Al Steiner: Doing It All Over

"Now we've been discussing the circulatory system for several days now." She said at one point. "So can anyone tell me the complete route a blood cell takes through this system?"

Obviously she was expecting no hands to go up. It was almost, but not quite, a rhetorical question. She was met with blank looks from her class of thirty or so until I, deciding to have a little fun, put up my hand.

"Yes Billy?" She asked impatiently. "Do you need to use the restroom?"

I smiled at her shyly. I knew she was expecting nothing from me beyond that. I'd flunked her class. "No." I told her. "I was going to answer your question."

Her eyebrows went up. "YOU know the route a blood cell takes through the circulatory system?"

The class was looking at me now, obviously expecting me to make a joke of some sort, although I was not even known for that sort of behavior.

"I think so." I said softly.

She gave a patronizing smile. "Well do tell." She said.

"Okay," I began. "Why don't we start with an oxygenated cell as it leaves the heart. Is that a good starting place?"

She raised her eyebrows higher. "Sure." She finally said.

I nodded. "Okay. An oxygenated cell will be pumped from the left ventricle, through the aortic valve, into the Aorta, which will then branch into the descending and ascending Aortas. Of course at this point it may be sent to the coronary arteries but let us assume for the sake of discussion that it is not. From the aorta the cell will be pumped through the arteries into the arterioles and finally into a capillary bed somewhere where it will then give up it's oxygen molecule to a cell and pick up a carbon dioxide molecule for transport back to the lungs. At the point of transfer the capillaries will become veinuels. The cell will pass through these into veins, eventually making its way to either the superior or inferior vena cava, depending upon what part of the body it just oxygenated."

Mrs. Crookshank was obviously in shock, as if she'd seen a monkey suddenly start to talk. "Go on." She said numbly.

I nodded. "The vena cava lead, of course, to the heart. Specifically the right atria. The cell will enter the right atria and will then be pumped to the right ventricle. From there the cell will be pumped through the pulmonary valve to the pulmonary artery, which, I might add, is the only artery in the body to carry unoxygenated blood. The pulmonary artery will take the cell into the pulmonary capillary system where it will drop off its CO2 molecule, which will then be exhaled by the lung, and pick up another oxygen molecule from the alveoli in the lung. From there the now oxygenated cell with pass through the pulmonary vein, the only vein in the body that carries oxygenated blood, to the left atria. The left atria will pump the cell into the left ventricle and the process starts all over." I smiled. "Takes a little over a minute I hear."

The class was completely silent, staring at me. Finally Mrs. Crookshank spoke. "That's exactly right Billy." She said. "Very good."

"I read a little bit on it." I said, casting my eyes back to my desk.

At lunchtime it became quickly apparent that I'd altered history, as it was, a little already. As I waited in the snack bar line, and as I found an empty seat on the quad, I could see that people were pointing at me and looking at me. When I would turn to look at them, they would cast their eyes away. I figured the word had spread about my fight with Richie. People were probably in disbelief. I could almost hear the conversations they were having. Him? That little wimpy guy? Kicked Richie's ass? Sent him to the hospital? How? Does he know karate or something? He must!

I didn't mind. Obviously the word on the fight had not leaked to the wrong set of ears. If it had, I probably would have been pulled into the principal's office to talk to the cops. After all, what I'd done was felony assault. Not that I was worried about that either. Would the cops really believe that I'd done such a thing?

Finally someone came over to ask me about it. It was one of the hard- core stoner crowd; a group that I'd sometimes hung out with but had never really been a part of. I remembered smoking grass with the guy, who was a junior, on occasion, but I couldn't remember his name. He had long, unkempt black hair and the beginnings of a mustache on his lip. I wondered if he knew how ridiculous it looked. He approached carefully, as if I might suddenly lash out at him.

"What's up dude?" He asked me.

I shrugged. "Not much. What's up with you?"

"Nothin'." He paused. "I heard you got in a fight with Richie Fairview today."

"You could say that." I agreed.

"I heard you put him in the hospital."

"Wouldn't know about that." I replied. "But I doubt he'll be rippin' off people for a while." I smiled. "And if he does decide to go back into business, he might just think twice about who he fucks with."

The stoner who's name I couldn't remember grinned. "You know karate or somethin'?"

I shook my head. "Nope. Just a little about psychology and life."

His eyes widened. "Trippy." He finally said, reminding me of a phrase I hadn't heard in a while. "Listen, me and Raisin and Debbie are gonna blow this scene and head over to Raisin's house. Smoke some buds and listen to some AC\DC. You wanna come with us?"

I didn't have the slightest idea who Raisin might be, but I knew who Debbie was, even without a last name supplied. She was a cute, though skanky redhead that hung out with the stoners. She always kept close to whomever possessed the little baggie, hanging all over them and flirting with them. But, if I remembered correctly, she very rarely gave up any pussy. The polite term for her would be cock-tease. And no matter how many times they failed to get laid by her, they still fell for it every time. Thinking of her made my dick stir a little in my pants again. She was older than I was, sure, but I was definitely more experienced. Could I seduce her? And even if I couldn't, the thought of smoking a little grass was appealing in and of itself. As a paramedic we were drug tested. I hadn't smoked any pot in the last seven years.

"I'm in." I told him, standing up and throwing the remains of my burrito in the nearest garbage can.

Apparently Raisin was the one with the pot. I remembered him when I saw him. He was a short, bleached blonde who, like many short people, had adapted humor as his defense. He was one funny motherfucker. We climbed into his car; an early seventies Ford Falcon. My as-yet- unnamed friend and I climbed in the back. Debby climbed in the front with Raisin, who was looking real hopeful about his chances.

As he screeched out of the school parking lot Debbie giggled. "Fire up a joint NOW Raisin." She said. "C'mon. Getting stoned always get me horny."

"Can't Baby." Raisin replied, turning a corner at near-suicidal speed. "Don't have any rolled yet. Just hold your titties for a few. We have to get some papers."

She feigned a pout at his words and I took a moment to appraise her. She really was pretty good looking in a future trailer trash sort of way. Her red hair appeared natural, her tits firm and jiggly. As was the style of the eighties, she had on too much make-up. But I felt I could live with that. She was a sixteen-year-old girl, fresh no matter how skanky she appeared. I was determined to bag her. I thought I knew how.

Raisin pulled the Falcon into the parking lot of a gas station/convenience store. He backed into a spot near the back corner.

"Okay, here's the deal." Raisin told my back seat companion and me. "Bill, how much money you got?"

I shrugged. "About three bucks or so."

"Good." Raisin said. "You go up to the counter and buy a candy bar or something. Lonnie," He turned to my now-named companion. "While he's got the clerk distracted, you swipe a pack of papers from the display."