Dorsai - Jan

"What's that?"

"That you really don't care whether you've made love with us, or not – that you really do still love us and care about us, anyway. I *know* that you'll treat me the same way, whether I want to make love with you, or not, and that you'll still care about me and love me."

"Of course I would, Candice.", I responded, mildly surprised.

"Well, I wanted to ask you if you could, uh, make love with me – but without actually, um, being inside me, you know? I know that you love me and care about me, and I feel the same way about you as the others – well, mostly, anyway. I mean, I feel the same things about you, but probably just not as much. From what all the others have said, I know I can trust you not to do that part of it, but I still want to find out what the rest of it is like – if you'll help me learn. I want to learn what it's like to be that close to someone, and share myself with them, and them, me."

I looked at her intently, and asked "Are you sure, Candice?"

She looked back at me, with confidence, and in a steady voice answered "Yes, I'm sure. I don't think I've been more sure of anything in my life!"

"In that case, then, yes, I'll do it.", I responded.

"Uh, could we do it today? I don't mean right now, 'cause I still want to be with the rest of them before they have to go home today, but later? Maybe this afternoon?"

"Whenever you want, Candice. There's no hurry – but you probably know that, already."

She smiled, and said "Yeah, I do. But it's still nice to hear it from you."

We sat there for a few moments, looking at each other before she kind of shook herself, and said "Well, I'd better get in there and help clean things up." before gracing me with another smile. and standing up.

A few moments after she got into the kitchen, I thought I heard a flurry of whispering, but couldn't be sure. Following that, there were the occasional noises of things being put away and the dishwasher being loaded.

A few minutes later, the group of them trooped back into the den. Susan didn't hesitate to sit down next to me, as did Candice. The others distributed themselves around the room. I turned the TV off at Kelly's request, and we spent the rest of the morning in quiet conversation. I say 'we', but it was mostly them, with only occasional input or observations from me when I was directly spoken to. As the time passed, Susan and Candice each snuggled closer, pulling an arm around themselves, and even holding my hand on a breast. None of the others seemed to take the slightest notice, seeming to accept it as the right of anyone next to me to have my touch.

By lunch time, they'd pretty much talked themselves out, and were happy to simply sit and enjoy each other's company and friendship. As two o'clock approached, it was Susan who finally pointed out that she still needed to get home – accompanied by a number of small groans of complaint. None the less, she got up, saying that her dad would be coming to get her, and had to get dressed. She went into the bedroom, and when she came out, was dressed in the clothes she'd brought, and had her small bag loaded with the clothing she'd worn when she got there.

That seemed to prod Sandra and Robyn, as well, who asked if Susan's dad could drop them off, too. Susan agreed, and the two of them went off to dress, as well. While they were gone, I asked Susan to give her father a message – "Just tell him that what he was worried about turned out not to be a problem."; she assured me that she'd pass it along. When Sandra and Robyn got back, all of them started talking again, making plans for some event or other, until Mabel announced that there was someone at the door. The TV revealed it to be Susan's dad, and the three of them headed for the door. We heard the brief conversation as Susan asked her dad to give Robyn and Sandra rides, and he said he would, before we heard the door close.

That left just the four of us there, before Jan reminded Kelly that they had a report to write for one of their classes, and suggested that they go to the library to research it. Kelly agreed, and told Candice she was welcome to join them, or stay with me, whichever she wanted. Candice blushed ever so slightly, and said she'd stay, if they didn't mind. Both assured her it was fine, and went back to get dressed.

A few minutes later, we heard them chatting as they came out and headed for the garage. Moments later, we heard the faint sounds of a car starting, then driving off.

Finally completely alone, Candice and I sat there on the couch, snuggling a few minutes before she finally sat up. I looked at her, and smiled, saying "I take it there's something on your mind that you want to do?"

She grinned, nervously, and said "Yeah, there is. Very much."

"And what is that?", I teased.

"I want to make love with you." she answered, confidently.

I patted my lap, indicating I wanted her to sit on it. She moved to do so, and after only the slightest hesitation, put her knees on each side of my hips before planting her butt on my lap.

I reached out to put my arms around her hips, but she was far enough away that I couldn't quite hold my hands together. Realizing the problem, she scooted herself forward a bit, until I could hold her, my fingers interlaced at her back.

She put her hands on my chest, and looked into my eyes as I told her "We can do this, or not – it's up to you. If you want us to, we can do it now, tomorrow, next month, or next year – there's no hurry. You can stop it, at any time, by just telling me 'no'. If you do, I'll stop doing whatever I'm doing, right then – with no hesitation, no muss, no fuss.

You told me that you don't want me inside you, and that's fine: how far we go, how much or how little we do together, is your choice, not mine.

What we do, if anything, and how we do it is for you to decide. For that, I'll be needing your help. If I start to do something you're not comfortable with, let me know. If I start to do something that you don't like, let me know. I am not knowingly going to do anything that might hurt you – but if I do, tell me, so I can stop. Okay?"

She nodded solemnly, and said "I know you won't do anything to hurt me, or try to push me to do something I don't want – that's part of what makes me want to do this. And I really do want to do it."

I smiled in answer, and went on "By the same token, if I do something you DO like, it will help if you can let me know that, too. I'll probably figure it out, anyway, sooner or later; but if you let me know sooner, it's better for both of us, right? If there's something you want me to do, don't be afraid to tell me. I seriously doubt that you could come up with anything I haven't at least heard about before" – she grinned at that -"and if that's what you want, then I'll do my best. You don't have to worry about anything that happens between us, or with you – you know that Kelly lives with me, and that we make love, so there's not going to be anything happen with your body that I don't know about – unless, of course, you're from Mars, or something."

The last bit got me another grin, and she said "No, I'm not from Mars.

And I know that I don't have to be ashamed or embarrassed about getting wet, or making noise or anything like that. One thing that all of them agreed on – well, one of several things! – is that you're always a gentleman about stuff like that. But it wouldn't matter, anyway, because I want to KNOW you, and learn about this stuff, and if things get messy or noisy, then that's just too bad, cause that's part of it, too – at least, for me."

We sat there, looking into each other's eyes as we established a bond with each other, and got on the same 'wavelength'.

After a bit, she leaned forward, and kissed me on the lips – barely touching me. She watched me a few moments; when I simply looked at her, and didn't move, did it again, more firmly and longer, before sitting up again.