Lynda Plante - Sleeping Cruelty

William pushed back his chair and crossed to Justin. He held out his arms and Justin’s bravado evaporated. Like a small boy, he went to William and clung to him, sobs shaking his body. William held him tightly, soothing him, letting him weep until he was silent.

The thoughts that zigzagged through William’s mind made it difficult for him to remain calm. What Justin had said was shocking, yet he had suspected it all along, suspected and been afraid of it since he had talked to Marta at the villa. But it did not feel as if he was holding a killer in his arms, only a wounded boy whose suffering had obsessed him.

‘You’re the only friend I have ever had in my life,’ Justin whispered. He rested his head against William’s shoulder. ‘Sometimes I feel like I am insane. But the need to hurt those who tortured me and Laura would never go away. I had to do it, William, otherwise I would have gone crazy, like Laura.’

William led him back to the table and sat him down. He patted his shoulder, then used a napkin to wipe his tears. ‘How much a part of it is Laura?’

‘Oh, nothing but the planning. We planned everything together. We’re not just brother and sister. We’re lovers. We could only ever trust each other, you see? Can you understand what we became to each other? We were each other’s parents. We were all we dared to love because everyone else seemed intent on destroying us, and the more pain we experienced, the more we were drawn together. Only by being so close could we protect each other.’

William returned to his seat. His mind was in turmoil as he tried to assimilate the terrible things Justin had just told him. But he knew he must not allow Justin to see how affected he was by the truth.

Justin drained his champagne. ‘You’re confusing me,’ he said softly. In the candlelight his face was astonishingly beautiful, his high cheekbones shadowed, his jaw-line chiselled and his eyes glittering like azure stones.

William turned away on the pretext of pouring more champagne. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t intend to... er, confuse you. I’m trying to be as honest as I can. You’ve helped change my life. Now I want to help you straighten out yours. After what you’ve told me...’

‘What if it’s too late?’ Justin said.

‘It’s never too late. Look at what you did for me. And I’m not just referring to making me lose my gut. It’s what you did for me up here,’ William said, tapping his head.

‘But what if my confessions repel you, frighten you? You may betray me out of fear.’

William kept his gaze steady. ‘I will never betray you, Justin, and I mean it. This island will be a safe place. Do you understand what I’m saying? No one can get to you, or harm you or Laura. I will protect you both.’

‘Does that mean you can forgive me and forget what I have done?’

William watched as a multitude of emotions played across Justin’s handsome face. ‘No one is aware of what you have done. Unless they are told or the police reinvestigate Maynard’s suicide, they probably never will be.’

‘Unless you tell them. You see what I’ve just done? I’ve put my life in your hands.’

‘I have promised that I will protect you.’

‘Why? What makes you want to do that? Or, for that matter, what will stop me killing you? Now that I know you know, and you are the only one apart from Laura who does, what do you think will stop me killing you?’

William met Justin’s eyes, and this time he didn’t look away. ‘Because I love you, and you have made a difference to my life. I am prepared to—’

‘Be my lover?’

‘ No! Stop that! I am offering to be... like a father to you.’

‘My father is dead,’ Justin said. Suddenly he stood up and his chair fell behind him. ‘Just give me Laura’s diamonds, the ones you promised, and we’ll both leave. I don’t want to hear any more crap from you. You’ve had too much to drink.’

William stood up too. ‘The diamonds are under your sister’s pillow.’ He noticed this freaked Justin. He continued, ‘I’ve also destroyed the tapes. You will never be able to use them against anyone.’

‘Oh, I see. So you want to destroy me next,’ Justin snarled.

‘No, I don’t. You’ve not been listening to what I’ve been saying. I’m offering—’

‘What the fuck do you want from me? What do you expect me to say to you? Do you want to keep me here like some fucking plaything? What’s happened, Willy? You still afraid to come out of your closet? Why don’t you admit it now? Go on, look at me. Tell me you want me to fuck you. Do you think that’s what I want? You? With your wispy hair and flaccid belly? I don’t want you near me, you repel me, and this bullshit about protecting me is all for one reason. You want my body just like that prick Maynard did.’

William hit him hard across the face. Justin stumbled to one side then laughed and started to give William a slow handclap. Then he glared and became the waspish, lisping man Laura and William hated. ‘Well, well, how the worm turns!’

‘What did I say that was so bad, Justin?’ William was not going to be drawn into a shouting match.

Justin pushed his face forward so that he was almost nose to nose with William. ‘You wiped my precious tapes. I needed them. You’re a liar and a two-faced bastard. And you, Willy-boy, are not my father. If you were you’d have a knife stuck in your chest. As it is, if you keep me prisoner on this island you’ll never be safe. I’ll hurl your body off Suicide Point. Just another accident.’

‘You wouldn’t do that to me.’

‘You want to bet?’

Justin turned and walked out, knocking aside the waiter as he carried in their tray. The dishes crashed to the floor but Justin did not turn back. William sat up and shook out his napkin, anything to stop his running after Justin. He had just seen the madness in him, the killer, and it scared him. Whatever he had dreamed up about being a fatherly figure to that wild creature was insanity, and he knew it. But he did not want to back away. He had come to see Justin and to explain himself. But explain what? The reality was that he was in love with Justin. He wanted that love reciprocated, and for a moment when they had embraced, he had felt sure that it was. But instead of telling Justin this he had offered to be a substitute father, and Justin had snarled in his face. And he did want to lie naked beside him, to make love to him. He wouldn’t let Justin’s rejection alter the fact that he was still the most important person in his life, and he would stand by what he had offered: his protection.

William forced himself to eat his dinner. Each mouthful was hard to swallow, but he was not going to chase after Justin. He needed to cool off. They had to talk again.

Dahlia put her finger to her lips and pointed to the bed. Laura was propped up with pillows. Her hair had been combed and tied with a ribbon, and there was a plaster across the cut on her head. However, her eyes were clear and bright and her cheeks slightly flushed. She looked like a little girl. A square of black velvet lay across the white sheet. It was covered with sparkling diamonds.

‘She’s had a sedative,’ Dahlia whispered, gesturing for William to move to her side. ‘She doesn’t seem to know where she is.’ Dahlia showed William the tablets, vials and hypodermic needles in Laura’s medicine box. ‘Justin was here. He told me she sometimes reverts back to childhood. It takes time for her to readjust, he said. He also said—’ She faltered.

‘Said what?’

‘That in the past she had electro-convulsive therapy if she remained in her own world. But it was a last resort.’

William nodded then asked her to make him some coffee. As she left, he took her seat by the bed. ‘How are you feeling, Laura?’ he said softly.