Jack Benjamin - The Paths Of Incest

I taught him right then, how to use his tongue and fingers to make me come, and for weeks, that's all we did-the oral way. I wanted him to put it in, but he was afraid. He said it was wrong, because he'd heard in Sunday School that it was bad and sinful to do it to a girl unless she was his wife. In his childish thinking, because nothing had been mentioned about sucking, he didn't think that was sinful. But he gave in one night when we were in bed. We'd sixty-nined and played with each other and he was all hot again. I told him to just put the head of it between my legs, and rub it against my thighs. He didn't want to, but once he'd started, I took over and slid it inside me. Once he'd plunged it all the way, he gave a gasp and got right on top of me, and from there on he was all man. He was like Ben-gentle, but good and strong. When he learned how to find the exact spots inside me and to massage my anus with his finger, he was a perfect lover.

Davey never was good in school, and he quit when he was 15 and worked the farm. We lived like lovers, and in most ways, Davey was a real man. I doubt if anyone ever suspected that we were actually lovers, mother and son. He got so, after awhile, he could just come in the house, kiss me with his tongue working inside my mouth, and put his hand on my slit, and I'd have an orgasm.

He was drafted when he was 18, in spite of us trying to prove that he was the sole support of the place, and did all the work of the head of the household. I begged old Eggers, the draft board head, but it was no use. I even tried to offer the old bastard some screwing, but he wouldn't budge.

When Davey went away, I was lost. I felt just like I had when Ben left, and when the one twin had drowned-like I'd lost a lover, or "a husband. I felt a lot worse than when Joe had died. I didn't know what to do. I was still young, still sexy as hell, and I didn't want the clumsy farmhands like Joe messing around with me. I wanted a young, eager, appreciative boy-one that would consider me-try to please me. I tried to get some young fellows to work at the place, but the young men were all going into the army, or else they were leaving and taking better jobs in the city. All that were left in the Pennsylvania hills were older men, and the ass-chasing married men who just wanted a quick piece. I finally had to hire an old man, but he was a drifter and a boozer, and he lasted less than a month. He didn't even look at me as a woman, even if I had wanted anything to do with him.

Then I got an idea. I started to teach a Sunday school class of boys, about ten to twelve. There was this one boy especially, a big dark-eyed boy with curly blonde hair, like Davey's, and I started to ask him to come out and help me with little things. I didn't dare to try anything at first, until he gained confidence in me, but I often would wear a short skirt when he was there, and no panties, and it was easy to show him a lot of hungry pussy. He never let on, though, if he was excited by it. One day, we were cleaning out a shed and he got really dirty, so I told him he ought to take a bath before he went home. I filled the tub and helped him undress, just as if it were the natural thing to do. I rubbed him with soap, and when I began to stroke his dinker, it got hard and beautiful. I rinsed him off, then took it in my mouth and made him come. He really got with it then, and I got undressed and we really went all out. He knew more than he had pretended, I found out. But we were so carried away that we didn't hear his father drive up to take him home. When the old boy walked in, Lester was on top of me and we were sixty-nining like crazy.

I had to leave town. The boy's father spread it all over town, and believe it or not, two days later, they brought out a petition with over two hundred names on it, telling me to leave. I sold the place and came to California, where I took a job as a housekeeper in a children's home. You know the rest.

"The rest" as she put it, was that she became involved with three of the boys in the home, was found out and charged with molestation and contributing to the delinquency of minors. She served ninety days, and was then paroled on the condition that she seek professional help and that she never again try to work around children.

When she came to the therapist, Myra was a pitiful thing. She was sex-starved, thin, slatternly. She sincerely wanted help, but she was still a child in her sexual nature. She felt that unless she could find a substitute for Ben, then for her son, David, she could never enjoy sex with a man again. She just didn't like full-grown men. After a few weeks of psycho-therapy, Myra revealed that she was in love-wildly, joyously in love. She even brought her new love to meet the psychologist. To his horrified astonishment, Myra introduced him to a boyish-bobbed, masculine attired lesbian! That the woman looked like a young boy was undeniable.

Questioned about this sex relationship, Myra seemed ecstatic, raving about the tenderness and fullness of sex with Edith, and her delighted surprise at the enjoyment she got from a dildo used by her lover. (A dildo is a mechanical contrivance shaped like a penis, which is strapped to a female's hips, and inserted into the vagina of her sex partner. Many are ingeniously made of pliant, semi-hard material which can be manipulated to simulate the movements and the hardness and resiliency of a male penis.)

Note: Several psychiatrists are of the opinion that brother-sister incest is a very common occurrence, particularly in poorer families where the living conditions cause sleeping in the same room. Others also believe that the isolated conditions of farm living tend to throw brothers and sisters into a stronger sex relationship. In the few cases which are open from beginning to end, a strong brother-sister incestuous affair, such as Myra's and Ben's, very often results in sex aberrations of a serious nature in later life, for one or both of the parties involved. As far as Myra knew, Ben was able to resume a normal, happy married life.

Myra's fixation for Ben, having been transferred to her son, David, became doubly serious for her. When her son was killed, Myra secretly gave up on her sex desires, feeling that he could never be replaced. She made foolish, futile efforts with other young boys. In fact, however, Myra would have had to bear a second son, and have raised him under the exact conditions as her David, if she were to have duplicated her sex robot son.

Perhaps the artificial world of lesbianism is the answer for a temporary happiness for Myra, but case histories tend to deny this. Where she will go, once the glitter has worn off her new female love, is problematical. Myra's sessions in which she spoke in complete honesty about her sexual desires, leaves one vital gap in this female-female sex relationship. Myra confessed several times that she truly enjoys fellating a young boy. Not to be frivolous, but in the newly-formed lesbian relationship, it is unlikely that she can satisfy this longing.

AUTHOR'S ADDENDUM: In keeping with the purpose of this book, the pertinent parts were submitted to or sent in condensed version to each party who agreed to allow their case history to be used. When Myra read hers, she had no objections whatsoever. But she returned the manuscript with the excited notation that she had broken off the lesbian relationship after she had met and fallen in love with a young man. She was, remember, 39. The young man to whom she claimed to have become engaged, was 17! Upon further questioning, she did admit that he was unemployed, and was a so-called "flower child." She discontinued her therapy, and when last heard from, had taken most of her money from the bank and had purchased a "camper" and headed for Colorado, where her latest love had convinced her, they would find Utopia.