Harlan Ellison - Approaching Oblivion - Road Signs On the Treadmill Toward Tomorrow

If there had only been time. He was chagrined for just a moment that he had let them down, had failed to do what he had been left behind to do. But that lasted only a moment and he knew he had said as much as anyone could say, and it would be right for the children of the dark places, even if it took them a thousand years to find another home.

Then he turned, as the seconds withered, knowing the solar storm had drenched him and any moment he would vaporize. He looked up into the water-blue sky, past the blinding sun that suddenly flared and consumed the heavens, and he shouted, “I'll always be with you-” but the last word was never completed; he was gone.

Soon after, the seas gently began to boil.

Los Angeles, California/1972

There are two ways to write a story using words in a foreign tongue. The first is to explain every single word as it is used, by restating its meaning in English, or by hoping its use in context will clarify for the reader. The second is to attempt by syntactical manipulation an approximation of the dialect and tongue, eschewing the use of any foreign words. The third is to provide a glossary and hope the reader won't be such a dummy as to get annoyed at the author wanting to do it right.

Additionally, the author, a cute and terrific little person who wants you should enjoy this story to the utmost, has called on the good offices of his friend, Mr. Tim Kirk, a Gentile artist, but also a three-time Hugo award winner, to do a drawing of Evsise, the Zsouchmoid. It is appended herewith, for your pleasure.

Adonai (ah-doe-noy') The sacred title of God.

averah (ah-vay'-reh) Loosely, an unethical or undesirable act.

Bar Mitzvah (bar mitz'-vah) The ceremony, as in many cultures, of the beginning of puberty; held in a temple, it is the ceremony in which a 13-year-old Jewish boy reaches the status and assumes the duties of a “man.”

bialy(ies) (bee-oll'-lee) A flat breakfast roll, shaped like a round wading pool, sometimes sprinkled with onion.

bissel (biss'-el) A little bit

brechh A sound you make when varjing.

brisies (briss) The circumcision ceremony.

buhbie (booh'-bee) Usually an affectionate term of endearment, although occasionally it is used sardonically.

bummerkeh (bum'-er-keh) A female bum, a loose lady. A najkeh.

chutzpah (choootz'-puh) Gall, brazen nerve, audacity, presumption-plus-arrogance such as no other word, and no other language, can do justice to.

dreck (drek) Shit, dung, garbage, trash, excrement, crap.

Evsise (ev'-seese) A native of Theta 996:VI, Cluster Messier 3 in Canes Venatici. (See illustration.)

farblondjet (far-blawn'-jet) Lost (but really lost), mixed-up, wandering around with no idea where you are.

farchachdah (far-kachh'-dah) Dizzy, confused, dopey, punchy.

fehl (feh!) An exclamatory expression of disgust.

folks-mensh (fokes'-mentch) This has many meanings. In the story it is intended to convey the meaning of a person who is interested in Jewish life, values, experience, and wants to carry on the tradition.

galus (goll'-us) An exile.

Gentile (jenn'-tile) The goyim. Non-Jews.

Gevalt! (ghe-vollt'!) A cry of fear, astonishment, amazement.

glitch (glitch) A shady, not kosher or reputable affair.

goldeneh medinah (gold'-en-eh meh-dee'-nah) Literally, “golden country”; originally, it meant America to Jews fleeing the European pogroms; a land of freedom, justice and rare opportunity. Well, two out of three ain't bad.

goniff(s) (gon'-iff) A thief, a crook; sometimes said with affection to mean a clever person; a dishonest businessman.

goniffed (gon'-iffed) The act of stealing, as in swiping Zsouchmuhn out of its orbit.

guderim (guh-dare'-im) My Mother used to say, “That kid is eating out my guderim from aggravation,” which leads me to believe the word means, literally, heart, guts, liver-and-lights, stomach, everything in the middle of your body.

