Elizabeth Haydon - Destiny - Child of the Sky

Her eyes returned to Gwydion, who was watching her intently, and as she looked into his face she saw it again in her mind’s eye, vague pictures of him from the lost night returning to be recalled, varying expressions gracing his countenance, all of them joyful. She was ill prepared for the onslaught of memories that caught her off-guard, blowing her backward. She reached for him; he caught her as she swayed in the chair, her eyes pleading for help before they rolled back and the world went dark in the roar of the flood.

“You know, I would never take you for the fainting type, but you certainly do a lot of it lately.”

Gwydion’s voice broke through the fog that surrounded her jumbled thoughts, clear in its tone. The other voices she was hearing were occluded by memory, fighting for dominance in her understanding. Rhapsody struggled for consciousness, but succeeded only in determining she was lying down on her bed, because her cheek brushed the stiff lace that trimmed the flannel pillowcase. She lost her battle to hang on to the Present, and succumbed to the contradictory, confusing voices and images from the Past.

She could hear the words of their wedding vows, beautiful in the way that only a Singer of her power and a dragon who had loved someone through two lifetimes could speak them. She had committed the song the vows created to the grotto, so that Elysian itself would bear witness to the love promised there. The song rang there still, now that the memory was returned, lighting the cavern with gladness.

Then the image shifted, and she saw other faces, heard other voices. I’m not seeing your son anymore, Llauron. I’ve done as you asked; we’ve parted company .

What a, shame, and. after I specifically gave him my blessing. A shame; I urn-sorry, my dear.

Rhapsody pitched from side to side in her coma-like state. They are all liars , Achmed had insisted. At least in the old world you knew who the bad guys were because they professed what they stood for. Here the allegedly good ones are calculating users; the ancient evils could never wreak the level of havoc that the Lord and Lady Cymrian did. And you want to hand yourself over to the potentially biggest liar of all on a silver platter .

Well, if I do, it is my choice to do so. I will take the risk, and live or die by my own volition.

-^

Wrong. We may all suffer that fate, because you aren’t just compromising yourself, you are throwing all of our neutrality into the pot, and if you overbet your hand, we all lose.

She could feel hot tears on her neck, and arms holding her tightly, but gently. It’s all right, Sam. You won’t hurt me. Really. It will be all right .

Emily, I would never, never hurt you on purpose; I hope you know that.

Rhapsody’? Rhapsody, please say something. Please.

Is your temper tantrum over?

I’m sorry; gods, I’m so sorry —

The hair that had fallen into her eyes was brushed back gently. Oi say we kill ’im. And if we’re wrong, an’ another one shows up, we kill ’im too .

You can’t go around killing people if you’re not sure whether you’re right.

And why not’? Always worked for us before. Seriously, miss, this is too big to take chances with, if you’re not sure.

The shooting lighttone had touched the newly blooming flowers of her garden, absorbing their colors and spinning them skyward, exploding into shimmering fireworks as it impacted with the dome of the firmament. Ashe’s face smiled down at her in her memory.

Are you sure?

I’m sure.

Hazily she slapped away the hand that caressed her forehead. You seem to have appointed yourself the guardian of my heart, Rhapsody. Why don’t you make me the protector of yours? I promise I will keep it safe .

It was a hoax; Llauron is not dead; you were used. I’m sorry, I wish I could tell you in a more gentle way.

Please be what you seem. Please, please don’t hurt me.

I am. And I never will.

Please understand I would rather die at this moment than tell you what I am about to.

Why?

Because I know what I am going to tell you will hurt you.

He had picked her up from the spot where he had married her and carried her carefully over the threshold and up the stairs to their nuptial bed. He trembled as he leaned over to kiss her, and when he looked down into her eyes she saw the same boy she had fallen in love with a world before, on a moonlit summer night under the lacy shadows of a willow tree.

She could hear her father’s voice: When you find the one thing in your life you believe in above anything else, you owe it to yourself to stand by it — it will never come again, child. And if you believe in it unwaveringly, the world has no other choice but to see it as you do, eventually. For who knows it better than you? Don’t be afraid to take a difficult stand, darling. Find the one thing that matters — everything else will resolve itself .

Rhapsody opened her eyes. Gwydion was looking down into her face, worry on his own. When he saw her awake he grinned in relief; then his grin dimmed to one tempered with concern, and more than a touch of fear.

“Welcome back. Are you all right?”

She closed her eyes and put the heel of the hand to her forehead, endeavoring to drive the pounding headache out of her skull. “I don’t know; what happens now?”

“I guess that depends on how you’re feeling,” Gwydion said, a hint of nervousness in his voice. “If you’d like my vote, I say we find a goat hut and go live happily ever after.” A look of undiluted love washed over his face for a moment, then was tempered by her uncertainty. “I love you, Aria; gods, I’ve been dying to tell you this for so long. But I don’t want to overwhelm you; I know you’ve had enough of that state to last a lifetime. So I’ll follow your lead. Tell me what you need to know, or what you’re feeling. Please, tell me what’s in your heart.”

Rhapsody looked into his face and studied his eyes. They were free from deception, or so she thought, with hope brimming beneath the surface; he seemed to be holding his breath, waiting for her answer. In her mind she tied up all her feelings of betrayal and resentment into a large mound and set them aside for a moment to be better able to discern how she really felt. That she still loved him she knew, had known all along; it seemed apparent that he still loved her, too. But there was something she had to learn before she could decide anything else. She sat up with great difficulty and a little help from Gwydion.

“I need to know something, but I am afraid to hear the answer, more than I have ever been afraid of anything in my life,” she said. She tried to give voice to the question, but after many moments of opening her mouth and then closing it again, she began to cry. “I can’t even bring myself to ask you,” she wept.

Gwydion took her in his arms and cradled her. “Let me see if I can both ask and answer it for you, so you don’t have to. Are we really married? Yes.”

Rhapsody’s tears ceased, but her face grew paler as she pulled away from him. “That’s not it,” she said.

“Very well, then, am I really your Sam, and are you really my darling Emily? Yes.”

“Ashe—”

“Not that one, either? All right. Do I still love you? Impossible to express how much, but yes.”

“Please—”

“Am I, or have I ever been, married to or in love with anyone else? No.”

“Will you shut up ?” Rhapsody snarled. Gwydion was taken aback, and dropped his hands from her arms. The pain on his face twisted Rhapsody’s heart, and tears sprang to her eyes again. “I’m sorry, Sam,” she whispered. “I didn’t mean to say that. Please, just let me think a minute.”