Домагой Курмаич - Mother of Learning

Additionally, he couldn’t really afford to start anything big while Zach was still incapacitated and vulnerable. Taking some time off to figure out what to do about his family and friends was… doable.

Thus, not long after his argument with his simulacrum, Zorian found himself back in Cirin. He told the simulacrum to make himself scarce for a while and then seamlessly took over his place.

Well, mostly seamlessly.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Kirielle asked him suspiciously, narrowing her eyes at him. "You… you aren’t thinking on going back on your word, are you?"

She didn’t seem panicked, more outraged at the idea. She placed her hands on her hips and pouted at him in a way that was probably supposed to look angry but looked more like she had an upset stomach or something.

"No take-backs!" she declared, pointing her finger at him. "Mom says that’s not allowed! You said you’re taking me with you, and I’m going!"

Zorian clacked his tongue in distaste. All he did was stare at her a little, and she immediately started jumping at this one specific conclusion… how judgmental. Never mind that she was essentially correct here, was his old self so bad that this was a legitimate first conclusion she came up to?

…okay, yeah, he could kind of see her reasoning here.

"I didn’t say anything about not taking you," Zorian said slowly.

"Then what?" she asked curiously.

"I’m missing some of my school books," Zorian told her. "I’d appreciate it if whoever took them returned them to me before we leave the house."

"Err, yeah, I will– I mean, I’m sure they’ll turn up in your room by the time I finish packing," Kirielle fumbled, punctuating her statement with a nervous laugh.

She then gave him one final suspicious look before running off upstairs to finish her packing.

The simulacrum he had displaced had been watching the whole exchange through his senses. His copy did not comment on his actions in any way, but Zorian could feel the simulacrum’s amusement at how things turned out.

"Shut up, idiot," Zorian whispered under his breath. "This is all your fault, anyway."

He did not need to speak up verbally, of course, but it made him feel slightly better to do so. Why hadn’t he dismissed his stupid copy, again?

Oh, right. He didn’t want to waste mana and he had a task for him later.

In any case, nothing of real note happened until Ilsa knocked on their door, just like she always did at the start of the month, and Zorian volunteered to check up on that.

Sure enough, he found Ilsa waiting for him behind the door. After an appraising glance, she adjusted her glasses and guessed his identity.

"Zorian Kazinski?" she asked.

"That’s me," Zorian confirmed. "Come in, Miss Zileti."

"Oh, you know me?" she asked in mild surprise, stepping into the house.

"Err, kind of," Zorian said. "Someone pointed you out to me. You’re a teacher from the academy, right?"

"That’s right," Ilsa said. "I didn’t know I’m that famous. Hopefully you heard only nice things about me, yes?"

She gave him a small smile, and Zorian awkwardly returned it.

She didn’t remember anything. That is, of course she didn’t remember anything. He and Zach had already done a check of the various temporary loopers to see if any of them made it out in soul form like Zorian. The results were as expected as they were disappointing. They were all alone in this. Nobody else had made it out.

It was strange and more than a little painful for Zorian to see Ilsa like this. He had worked with her for nearly a year, and she had been one of the people he had been relatively close to. Now that Ilsa was dead, the new one had no idea who he was.

The same was true for Alanic, Taiven, Kael, Xvim, and so many others. They were alive again, but they were not people he had spent all those months working with. He could rebuild these relationships, but without the common goal of escaping the time loop and the limited ability to interact with people outside the group, the nature of those relationships would completely differ. In the meantime, he had to interact with all these people while constantly walking on eggshells because he subconsciously viewed them as friends and allies, and had a year worth of habits and instincts to reinforce that… while they just viewed him as some stupid teenage kid acting a little weird around them.

He’d manage. He totally would.

But damn was this making him depressed…

"Mister Kazinski? Are you alright?" Ilsa asked him, breaking him out of his self-pity.

"I’m fine," he assured her. "Just… thinking about some things. It’s nothing important."

He turned the scroll in his hands a few times before casually directing his mana to flow along the sides of the seal, causing it to pop off without resistance. He then glanced at the certificate inside for the sake of appearances and set it aside.

"That’s pretty impressive," Ilsa noted. "Although you held onto the scroll for a while, I could tell you spent most of that time distracted with other thoughts. Once you actually focused on the task of removing the seal, you did it quickly and easily. I see someone is continuing in Daimen’s footsteps."

Once, the comparison to Daimen would see him bristling inside at the slight. Now it was just a mildly exasperating statement. He would likely never be totally okay with being compared to his oldest brother like that, but these comparisons no longer had the same sting they once did.

"Only in very general terms," Zorian told her. "My brother and I are very different people."

"Of course," Ilsa smoothly agreed. "Everyone is their own person. I simply meant that you also show signs of great talent."

Their discussion proceeded in very predictable fashion. Once she heard he was taking Kirielle with him to Cyoria, she brought up the possibility of renting a room at Imaya’s place, which Zorian accepted. She also informed him that he wouldn’t get to choose his mentor like he was supposed to, and that he was simply assigned to Xvim Chao instead. Zorian pretended he knew nothing about the man and Ilsa pretended he was simply a normal, if slightly demanding teacher. He also chose his electives. They were the exact same ones he had chosen the first time he had done all this, except this time the entire process took less than a minute, since he simply told Ilsa his choices the moment she brought the topic up.

It was all so routine and familiar that he found himself quickly slipping into a sort of practiced role he had learned to play over the many restarts during which he had done this. It felt comforting and frightening at the same time. Comforting, because this was probably the first time since he had gotten out of the time loop that he felt certain he was making the right choices. Frightening, because he suddenly felt like he was in the time loop all over again. Like everything around him was unreal and illusionary. Unbidden, the notion that he was still trapped in that ever-repeating month popped into his mind and refused to go away.

He imagined himself living through this month, winning against his foes, befriending people he knew from the time loop, changing things for the better and getting emotionally invested in it all… only for the whole thing to turn to smoke in the end when the time loop inevitably reset itself and he woke up in his room in Cirin, just like he always did. It was horrifying.

It was also stupid. He was definitely out of the time loop. The aranea and the mercenaries that had been knocked out of the time loop by Red Robe were back, and Red Robe himself was again active in the world. The spirit world was also once again accessible – he and Zach had checked that already. All evidence pointed at them being out for real.