blink.

Until I heard a snap in the bushes behind me.

Instantly awake, I held my breath, my fingers inching toward the sword that lay across my lap. I don’t think a jaguar or snake would make a noise like that, not if it were stalking me. Could it be Rylan?

I turned to glance behind me and just as I did, I saw a blur of motion out of the corner of my eye. I swung back around to see a massive black body lunging out of the bushes toward me. I only had time to open my mouth to scream and swing my sword up to block my neck before the creature was on me, claws and teeth flashing in the firelight, diving for my jugular. I threw my weight backward and tried to lift the sword up into the jaguar’s belly, as its claws tore through my tunic, pressing me into the ground. I felt fire on my ribs and arm, and distantly realized it was pain. But there was no time to assimilate any damage, not while the beast was still trying to get past the blade. The edge of my sword cut into my jaw, but I didn’t care. It was the only thing keeping the huge cat from tearing out my throat.

It tried again, biting down hard, and got a mouthful of blade. It growled in pain and swiped the side of my head with one massive paw. More fire exploded across my skull and stars popped in front of my eyes. My grip on my sword weakened.

Suddenly, the jaguar let out a howl of such pain and fury that it almost deafened me. A sword protruded from its chest. Hot, red blood poured from the wound onto me. The cat’s eyes rolled into its head and it collapsed on top of me, pushing all the air from my lungs. And then, just when my vision began to go dark from lack of oxygen, it was gone and Rylan stood over me, his chest heaving, holding a sword coated in blood.

“Alex! Are you okay?” He dropped to his knees beside me. The fire was gone now and in its place was a pain so intense, so excruciating, I didn’t dare move, afraid I’d make it worse.

I was soaked with blood, my own and the jaguar’s. My ribs, my left arm, and the side of my head all throbbed. I was afraid to look down and see how bad it really was.

“We need to get you cleaned up and we have to sew up these wounds. None of them look too deep, luckily, but I can’t tell for sure. There’s too much blood, and it’s too dark.” Rylan kept up a steady stream of commentary as he pulled his tunic over his head and began to tear it into strips. “I didn’t bring any needles or thread, though, so we’re going to have to bind them as best we can and get back to the palace as quickly as possible.”

“I can’t,” I finally said, my voice barely above a whisper. I sounded like a girl — I couldn’t get my tone gruff enough, but I didn’t care. I was probably going to die in this jungle tonight anyway.

“Yes, you can. You’re the toughest fighter in the palace, and you aren’t going to let one little jaguar finish you off, are you?” Rylan had bent over me and was tugging on my tunic now. I realized what he was trying to do all at once and I reached up with my right hand and grabbed his wrist.

“Stop.” It was hard to speak past the pain, the breathlessness that still plagued me. I wondered if the jaguar had punctured my lung. “Don’t. Don’t tear it.”

“Alex, you’re hurt and bleeding. I need to clean the wounds first of all and then —”

“ No .” I tightened my grip on his wrist, trying to pull his hand away from my tunic. “Please.”

He stared down at me, his face shadowed in the firelight. The light undulated in the breeze, briefly illuminating his face, and I realized his eyes were full of remorse. My stomach clenched. He thought I was going to die, too.

With a deep sigh, he covered my right hand with his left. “Alexa, I know.”

“You know wh —” I cut myself off with a horrified gasp as I realized what he’d said. Alexa . Not Alex . A name I never thought I’d hear spoken to me again. I shook my head, my eyes filling with tears. My mouth opened, but nothing came out.

His grip tightened on my hand as my whole body began to tremble. From pain, from blood loss, from shock.

Finally, I managed to whisper, “ How ?”

“I’ve known since the first day I met you.” He stared at my mouth, at my chin, anywhere but my eyes.

The pain that encompassed my body was eclipsed by the shock pulsing through me with each beat of my heart. He knew ? He’d always known?

“You and Marcel slipped up in front of me; he called you Alexa, and you responded. He realized I’d heard and later swore me to secrecy. I’m sorry I never told you. He made me promise.”

The tears that had gathered in my eyes leaked out, slipping down both of my temples as I lay there on the ground, broken inside and out. “You knew,” I repeated, my voice hoarse.

Rylan nodded, reaching with one hand to brush the tears from my face. “Now, please, let me clean your wounds and figure out how we’re going to help you.” His fingers lingered on my temple.

“I think you’d better let us help you, or else the girl will most likely die from her injuries.”

The voice came from just outside the light of my fire. I forced myself to lift my head, but when I did, the pain became unbearable. Strange, bright lights popped in front of my eyes and then everything began to tunnel into darkness. I saw Borracio step into the circle of the firelight.

And then I was gone.

WHEN I WOKE, I was lying on a bed of furs and the pain was gone.

Above me was the same damp stone ceiling I’d seen the last time I’d woken in these caves, but it was a different cavern. Someone’s bedroom, from what I could gather, as I turned to glance around. I was alone, with only two torches to light the small cavern. I hardly dared look down at myself, afraid of what I’d see.

“Alex, you’re awake.” I heard Rylan’s voice and turned to see him rushing through the opening toward me. “How do you feel?” There was a tenderness in his voice I’d never heard before, and I remembered that last night when I lay dying on the ground in front of him, he’d admitted knowing I was a girl all these years. Simultaneous relief and anger surged up.

“I don’t know,” I answered gruffly when he dropped to his knees next to me.

“A healer was with you all night. She only came out an hour ago, but she said you would be fit for travel when you woke.” Rylan reached to touch my head, but I jerked out of his grasp. He pulled his hand back and looked down at his lap, but not before I saw the hurt flash through his usually warm chocolate-brown eyes. The eyes I’d taken far too much notice of recently. “You’re mad,” he said quietly.