Joan Vinge - The Snow Queen

Gundhalinu frowned. “Then it’s possible…”

“What is?”

“Moon thinks he’s become Starbuck.”

“Starbuck!” Jerusha put a hand to her forehead. “Yes — yes, it does fit. Thank you, gods! And thank you.” She turned back to him grimly. “I’ve been trying to learn who Starbuck is, so I can nail him for murder, and illegally killing mers.”

“Murder?” Gundhalinu started.

She nodded. “He murdered a dillyp, or let his Hounds do it. And I thought he’d murdered Moon too… but it’s still enough. This time I’ll sting Arienrhod where it hurts!” So yorfve gone rottener than I ever dreamed, Dawntreader. She saw in her mind a battered boy with a smashed flute, a killer in black against the image of a corpse-strewn shore. Never in my wildest nightmares did I imagine you’d fall so high.

“I — promised Moon that we’d find him… help him, if we could. The Change will get him anyway, if we can’t.”

“Don’t be so sure of that. So Moon still wants him back, even after what she must have seen him do on that beach?” Jerusha was struck by the sudden disconcerting realization that Sparks had belonged to both Arienrhod and Moon… and still did. Arienrhod’s clone.

“How did you know about that?” Gundhalinu said.

“Never mind.” Jerusha reached out, touched a conical metal device attached to sensor pads.

“She says she still loves him. You don’t simply stop, after years… She only wants to know whether he feels the same way about her.” A glimmer of lost hope surfaced.

Is that really all she wants? “I can’t let her loose in the city, BZ.” Jerusha shook her head, fingering brass on her collar. “I’m sorry. But I can’t risk it.”

“I don’t understand. She’s not going to contaminate anyone. I’ll stay with her until we find him.”

“And then what?”

He lifted his hands, dropped them again. “I don’t know… Commander, the Change is almost here, and when it happens it’s not going to matter whether she’s been off world or not. The Summers hate the whole idea. She was only on Kharemough a few weeks. What harm can she do?”

“You’re asking me what harm a sibyl can do here, when she knows the reason for her existence?” almost angrily. “If we manage to pick up Starbuck, she can share a cell with him. But otherwise, believe me, it’s better for all concerned if she never sees him again, and he never sees her.”

“I can’t believe I’m hearing that from you.” The words were heavy with sullen accusation.

“And I can’t believe I’m hearing you say she’s no threat, Gundhalinu! What the hell’s gotten into you?” Don’t push me, BZ. Be a good Blue, and accept it; don’t make me hurt you now.

“I care about her. It seems to me that ought to mean something.” He began to cough, pressing his chest.

“More than your duty to the law?”

“She’s just one innocent Summer girl! Why the hell can’t we leave it alone?” It had the sound of a man in torment; Jerusha realized that he was his own most unforgiving inquisitor.

“She’s not just another Summer, BZ,” she said with heavy reluctance. “Haven’t you ever noticed how much she resembles Arienrhod?” His expression said that she was out of her mind.

“I’m serious, Gundhalinu! I have every reason to believe the Queen got herself cloned somehow. And the only reason she could possibly have for that would be that she doesn’t want Winter to end.” She told him everything, every detail of the circumstantial evidence. “So you see — Moon is a sibyl. I can’t risk letting Arienrhod get her hands on — on herself, carrying a deadly weapon like that. She’s doing all she can to hold on to her power.” And go on corrupting everything she touches on this world. “But I’m doing anything I can to make sure she doesn’t get away with it. And that includes keeping Moon out of her hands.”

“I can’t believe that.” Gundhalinu shook his head, and she realized that he couldn’t. “Moon — Moon is like no one I ever met. She’s nothing like Arienrhod! She cares about everyone, everything — and they feel it in her. If there’s a spark of decency in a man or woman she makes it catch fire. They fall in love with her… they can’t help it.” An inane smile turned up the corners of his mouth.

Jerusha grimaced. “For gods’ sakes, BZ, nobody’s that wonderful.”

“She is. Just talk to her.”

“I’d better not even look at her, if she’s all you claim. No wonder they say ‘love is blind,”“ gently. She felt her own apologetic smile grow as healthy resentment turned his mouth into a line. “Your perspective is out of synch, BZ, that’s all. You need a good meal and a lot of sleep, and time to believe you’re back in the world you belong to.”

“Don’t patronize me!” He hit the instrument tray, things leaped and glittered. Jerusha winced. “I know where I am, and I don’t belong here any more! I’m not fit to be a police inspector, I’m not fit to belong to the human race. All I want is to keep the one promise I’m still capable of keeping, to the one person who doesn’t give a damn what I’ve become. And now you’re trying to tell me she’s a monster; and that I have to keep her from the one thing she wants when it’s almost in her hands!”

“I’m telling you it’s your duty as a police officer to protect the Hegemony! That has to come first. You can’t start bending the law to fit your personal tastes. It doesn’t work that way.” I should know.

“Then I resign.”

“I don’t accept your resignation. You’re in no state to offer it — and you’re too valuable to me. I need every man I’ve got until that final ship goes up.” She knew as she spoke that there was infinitely more at stake: a career, a man’s self-respect, maybe even his life. “Listen to me; please, BZ. You know I wouldn’t have told you all this unless I believed it. Arienrhod is a threat!” And a monster and a disease. “She’s a danger to the Hegemony, and that makes Moon a danger,” whatever she is. “And Starbuck is a vicious murderer, who’s killed whatever Sparks Dawntreader once was as surely as he’s killed a thousand mers. Think, Gundhalinu, think about it! You’re still a good officer — you can’t deny that you’re neglecting your duty. And you’re not doing Moon a favor to turn her over to them.” Reason began to seep back into Gundhalinu’s eyes, and a dark resolve. Stay with me, BZ.

Moon reappeared in the doorway, looking back over her shoulder, her face pinched with frustration and disappointment. Beyond her, Sirus was leaving the outer room. Damn, not when I’ve almost won! Jerusha turned back to Gundhalinu, saw with abrupt relief that his expression had not changed. “BZ,” she whispered, “you don’t have to be the one. I’ll have her taken in by someone else. Stay here until they’ve treated you. You need rest and—”

“I’ll do it.” He spoke as though she did not exist. He pushed bun self off of the table, stood down unsteadily, gathering himself to his duty. “They’ve already treated me, Commander. I’m fine,” absently. “I have to do this; have to do it now, before I change my mind.” His freckles stood out like stars, anemic white against the darkness of his skin.

Moon looked at him, stopped where she was across the room.

“BZ?”

Gundhalinu said quietly, “Moon, you’re under arrest.”

Moon huddled at the very edge of the seat, pressed against the curving window, as the shuttle car began to move soundlessly out of the star port station. There was a handful of other people in the car, I mainly technicians going off duty, going to join the Festival crowds I in the city. Carbuncle — she had reached the end of the journey that I had taken so long, and cost so much. She looked ahead into the sucking blackness through a progression of pulsing golden rings, I blinking each time the car threaded a ring like a silent needle… blinking and blinking, to keep her vision clear. Betrayed. Betrayed…