Рейчел Уэллс - Alfie And George

He looked pleased with himself as he downed the rest of his beer and stood up. I looked at him. Was he mad? Horses? Tiger? I might be heartbroken but Jonathan had lost the plot. If I could talk to humans I would have had a lot of questions to ask him. Instead, I put my head down, even more exhausted than before.

Claire came into the room.

‘Oh, there you are.’ She came up to Jonathan and kissed him.‘How did it go?’ she asked.

‘Yeah, I think I got through to him,’ he said as I lay down on the sofa and curled myself up into a ball.

‘Really? He still looks sad,’ Claire pointed out.

‘Give him a bit of time. We had a chat, like you asked me to. You know — man to cat. It’s all good.’

As they both left the room, Claire looked back at me — she clearly wasn’t convinced. But then again, neither was I.

After a short catnap, I got up and greeted my other families. Although the adults could deal with my heartache, I knew the children couldn’t, especially my first-ever child friend, Aleksy, who was nearly eleven now and had always been a sensitive boy. He would hate to see me sad. Little Tomasz, who wasn’t so little, nearly as big as Aleksy despite being three years younger, was more of a physical child, and he didn’t really pick up on emotions. Polly and Matt’s children, Henry, who was almost five, and three-year-old Martha, were too young to understand my pain. As I played with them, mainly with a ball and ribbons, I made a huge effort. It wasn’t easy, but to see my friends smiling and hear them laugh was a tonic. I made a special fuss of all the children, especially Aleksy, and it did cheer me up just a tiny little bit. It was lovely to be surrounded by the love of my families. Having all of them there was such a treat, and I just about managed to be like the old me for a short while.

My families got together frequently. Polly and Matt lived on the same street and I often spent time at their house, where they had been kind enough to install a cat flap for me. Frankie and Tomasz lived a few streets away, above the restaurant they owned. The restaurant food was delicious.

Talking of food, I was distracted by the smell of it. Tomasz had brought a feast from his restaurant for everyone and he’d brought me sardines which, even though my appetite wasn’t quite what it normally was, were quite welcome. I tried my best to appreciate the food and count my blessings, although it wasn’t easy. Nothing at the moment was easy — it was as if my paws were stuck in mud.

‘So how is Alfie?’ Franceska asked Claire. I could hear them, as they had a habit of talking in front of me as if I didn’t understand. They did the same with the younger children.

‘Sad. He seems sad. He’s been off his food and he’s barely been out. I know he’ll recover but it’s heartbreaking,’ Claire said. She liked to read books, and lately she had been reading classic romances, which seemed to have made her even softer than normal.‘I just feel so terrible for him, to love and then to lose. We’ve all been there, haven’t we?’

‘He’ll be fine,’ Jonathan cut in. ‘He’s a man, he’ll soon bounce back.’

‘Typical male point of view,’ Polly added.

‘I’m sure Jon’s right. He’ll soon be his old self,’ said Matt.

‘Hey, why doesn’t he come and stay with us for a couple of days,’ big Tomasz suggested.‘A change of scene might help.’

‘That’s not a bad idea,’ Claire said.‘Maybe next weekend?’

I gave up eating and curled up by Franceska’s feet, nestling into her legs. A weekend away wouldn’t solve my problems, but it would be nice to be with them all and it would mean I wouldn’t have to look at the empty house next door. Plus, I’d have the boys to keep me occupied and I’d get to spend time with my cat friend Dustbin. I felt something akin to hope for the first time since I had heard that Snowball was leaving.

‘Yeah, can he come?’ Aleksy said, sounding excited. It seemed it was all settled. I would take my broken heart away for the weekend.

That night, I was thinking about my weekend away when I heard Jonathan and Claire arguing. It was a funny kind of argument though, because ever since Summer was born, they rowed in whispered voices. I was worried. After all, whilst I had enough problems of my own, I didn’t want anyone else to be unhappy — I wasn’t sure I could bear it. I crept closer to their room to listen.

‘Look, we can get a second opinion,’ I heard Jonathan say.

‘You mean a third opinion. Jon, I am trying to tell you, it’s pointless, and it’s time we faced facts. I’m OK, really. We were lucky with Summer, but there aren’t going to be any more babies. I’m sorry I can’t give you another child but at least we have her.’

‘I know, we’ve got Summer and Alfie … It’s fine, as long as you’re all right. I mean … OK, yes, I would ideally love another child but it’s more important that our family — you, me, Sum and Alfie — are all right. I love you.’ I felt a bit relieved, it seemed they weren’t really arguing after all.

‘No, I’m fine. Please don’t worry, this isn’t going to send me back to my black days, it really isn’t. I’m disappointed, but I think deep down I knew, the tests just confirmed it.’ Claire did have dark moments, which made us all worry terribly, but it was only when things went wrong. She seemed to be coping with life so much better these days — there was no doubt that Jonathan and Summer had brought great joy into her life. It was if they had taught her how to be happy.

‘So we’re OK? Then why are we arguing?’

‘I don’t know.’ I saw Claire sit down on the bed.‘Jonathan, I don’t want Summer to be an only child.’

‘But you just said you were OK?’

‘I am, but that doesn’t mean we can’t adopt. There are so many children out there who need a good, loving home. We’ve got all that and more. We have space, we can afford it …’

‘I don’t know.’ I could hear the doubt in Jonathan’s voice.

‘But why not?’

‘Because.’ I could almost hear Jonathan folding his arms across his chest. He could be such a child sometimes.

‘Because why, darling?’ I saw through a crack in the door that Claire had put her arm on his.

‘It’s complicated. I just think it’s a big step, taking in someone else’s child. And then the adoption process is gruelling, we might not even be accepted.’

‘Oh, Jon, I’m sure we will, I’ve spoken to Dad … We might not get a baby, but I know that they are crying out for homes for older children. We’re not criminals or insane …’ She attempted a laugh.

‘I’m not so sure. I mean about adopting, not being a criminal. Or insane.’

‘OK, but will you at least agree to let me look into it?’ I heard Claire’s pleading voice and then Jonathan’s sigh.

‘If you really have your heart set on it then we can look into it, but I’m not promising anything.’

‘Hey, like you said, we might not even be accepted, but at least let me find out. I don’t want to wonder about it, that’s all.’

‘Hey, I’d be more agreeable to you adopting a new girlfriend for Alfie,’ Jonathan joked. He often did this when he was uncomfortable, tried to make a joke. A pretty poor joke, in my opinion.

‘Jon, that’s not funny. But now you mention it …’

‘I was joking,’ he said.

‘I know you were. OK, let’s go to bed.’ As I saw them settle down for the night, I went back to my basket, thankful that everything was fine and there was nothing to worry about. Apart from myself of course.

‘So you’ve never been in love?’ I asked. I was in the small yard behind the restaurant with Dustbin. Dustbin was my friend and the cat who sort of worked for Tomasz’s restaurant. He was what he referred to as feral; he had never lived in a house before and liked it that way. He lived in the yard outside the restaurant and Franceska and big Tomasz’s flat and he kept the vermin under control. We’d known each other since I had started visiting here and he was also one of the wisest cats I’d ever met.