Харлан Кобен - Win

We learn, we evolve, we improve.

The sex tonight is great. It usually is. And when it’s not, it is still sex. There is an old joke about a man wearing a toupee — it may be a good toupee, it may be a bad toupee, but it is still a toupee. The same with sex. I’ve heard often that sex with a stranger is awkward. I’ve rarely found this to be the case. Part of this might be my expertise — the techniques I traveled the world to learn involve more than fighting — but the secret is simple: Be present. I make every woman feel as though she is the only one in the world. It is not an act. A woman will sense if you lack authenticity. While we are together, this woman and I, it is just us two. The world is gone. My focus is total.

I love sex. I have lots of it.

Myron waxes philosophical on how sex must be more than what it is — that love or romantic entanglement enhances the physical experience. I listen and wonder whether he is trying to convince me or himself. I don’t like love or romantic entanglements. I like sharing certain physical acts with another consensual adult. The other stuff doesn’t “enhance” sex for me. It sullies it. The act itself is pure. Why muddy that with the extraneous? Sex may be the greatest shared experience in the world. Yes, I enjoy going out for a gourmet meal or a good show or the company of dear friends. I appreciate golf and music and art.

But do any of those compare to an evening of sex?

Methinks not.

This is one reason I liked prostitution. It was a straight transaction — I got something, she got something. No one owed anybody anything at the end of it. I still crave that, to leave the room knowing that my partner got out of it as much as I did. Perhaps that’s why I am good at it. The more she enjoys it, the less I feel in her debt. I also have a tremendous ego. I don’t do things that I’m not good at. I’m a very good golfer, a very good financial consultant, a very good fighter, and a very good lover. If I do something, I want to be the best.

When we finish — ladies first — we both lie back on the cream-colored Mulberry silk sheets and down pillows. We take deep breaths. I close my eyes for a moment. She pours more of the sparkling rosé and hands me a flute. I let her feed me a chocolate strawberry.

“We’ve met before,” she says to me.

“I know.”

This isn’t uncommon. Her real name is Bitsy Cabot. The superrich travel in rarefied albeit similar circles. It would be strange if I didn’t know most of the women. Bitsy is probably a few years older than I am. I know she splits her time between New York City, the Hamptons, and Palm Beach. I know that she is married to a rich hedge fund manager, but I can’t remember his first name. I don’t know why she’s doing this. I also don’t care.

“At the Radcliffes’,” I say.

“Yes. Their gala last summer was wonderful.”

“It’s for a good cause.”

“It is, yes.”

“Cordelia throws a good party,” I say.

You probably think that I can’t wait to get dressed and leave — that I don’t ever spend the night so as to avoid any attachment issues. But you’d be wrong. If she wants me to stay, I stay. If she doesn’t, I leave. Sometimes she is the one to leave. It doesn’t really matter to me. I sleep the same whether she is here or not. This bed is quite comfortable. That’s all that really matters.

She isn’t going to reach me by staying. She isn’t going to repel me either.

One major point in favor of the overnight: If we do stay, I often get a spectacular morning encore without the hassle of finding another partner. That’s a nice bonus.

“Do you go to the gala every year?” she asks.

“When I’m in the Hamptons,” I say. “Are you on any of the committees?”

“The food one, yes.”

“Who does the catering?” I ask.

“Rashida. Do you know her?”

I shake my head.

“She’s divine. I can message you her contact.”

“Thank you.”

Bitsy leans over and kisses me. I smile and hold her gaze.

She slips out of bed. I watch her every move. She likes that.

“I really enjoyed tonight,” she says.

“As did I.”

Another thing that may surprise you: I don’t have a problem with repeat engagements because in truth there are only so many fish in this particular sea. I am honest about my intentions. If I feel that they want more from me, I end it. Does this always work as cleanly as I’m making it sound? No, of course not. But this is as clean as it gets and maintains what I require.

For a few more moments I don’t move. I bathe in this afterglow. It’s two a.m. As much as I’ve enjoyed tonight, as much as I am certain I would relish an encore or two with her, I try to imagine spending the rest of my life only making love to Bitsy Cabot. To any one person, really. I shiver at the thought. I’m sorry — I don’t get it. Myron is married now to a stunning, vibrant woman named Terese. They are in love. If it works out as Myron hopes, he will never know the flesh of another.

I don’t get it.

Bitsy heads to the bathroom. When she comes out, she is dressed. I am still in the bed, my head propped in my hands.

“I better head back,” she says, as though I know where back is. I sit up as she says, “Goodbye, Win.”

“Goodbye, Bitsy.”

And then, like all good things, it’s over.

The next morning, I have a car service take me to the airport to visit my old FBI boss, PT.

I used to love to drive. I am a big fan of Jaguars and still keep two at Lockwood — a 2014 XKR-S GT that I use when I’m out there and a 1954 XK120 Alloy Roadster, which my father gave me for my thirtieth birthday. But when you reside in Manhattan, driving is out of the question. The borough is basically a parking lot that sways forward. One of the great things that money can buy is time. I don’t fly private or have a driver because I crave more comfort in my life. I spend the money on those items because at the end of your life, you will crave more of what the annoying experts coin “quality time.” That’s what private jets and chauffeur-driven cars allow you to do. I have the ability to buy time — and that, when you think about it, is the closest thing to buying happiness and longevity.

The driver today is a Polish woman from the city of Wrocław named Magda. We talk for the first few minutes of the journey. Magda is reluctant at first to engage — exclusive drivers are often schooled on not bothering the upscale clientele — but I find every human being is a tale if you ask the right questions. So I probe a bit. I can see her eyes in the rearview mirror. They are a deep blue. Blonde hair peeks out of her chauffeur cap. I wonder about what the rest of her looks like, because I’m a man, and at heart, all men are pigs. It doesn’t mean I would do anything about it.

Today’s vehicle is a Mercedes-Maybach S650. The Maybach brand gives you a wheelbase stretch of eight inches, so that your chair can tilt back forty-three degrees. The plush seat has a power footrest, a hot-stone massage setting, and heated armrests. There is also a folding tray/desk so as to get work done, a small refrigerator, and cupholders that can cool or heat, depending on your preference.

Come to think of it, perhaps I do crave the comfort.

Teterboro is the closest airport from Manhattan for private aircraft. I flew into Teterboro with Swagg Daddy after our night of quasi debauchery in Indianapolis. When we reach the well-guarded gate on the south end, Magda is waved through straight to the tarmac. We pull up next to a Gulfstream G700, a plane that hasn’t really hit the market yet. I’m surprised. The G700 is expensive — close to $80 million — and government officials, even top-echelon, clandestine ones like PT, are not usually that extravagant. Middle Eastern sheiks use the G700, not FBI agents.