David Baldacci - Fries Alive

Freddy explained. “At first I just made them out of my Dad’s secret potatoes and wired them so they could do a few movements. But after seeing the Spanker float I knew I needed something a lot cooler than that. So I used microchips from some old computers to hardwire their brains. I used the biggest microchip I had in the blue one. I call him Theodore. The purple one is Wally, because he’s in the shape of a waffle fry. The chip in his brain got damaged, but I figured it would still work. The yellow one is Ziggy. I gave him a very funny feature.” He pointed to the green Fry. “That’s Curly, because he’s a curlicue Fry. He can stretch twenty feet into the air, although I had some problems wiring his voice box.”

“So they can talk?” asked an amazed Howie.

“Well, that’s the general idea. The red Fry I don’t have a name for yet. I split its brain chip in half and did some special wiring to give it two different personalities. I thought it’d be kind of neat.”

Howie timidly walked over and gently touched the purple Fry’s leg.

“What are they made of?”

“That’s the best part. Like I said, I used my dad’s super secret potatoes, but I reinforced them with carbon tubes bonded together. Carbon tubing is stronger than anything else in the universe and it’s more flexible than rubber or plastic. It’s called nanotechnology. My dad worked on it when he was with the government. I also built in an electronic-based nervous system and aluminum skeletal platform.”

“Does your dad know you used his stuff?”

Freddy looked a little nervous. “Uh, I haven’t exactly told him yet. I just sort of borrowed the nanotechnology formula and added the potatoes and a few things of my own. I’m sure he won’t mind.”

“So, how come they’re not talking or moving?”

“That’s the problem. I discovered that the energy source required to jump-start them is huge, at least a million jiggy-watts of power. I don’t have anywhere near enough in my generator. I don’t know what I’m going to do,” he added glumly as he sat on the floor.

Howie sat next to Freddy. “A million jiggy-watts, huh? Heck, the hydroelectric dam where my dad works only has half that much power.”

Freddy looked at his friend. “But aren’t there two dams-an upper and a lower one?”

“Yeah, so?”

“So they each produce half-a-million jiggy-watts?”

“Yeah?”

Freddy said excitedly, “Well, the last time I checked, 500,000 plus 500,000 equals a million.”

“But how are you going to use the dam’s power to fire up the Fries?”

“I know just how, but I’m going to need your help. It could be dangerous, though.”

Howie paled. “Gee, Freddy, I don’t know.”

“Are you my best friend?”

“I’m your only friend.”

“Okay, so are you a man or a mouse?”

Howie pulled out a handful of cheese cubes. “Squeak-squeak,” he said.

“Listen, Howie, if we pull this off, we’ll be world-famous. That’s always been my dream. We’ll meet the president, for gosh sakes. We’ll even go to Disney World.” Howie didn’t look impressed with any of this.

“Gee whiz, Howie, what will it take for you to help me?”

Howie thought for a bit and then said, “The world’s largest cheese cube is at a museum in Paris. It’s made from the world’s most stinky cheese, Pâté du Pooty; it’s a hundred feet high and weighs eight and a half tons.”

“It’s yours.”

“Let’s go get those jiggy-watts.”

“Freddy, are you really sure this is a good idea?” shouted Howie.

“It’s the only way that I can see to do it,” Freddy yelled back.

It was very early the next morning. They both had sneaked out of their houses to go on this very special mission. They were on the Pookesville Lake, steering their raft closer to the top of the Pookesville Dam. Piled under a tarp on the raft were the five Fries and some special equipment that Freddy had brought.

Howie looked at the dark sky. “Looks like a storm’s coming in.”

“I checked the weather forecast. We should be long gone before it hits.”

The raft touched a stone barrier at the side of the dam and the boys tied up there.

“Okay, Howie, there’re the stairs to the control room. That’s where the turbines are, right?”

“Yep. And there’s no one there right now. My dad doesn’t get in until nine.”

“You got the key?”

Howie held it up. “The spare from my Dad’s desk at home.”

“Roger that.”

“Over and out, up and down. BINGO!” yelled an excited Howie.

They carried the Fries and equipment down the stairs and to the control room. Howie unlocked the door and they went in.

“Wow,” said Freddy, looking around at all the shiny equipment. “This is so cool.”

“Yeah, and it’s got almost as much stuff as your lab.”

“Okay, let’s go. I’ll re-program the control board to divert the necessary power from the hydroelectric operations to the Fries for one-point-two milliseconds. According to my calculations, that should be all that we need.”

While Freddy reprogrammed the controls, Howie hooked up electrodes to each of the Fries and then attached these by cables to the massive turbines where the electricity gathered from the dam was collected.

They heard a rumble of thunder outside.

“Wow, that storm is really moving fast,” observed Howie as he looked out the window.

“You ready, Howie?” asked Freddy as he finished pushing buttons.

“Ready.”

Freddy and Howie put on safety goggles and lead vests and moved behind a wall. In his hand Freddy held a small remote. “Okay, Howie, keep your fingers crossed.”

“Finger, toes, but don’t pick your nose,” recited Howie, who took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Freddy took his own deep breath, and hit the button.

At first nothing happened and Freddy thought something had gone wrong.

But then there was a low humming sound, and then a louder one, and then an enormous CRRAAACCCKKK! This was followed by a blinding flash of light. And then there was a burning smell. And then everything became quiet again.

Freddy slowly opened his eyes and looked around the corner.

The Fries were still there, their heads still attached to the electrodes. However, other than being slightly singed, nothing had changed. They were still lumps of lifeless potato and carbon.

Freddy stared at his remote control. “We hit them with a million jiggy-watts and it didn’t work. I… I can’t believe it.”

Howie looked at his watch. “We better get going. My dad will be here soon.”

They packed up their gear and the Fries and carried them back out to the raft.

“What am I gonna do, Howie?” muttered a depressed Freddy. “This was my last chance.”

“Here, have a cheese cube. It’ll make you think better.”

The boys put on their life jackets, and while Freddy chewed on his cheese cube Howie steered their raft back out onto the lake.

“Better start paddling, Freddy,” barked Howie. “That storm is right on top of us.”

Freddy started paddling halfheartedly. But then the wind picked up. The waves got bigger and the rain started falling hard like millions of BBs. Then Freddy started paddling really fast.

Howie’s face grew very pale. “Uh, Freddy?”

“Yeah?”

“Is that what I think it is?”

Freddy looked to where Howie was pointing. A wave ten feet high was bearing down on them fast.

“AAAAHHHH!!!” both boys screamed together.

“Abandon ship,” yelled Howie.