Jack Benjamin - The Paths Of Incest

Myra was able to afford psychiatric treatment when her son, David, was killed in Viet Nam. She sold the small farm in Pennsylvania and came to California. Myra, though uneducated, had the shrewdness of a wild creature who has had to battle the elements and the land, as well as men, all her life. She was an excellent psychotherapy subject and strove mightily to apply the knowledge of her inner mind to her day-to-day living habits.

Myra's problem was her uncontrollable yen for young boys. She is a woman of 39, and, after she learned to use make-up and visit beauty parlors, and to dress decently, was a very attractive woman; especially in view of the hard life she led previously. In her own words, then:

My husband, Joe, knocked me up when I was 14. I'd been pregnant once before, but got rid of it. Virgins were rare in the hills of Pennsylvania, and Joe didn't make much fuss when he found I'd had other men and boys. I didn't tell him of course, that I'd lost my cherry to my own brother, nor that my daddy had had a slice of the cake a few times, too. But Joe did know about my Uncle Will getting into me when I was only ll. Everybody did, because my daddy caught him and beat the hell out of him, and Uncle Will left the county, 'cause my daddy swore he'd shoot him on sight.

Uncle Will was my daddy's youngest brother and he was only 15 then. We'd been raised together, and it just seemed natural to us, I guess, to be fooling around. We went swimming this day, and he dared me to go bare-assed. He dove under the water and began to put his fingers inside me. Later, we stretched out on a big rock, and he began to play with me again, until I got all hot. He came at me like I saw dogs do-all panting and humping, and I enjoyed it. We didn't get caught that day, but about a week later, he got me in the barn and daddy caught us. He used a horsewhip on Will, and he left. I don't know where he is now.

But, before that, my brother, Ben, had got to me-lots of times. We used to sleep in the same room, but in different beds. I slept with my younger sister who was only four, and Ben slept on a cot by himself. I was 10 when my breasts began to show-not much, but Ben spotted them right away and teased me about them. I used to undress right in front of him. I guess maybe I got kind of excited to think that my body was beginning to be good enough to attract a boy's attention, even my brother's. We had an outside toilet, and one day I walked in (the door was off it's hinges) and found Ben playing with his pecker. It was all hard and red, and he was jerking away, with his eyes closed, panting and having a real big time. I just watched him, and all at once, he shot a stream of watery-white juice-right out of the outhouse! I was fascinated and just stood there. He opened his eyes and saw me and he was mad. He stuffed it back in his pants and started screaming at me, called me a snoop-assed bitch. I ran for the house and up to my room. Daddy was out in the fields, and my sis was taking her nap.

I wasn't really scared, except I thought Ben was going to hit me, like he sometimes did. Instead, he just stood there, mad-like, and took his dinker out, pumping on it like crazy.

"You wanted to see it-take a good look!" he said. "Fact is, take a suck of it!" He threw me down on his bed, straddled me, and let it touch my lips. I kept them tight closed over my teeth, and he put his fingers at the back of my jaws and pushed hard until I opened my mouth. Then he plunged it in. At first, it gagged me, but then he began to be gentler, and I began to run my tongue around it. I enjoyed the look on his face, I guess. I was proud, in a funny way, that any boy would want me, like I was a grown woman. Then he came in my mouth. It was so far in, I couldn't do anything but swallow it. It was funny, the way Ben changed. He took it out, and began to kiss me and cry a little. He kissed me gentle at first, then began to stick his tongue in my mouth, while he put his hands inside my panties and began to massage my slit. I got all wet-like, and I even reached down and helped him shove his finger in deeper, so he hit the right spot. Without saying anything, he took my panties off, kissed my slit, running his tongue in, and then he got on top of me. I was a little scared, but I wanted him to put in his pecker. When he did, I went wild. I always heard that the first time was hell for a girl-and I was only 10-but it didn't hurt after that first thrust. I bled a little, and that scared Ben, but he kept on. After a while, I put my legs up around him, and he burst inside me, all hot and gooey. At the same time, I felt like a skyrocket or a Roman candle had shot off inside my cunt. I know now that I came, just a second or so before Ben did.

We did it again, and it was even better. Then Ben told me to "go wash out and pee good," so I wouldn't get pregnant. I hadn't begun to really menstruate yet, but Ben was scared. I did like he said, and he even helped me wash out inside me.

After that, me and Ben did it a lot, but when he put it in me, he always used a rubber, after that first time. When he'd get real hot, and wouldn't have a rubber, I'd suck it for him and he would do it for me, but we were careful not to get caught by daddy. That was how my Uncle Will came to screw me-he caught me and Ben, and he cornered me one day and said if I didn't do it for him, he'd tell my Pa about me and Ben.

I didn't like it with Will-not like with Ben. He was in too much of a hurry-scared, I guess, so that I didn't even come. I was afraid to tell Ben about it. Then daddy caught Will and drove him off.

It was about a week after that, that daddy sent Ben out of town for overnight, up to another uncle's place near Wilkesbarre. That night, daddy said he wanted to talk to me-in his room. I got ready for bed and made sure my sister was all right, and went in. Daddy was under the covers. I knew he always slept naked, and I wondered what he was going to do. Honestly, I didn't think he had anything about sex in mind.

"When Will stuck it into you, how did it feel? How did you feel?" he asked bluntly. I didn't know whether or not to he, so I told him the truth. I said it felt partly good, partly bad. "Did he come in you? You know what come is?" daddy asked. I told him that Will had come, but I didn't.

"Did you want to?" he asked. He had now put his arm around me and was feeling my little breasts, though I had started wearing a brassiere and my pubic hair was really growing.

He kissed me-hard-like, on the mouth. I didn't feel much of anything, except maybe a little fear. He slid my nightie off, and began to kiss my breasts. Meantime, the covers had slid off him and I could see his big, hard pecker. It was so much bigger than Will's or Ben's that it scared me; yet it fascinated me. I wondered what it would feel like inside me, after Ben's, which wasn't very big. Will wasn't very big, either-not like this one.

Then he moved down and began to stick his tongue into me, running it around the lips, then plunging it in. He began to masturbate, and I was getting all hot, so I took his hand off his dick, and I masturbated him. Then I turned around and crawled on top of him and sucked it, while he was going like wild in me with his tongue. After a minute, I came and he couldn't stop himself. I just swallowed it, then kept on sucking until he got another good stiff on. He was like an animal when he mounted me, and it hurt a little, even if I had been getting regular screwing from Ben. But I came, and he kept on and came twice in me. He kept saying as he sucked my tongue and kissed my titties, "You're way better'n Millie ever was-way better." I came once after that while he was kissing my slit. Then he began to feel guilty, and he begged me, then ordered me, not to tell Ben-or anyone.

After that, I had Ben a couple times a week, and my daddy maybe once or twice a month. Daddy was scared I'd get pregnant, and he used to pull out, just before he came. This wasn't much good for me, so I tried to come quick. With Ben, it was different-a lot better. We used to go all night, when we didn't have to get up next morning. We never did get caught, although Ben walked in one night and caught me and daddy. It made him mad. He hated my Pa from that moment on, with a deadly hate. When I got pregnant with Joe, Ben left. My Pa took out after Joe and made us get married. I hated Joe, sex-wise. He was just a clod-him on top, me underneath-he never cared about me corning, just so he got his rocks off. Joe screwed the hell out of me right up until two days before Davey was born. By that time, I had come to dread sex with him. Once, I even had Pa, when I was over visiting, but he was drunk, and no good for either one of us.