Carol Ericson - Circumstantial Memories

“It’s small.” She pointed to the words smudged out in the blood, and felt a thrill of victory when her finger didn’t tremble.

Ryder sloshed the soap in the bucket of water and doused the porch with it. He crouched forward and began scrubbing the stains from the wood.

“Did you ever go inside the house?”

“Not yet.” She aimed the nozzle of the hose at the bottom of the step and shot a spray of water that carried the red-tinged soap in a tide down the walkway and into the grass.

“Don’t you think you should take a look?” He dipped the brush in the bucket again and sat back on his heels. “I’m surprised Sheriff Ballard didn’t have you check inside.”

“I think Sheriff Ballard was a little worried that I might find more evidence linking his son to these…tricks.”

“Maybe that’s why he suggested the camera. He meant it as a warning to Zack. Let’s finish up here, and I’ll go inside with you.”

Ryder scrubbed and she rinsed, and they vanquished most of the red streaks and drops. She stepped back, hands on her hips. “I’m going to have to paint that door. Maybe I’ll paint it red this time to save myself the trouble next time.”

Ryder dropped the brush and peeled off the rubber gloves. “There’s not going to be a next time, even if I have to stake out your place myself.”

She liked the sound of that, but her mouth quirked at the irony. Just when she found a man ready and willing to protect her, she’d rediscovered her backbone. Knowing more about her past and what she’d survived gave her courage. After escaping from her traitorous ex-husband and his killers, she didn’t fear a garden-variety stalker. Did she?

“Are you ready?” Ryder gestured toward the newly scrubbed front door.

Julia tried the handle first and blew out a breath when she discovered the lock engaged. She inserted her key and pushed the door open, but Ryder stepped in front of her, shielding her with his solid form.

She trailed after him through the house as he checked every room and every closet. Looked like the new, heavy-duty locks kept the weirdo out this time.

“Now that we’ve resolved one issue, can I have a look at this on your computer?” Ryder waved the CD that he’d shoved in his jacket pocket at her.

Julia swallowed. Cleaning up the mess hardly resolved the problem of her stalker, and now they had to move onto the next issue. This one would be easier to handle. At least the disc never made it into the hands of the bad guys and now it looked like it never would.

She led Ryder to her computer where he sat down and inserted the CD. The computer allowed him to access the CD and even open the file, but that’s where it stopped. Lines of symbols ran across the document, which was locked for editing.

Ryder peered at the screen and grunted. “That’s ours. Jeremy must’ve stolen this CD from Black Cobra and hidden it in your apartment in Paris. When he was ready to sell it to our enemies, he called you to bring it to him in Arizona.”

“He hid it under a loose floorboard.” Wedging her hip against the chair, Julia caught her lower lip between her teeth. The Paris apartment flooded her senses-the gleaming hardwood floors, the way the sun spilled across the dining room table, the scent of roses that filled vases scattered across a brightly furnished room, the sea-green comforter that almost floated above the antique bed.

The bed. Love and warmth emanated from that bed, so strong Julia longed to sink into it, wrap herself in its pleasure. She must have loved Jeremy at one point. They shared that bed together as husband and wife.

No, not Jeremy.

“Do you remember?” Ryder looked up from the computer, his gaze searching her face.

His warm, blue eyes deepened the languid pleasure, throbbing in her veins at the memory of the bed in her Paris apartment. A surge of desire claimed her body, weakening her knees. Gripping the back of the chair, she sank against its arm, the side of her hip brushing Ryder’s shoulder.

Ryder curled his arm around her waist and pulled her into his lap. With her legs dangling over the arm of the chair, Ryder kissed her mouth. His lips sought hers in a sweet caress, tentative, almost gentle.

She didn’t want gentle. She craved the scorching, searing passion imprinted on her soul by…Ryder? She couldn’t remember. She couldn’t remember Ryder in her bed. Couldn’t remember Ryder making love to her. She only knew she could feel it now. But what if the memories of that passion came from her ex-husband and not Ryder?

An iron vice fell from his heart. Julia remembered. She remembered their love, remembered how he’d helped her pick up the pieces of her life when she discovered Jeremy’s betrayal of their wedding vows. Now he knew she hadn’t thought of him as her rebound man, her second choice, forever the middle brother. She’d risked her life to save his by delivering the CD to Jeremy in Arizona.

She must realize their love created Shelby and she wasn’t afraid. She was going to trust him to be a father to their daughter.

He deepened his kiss, but Julia stiffened in his arms. Her body, soft and compliant only seconds earlier, shot up straight and tense. Her legs flailed in the air as she tried to gain a foothold on the floor.

Planting her hands on his thighs, she launched out of the chair and stumbled against the desk. Her eyes widened while a range of emotions played in their depths.

“I’m sorry. The events of the day are taking their toll.”

What just happened? He cocked his head to the side. Her actions convinced him she remembered their relationship and the heady days they spent in Paris after her divorce and before his reassignment to Somalia. Was she pushing him away because she knew he was Shelby ’s father?

“You said you remembered.”

“I remembered about the disc.” She shoved her hands in her pockets and spun around to face the window.

He gripped the arms of the chair. She remembered finding the CD, not making love with him. How important could it have been to her? Her memories were flooding in from all directions now, but she still didn’t remember him.

“So you recall the phone call from Jeremy leading up to finding the CD under the floorboards?” He closed the coded file and ejected the CD.

“Not exactly. The conversation itself is gone, but I recall the urgency of getting that disc and bringing it to Jeremy.”

Did the urgency come from protecting him or from doing Jeremy’s bidding? Maybe Jeremy’s killer interrupted his reconciliation with Julia or maybe it was Julia’s pregnancy. Discovering her pregnancy must’ve enraged Jeremy.

Ryder shook his head. Could he start over with Julia if he’d only imagined the love they shared?

JULIA GLIDED into the living room with her finger to her lips. “I finally got Shelby to sleep. She couldn’t stop talking about Skipper and the riding lesson.”

“Glad she liked it.” Ryder dropped his father’s tools in the metal chest and rubbed his hands on the seat of his jeans. “She’s a natural on horseback.”

“Is the camera installed?” Julia gestured toward the toolbox.

“Cameras. I installed one on the front porch, hidden in a hanging flower pot and one on the back porch in another flower pot. Just don’t give those two plants much water.”

Julia’s shoulders slumped as she sat on the arm of an overstuffed chair. The situation upset her more than she let on, which typified the Julia he knew. She put on a brave front even as she crumbled inside. He wanted to let her know she could crumble right in front of him and he wouldn’t turn away, wouldn’t run, wouldn’t demand that she hold herself together like her mother would have. Like Jeremy would have.

“Are you going to be okay here tonight? I could stay.”