David Liss - The Ethical Assassin

“They’re DC,” the blond kid said.

Something twisted in his gut. Something ugly and mean and judgmental was now stomping toward him like an ogre. “What does that mean?” He felt his face grow hot. Were these kids calling him a queer?

“We don’t read DC comics,” the boy said. “We read Marvel. DC is, you know, stupid.”

Okay, they weren’t calling him a queer. Just stupid. Well, that was fine. Kids often had this notion that adults were somehow dorky or clueless. He could live with that for now. Let them spend some time with him and they’d know better.

“Yeah?” B.B. asked. “So, who else do you like?”

“I like Wolverine,” the boy said defiantly. “I read mostly X-Men. ”

“That’s great,” said B.B., who lamented a world in which kids read a comic book called The Ex-Men. What was going on, exactly? Blind guys and transsexuals? “Listen, I was thinking about heading out to get some ice cream. You boys like ice cream?”

“Ice cream,” said the beautiful blond kid with an unmistakable note of caution in his voice. A sort of “Who wants to know?” kind of tone.

The thing you had to remember, though, was that these were kids, and they had thoughtless, neglectful parents, the sorts of parents who instilled fear in their kids because they couldn’t be bothered to teach them how to distinguish between dangerous strangers and kind people who wanted only to help. They knew adults often told them not to do things, but they also knew that adults often had their heads up their asses. The trick was to get them to see that the “Don’t go off with strangers” rule didn’t apply here, couldn’t apply here, not when this stranger had their best interests at heart. Once you broke down those barriers, you were home free. “There’s an IHOP down the road. I thought you boys might want to get an ice cream with me.”

“Really?” the little kid asked. “What flavor?”

“We’re not supposed to,” the older boy said, looking at his brother rather than B.B. “Our dad said we had to stay here. And he says we shouldn’t talk to strangers.”

There it was, regular as clockwork. “I’m sure your dad means that you shouldn’t talk to bad men. I can’t imagine why he would have any problem with you talking to a nice man who wants to buy you ice cream. Anyhow, my name is William. Everyone calls me B.B., and I work with young men like you every day. I’m a mentor.”

They didn’t say anything.

“We’re even staying at the same motel,” he continued. “I’m over in room one twenty-one. What are your names?”

“I’m Pete and he’s Carl,” said the little one.

“Pete and Carl. Well, it looks like we’re not strangers anymore, don’t you think?”

“I want strawberry ice cream,” the little one said. He nearly sang it. Too loud for B.B.’s taste. The last thing you wanted was a bunch of meddlers getting involved in what they didn’t understand. “I don’t like chocolate.”

“Forget it.” His brother shook his head. “I can ask my dad when he gets back tonight.”

“Tonight?” B.B. asked, letting the judgment and incredulity seep into his voice. Caution was one thing, but they were standing in their own way. When was the next time they were going to meet someone who was willing to help them, to make them feel important and special, in control of their own destinies, if not their lives, at this moment? “You want to wait until tonight? I’m going for ice cream now. It’s hot, and I want ice cream, but I can wait a few minutes if you want to run upstairs and get changed. How fast you think you can be ready?”

“Five minutes!” the younger one said.

“Wow, that’s fast.” B.B. grinned. “You think the Ex-Men could get ready that fast?”

“Even faster!” the little kid shouted.

It was hard to keep a little triumph from creeping into his smile. Jesus, he was on a roll.

“I don’t think we should go,” the older one said.

B.B. shook his head sadly. “Well, if your brother wants to go by himself, that’s okay, too. You sure you want to stay alone?”

Doubt stretched its shadow across his face. His feet twirled anxiously in the water. He bit his lip. “We’re not either of us going?” It was a question, not a statement.

“Just because you don’t want ice cream doesn’t mean your brother shouldn’t enjoy it. I think it’s wrong to deny things to other people because you don’t want them yourself. That’s what they call being selfish, Carl.”

“Yeah,” his brother agreed.

“I don’t know,” he said again, which was not exactly a yes, but certainly a retreat from “We’re neither of us going.” B.B. was gaining momentum; he could feel it. The thing here, he knew, was to go with the flow, to keep it outside of his head. If he thought too much about it, if he concentrated too hard, he would say the wrong thing and blow it. Stay in the zone.

“What’s going on here?” the sunbathing woman asked. She now stood directly behind B.B., hands on her massive hips, sunglasses propped on her head. Her exposed brown skin glistened with suntan oil. Glimpsing her over his own sunglasses, he was struck by the prettiness of her eyes. Not that B.B. went for fat bossy cows, but still, there was no denying it- they were stunningly green, healthy-lawn green, emerald green, tropical fish green.

“My goodness,” B.B. said. “Those are the prettiest green eyes I’ve ever seen.”

“Tell me something I don’t know. What’s going on with you and these boys?”

“I was asking them to play quietly,” B.B. said, “so they wouldn’t bother you anymore.”

“And ice cream,” the little one said. “Don’t forget the ice cream.”

B.B. went pink as he looked at the woman. “I thought that if I bribed them with a little ice cream, they might leave you alone.”

“You’re sweet,” she said. “Now why don’t you get out of here before I call the cops?”

B.B. took off his sunglasses entirely and met her gaze. “Lady,” he said, “I am the cops.” He’d tried this one before. Always worked like a charm. Better than telling someone he ran a charity that helped young men.

She wasn’t going for it, though. “Let’s see some ID.”

“I’m off duty. I don’t have it on me.”

“Well, if you go and get it now,” she said, “you’ll have it ready by the time your fellow officers get here.”

“Fine,” he said. “I’ll be right back. See you in a minute, boys.”

B.B. walked breezily toward his room, where he would have no choice but to hole up until the cow finished baking.

MELFORD HAD BEEN DRIVING in silence, and I was paying him very little attention. Mostly I was trying to come up with ways to convince myself that my run-in with Bobby wouldn’t end in disaster. It was only once we’d pulled into Meadowbrook Grove that I snapped out of my fog.

I stared at the trailers, the ragged lawns, the empty lots. “What the hell are you thinking? We need to stay away from this place, not go back to it.”

“Your plan of avoidance sounds fine in theory, but the truth is that we need to figure out what is going on. And to do that, we have to learn who that third body in the trailer was. As near as I can tell, the only lead we have is going to be what the neighbors can tell us. So you’re going to go into salesman mode, only instead of selling worthless encyclopedias, you’re going to ask about Bastard and Karen and who might have been by to see them last night.”

“Should I also ask them if they’ve seen anyone who looks exactly like me fleeing the scene of the crime?”

“Relax, Lemuel. No one saw you.”

“If it’s so relaxing, why don’t you do it?”