Kaddish (kahd'-ish) A prayer glorifying God's name. The most solemn and one of the most ancient of an Jewish prayers; the mourner's prayer.

kayn-ahora (kine'-a haw'-reh) The phrase uttered to show that one's praises are genuine and not contaminated by envy.

kike (kike) A word you won't find in this story.

kosher (ko'-sher) As a Hebrew-Yiddish word it means only one thing: fit to eat, because ritually clean according to the dietary laws. As American slang it means authentic, the real McCoy, trustworthy, reliable, on the up-and-up, legal.

krenk (krenk) An illness. Also used to mean “nothing” in a sentence like, “He asked me for a loan of fifty bucks; a krenk I'll give him!”

mechaieh (meh-chhhhhy'-eh) Pleasure, great enjoyment, a real joy. Roll the chhh like a Scotsman.

meshiginah (meh-shih'-ghin-ah), meshugge (meh-shu'-geh), mishegoss (meesh'-eh-goss) Crazy, nuts, wildly extravagant, absurd. There are spellings for male and female, but I've written it the way it sounded when my Mother called me it. Meshugge is to be a meshiginah and mishegoss is the crazy stuff a meshiginah is doing.

mensch (mench) Someone of consequence, someone to emulate and admire; a terrific human being; I always pictured a mensch as someone who knew exactly how much to tip.

minyan (min'-yun) Quorum. The ten male Jews required for a religious service. Solitary prayer is laudable, but a minyan possesses special merit, for God's Presence is said to dwell among them.

momzer (mom'-zer) A bastard, an untrustworthy person; a stubborn, difficult person, a detestable, impudent person.

naches (nahchhhhh'-ess), nafkeh (noff'-keh) Also nafka. A prostitute.

nu(?) (!) (nu) A remarkably versatile interjection, interrogation, expletive; like, “So?”

nuhdz (nud'-jeh), nuhdzing (nud'-jing) To bore, to pester, to nag, to be bugged to eat your asparagus, to wake up and take her home, etc.

oysvorf (oyss'-voorf) A scoundrel, a bum, an outcast, an ingrate.

pisher (pish'-er) A young, inexperienced person, a “young squirt,” an inconsequential person, a “nobody.”

plotz (plotts) To split, to burst, to explode; to be outraged; to be aggravated beyond bearing.

pupik (pu'-pik) Navel. Belly-button.

punim (pu'-nim) Face.

putz (putts) Literally, vulgar slang for “penis” but in usage a term of contempt for an ass, a jerk, a fool, a simpleton or yokel. It is much stronger than schmuck and shouldn't be used unless you know some crippling Oriental martial art-form.

Reb (reb) Rabbi.

schlemiel (shleh'-meal) A foolish person, a simpleton; a consistently unlucky or unfortunate person; a clumsy, gauche, butterfingered person; a social misfit; this term is more pitying than schlimazel and more affectionate by far than schmuck.

schlimazel (shli'-moz-zl) Same as above, but different in tone. A schlimazel believes in luck, but never has any. The terms are often used interchangeably by people who don't perceive the subtle differences.

schmuck (shmuck) Literally, a penis, but in common usage, a dope, a jerk, a boob; or, a son of a bitch, a real prick.

Shabbes (shah'-biss) The Sabbath.

Shema (sheh'-ma) The first word of the most common of Hebrew prayers: “Shema Yisrael,” Hear O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is One!

shikker (shick'-er) A drunk or, as an adjective, drunkenness.

shikseh (shik'-seh) A non-Jewish woman, especially a young one.

shivah (shi'-vuh) The seven solemn days of mourning for the dead.

shmachel (shmah'-chhhl) To flatter, to fawn, to butter up, usually to outfox someone to get them to do what you want.

shmatehs (shmot'-tahs) A rag, literally. But in common usage to mean a cheap, shoddy, junky dress.

shmootz (shmootz) Dirt.

shoul (shool) Synagogue.

shpilkess (shpill'-kess) As my Mother used it, to mean aggravation, an unsettlement of self, jumping stomach. But I've been advised it really means “ants in the pants.”