John Gray: Children Are from Heaven: Positive Parenting Skills for Raising Cooperative, Confident, and Compassionate Children

Children cannot grow strong if everything is too easy.

Children cannot accept their imperfections if they haven’t had many opportunities to forgive their parents for their mistakes and imperfections.

By giving your children the freedom to discover and express their true selves, you give them the gifts of greatness. All great individuals, thinkers, artists, scientists, and leaders in history were able to say no to past conventions and to think creatively. They had dreams and were able to follow their dreams. When others opposed them or did not believe in them, they had the strength to believe in themselves.

Greatness is always forged through opposition. Every success story is filled with examples of having to push ahead against others. By means of the process of saying no to others or resisting common ways of thinking and not blindly conforming, creativity and greatness can emerge.

Each of the five messages of positive parenting supports the development of a strong sense of self and contains a special gift of greatness. They are:

1.Permission to be different, which enables children to discover, appreciate, and develop their unique inner potential and purpose.

2.Permission to make mistakes, which enables children to self-correct, learn from their mistakes, and achieve greater success.

3.Permission to express negative emotions, which teaches children to manage their emotions and develop a feeling awareness that makes them more confident, compassionate, and cooperative.

4.Permission to want more, which helps children develop a healthy sense of what they deserve and the skill of delayed gratification. They are able to want more, and yet be happy with what they have.

5.Permission to say no, which enables children to exercise their will and to define a true and positive sense of self.

This freedom strengthens children’s mind, heart, and will and develops a greater awareness of what they want, feel, and think. This permission to resist authority is at the basis of all the positive-parenting skills.

I hope this practical parenting guide helps you be the best leader for your children. Being a parent is difficult, but as we all know it is the most rewarding job one can have. To make your job easier, seek out the support of other parents who are also using positive-parenting skills.

Let this guide help you on your journey. May your children grow up confident, cooperative, and compassionate.

May they be successful in both the outer world and their inner world. May their material dreams come true, and may they always experience lasting love in their family and friendships.

J o h n G r a y , P h . D., an internationally recognized expert in the fields of communication and relationships, and author of twelve bestsellers, has been conducting personal growth seminars for thirty years. He is a Certified Family Therapist (National Academy for

Certified Therapists), a consulting editor of The Family Journal, a member of the Distinguished Advisory Board of the International Association of Marriage and Family Counselors, and a member of the American Counseling Association. John lives with his wife and three children in northern California.

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CHILDREN ARE FROM HEAVEN. Copyright © 1999 by Mars Productions, Inc. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

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