Стюарт Вудс - Foul Play

“I hear you talked to Lance this weekend.”

“Jesus, is there anything you don’t know?”

“Not much.”

“Did Lance mention how bad everything is?”

“He did. What are you going to do?”

“If I survive until tomorrow, I’ll think about it then.”

“Sleep with a piece under your pillow.” Dino hung up.

Stone fell immediately asleep.

He was awakened by the dumbwaiter bell; breakfast was on the way. He looked at his watch. He had slept straight through the night, a good twelve hours, and he was still sore. He took some aspirin, ate his breakfast, watched Morning Joe , then read the Times and did the crossword. Afterward he showered, if only to keep from falling asleep again.

As he sat down at his desk, the phone rang. “Hello?”

“I’m feeling better,” Brooke said. “Dinner tonight.”

Stone hung up and tried to think of something else. The phone rang again, and he picked it up.

“You hung up on me!” she said hotly.

“I was just following instructions.”

She thought about that. “Oh.”

Stone hung up.

Joan came into his office. “Why do you keep picking up before I can get to it, then hanging up. Is some scam artist pestering you?”

“Something like that.”

“Let me deal with it, will you?”

“Okay, you do that.”

Joan went back to her office, and the phone rang again. Stone watched the light on the phone; it didn’t go out. Joan buzzed him.

“Yes?”

“There’s a Brooke Alley on one. Do you wish to speak to her?”

“Yes, but she has instructed me not to take her calls.”

“She instructed you not to answer?”

“That is correct.”

“Hang on.” She put him on hold.

Stone waited, watching the light on the phone. Joan buzzed.

“Yes?”

“She’s on the line, and she says she’s canceling her order for you to not speak to her.”

“I guess she can do that,” Stone said.

“I think she can.”

Stone picked up the phone. “You just want to get sore again, don’t you?”

“Well, I wouldn’t put it quite that way, but you’re getting the general idea.”

“Tell you what: I’ll call you when I’m not sore anymore.”

“That seems fair.”

“I’m glad you think so. Goodbye.” He hung up, then sat staring at the phone. When nothing happened, he went back to work.

Stone met Dino at Patroon. Dino was half a drink ahead. “Still sore?” he asked.

“Not so much.”

“Have you spoken to Brooke?”

“Several times.”

“So why aren’t you with her, instead of with me? I hope you’re not hoping something will happen between us.”

“I have never had that hope and never will.”

“You get horny enough... well, you never know.”

“I know.”

“Why haven’t the Russians killed you?”

“I don’t know. I was half expecting them to try.”

“I guess they think there’s no point rushing with you, when it’s Shep who has their money, and he’s not available to kill.”

“It wouldn’t make any sense to kill him. Then they’d have to deal with his estate, and that could be harder than dealing with him.”

“Who’s he leaving his money to?”

“I’ve no idea. He didn’t ask me to write a will for him, I assume he already has one.”

“Maybe Shep is smarter than we thought.”

“His old man, Rod, is smarter.”

“Than who?”

“Than any of us. You notice how he waited until he had gotten himself dead before he died? I mean, he set Shep up for this.”

“That would presume that Rod knew who he was dealing with,” Dino pointed out. “How would an old man who’d lived in western Massachusetts all his life know about the Russian mob?”

“That’s an extremely good question, Dino, and I wish I had an answer. It’s all very unlikely, isn’t it?”

“That’s what I was going to say.”

“Also, how did the dead hooker get into this?”

“I thought that was one of the cleverest features of this conundrum. Certainly, it was a good way to scare the shit out of Shep, to show him how they had no regard for human life.”

“Did you notice that he didn’t seem scared?” Stone asked.

“Yes, I did. If I’d been in his shoes, it would have scared the shit out of me.”

“Then Shep is a cooler customer than we’d figured,” Stone said. “Cooler than I, at least.”

“I’ll give you that.”

“Also, when Mike suggested we get him out of town, and I asked him if he owns real estate outside of the city or Massachusetts, he came up with the Vineyard instantly. And that setup is an extremely complicated set of circumstances.”

“Almost too good to be true,” Dino said.

“I’ve never found anything to be too good to be true,” Stone said. “Too good to believe, maybe, but not too good to be true.”

“I find that all the time,” Dino said.

“But you’re a cynic.”

“I’m a realist.”

“No, a cynic is somebody who thinks nothing is good enough to believe, until it’s been proved to him two or three times. That’s you.”

“You’re thinking too much,” Dino said. “You should give Brooke a call.”

“Why are you so interested in my relationship with Brooke?”

“Viv is anxious to know if you’re going to have one of those that lasts longer than last night.”

“Well, she’s just going to have to wait to find out, isn’t she? Just as Brooke and I have to wait to find out.”

“You’re not going to find out by sitting in a restaurant with me, are you?”

“We just need a little time to cool off before we go at it again.”

“I’ve never known you to need a time-out,” Dino said. “It worries me a little.”

“Don’t worry.”

“Just a little.”

“Not at all. Brooke and I will find each other again quite soon. We agreed to wait until the weekend.”

“I guess that’s not too much to ask.”

“It’s proving to be more than I had figured on,” Stone said.

“You’re not sore anymore?”

“More like itchy. A little. So is Brooke.”

“That sounds like the best of all possible worlds,” Dino said.

“It ain’t bad,” Stone said.

Stone’s cell phone rang.

“Hello?”

“It’s Brooke. Let’s have dinner.”

“Dino and I are at Patroon. Why don’t you join us?”

“Be right there.” She hung up.

“Don’t tell me,” Dino said. “That was Brooke, and she’s going to join us.”

“How’d you guess?”

“Because she just walked in the door,” Dino said, nodding in that direction.

Brooke walked over and slithered out of her fur coat, revealing an elegant black sheath dress with a knockout piece of diamond jewelry at her throat. “Do I have a drink yet?” she asked, shoehorning her way between Stone and Dino.

Stone waved at a waiter, and Brooke asked for a martini.

“Where did you call from?” he asked.

“From the entry vestibule,” she replied.

“How did you know where we were?” Dino asked.

“Your wife told me,” she replied, taking a big sip of her martini.

“Of course,” Dino replied. “I don’t know why I asked. Where is she?”

“On a plane to Mumbai,” Brooke said.

“Oh, yeah, I forgot.”

“May I see a menu, please?” Brooke asked.

A waiter materialized beside her.

“Who’ll share the chateaubriand?” she asked.

Both Stone and Dino raised a hand.

“It’s a dish for two,” she said. “If you like, I’ll back out and order something else.” She glanced at the menu. “The rack of lamb, please. And a Caesar salad.”