Sara Foster - Beneath the Shadows

Her arms felt heavy as she flicked through the rest of the pictures, before she looked back at the photo of Adam and his mother. Rachel had both arms around her son, while Adam had one arm draped casually across his mother’s shoulders, his body towards the camera. What had they been feeling back then? It was impossible to tell from one photo. Or was it? For despite Rachel’s smile, she held Adam tightly, as though he were a ballast in the middle of a raging storm, and if she gripped on long enough she might secure him to her. She appeared to be a woman who knew exactly what the future held. Whereas Adam looked like an uncertain young teenager posing for a picture.

‘Grace, are you still alive up there?’

She snapped out of her daydream and returned the photos to the box. She would set the personal memorabilia to one side, and sort through it all at once. She didn’t want to spend too many days sifting through painful reminders of things that were irrevocably gone.

Grace’s fingers were stiff with cold as she steered Millie’s pushchair down the hill, with Annabel trudging beside her. At the bottom, they crossed the small stone bridge and headed for the next incline. ‘This is the pub,’ Grace said as they passed a two-storey whitewashed building, its chimney puffing grey smoke into the frigid air. ‘Those are old workers’ cottages, back when they had a brickworks here.’ She pointed towards the tumbledown buildings in a row some distance away, and then indicated the hill ahead of them. ‘Meredith lives in the house up there.’

They could just make out high grey-stone walls. ‘You didn’t tell me we were lunching with the lady of the manor,’ Annabel said. They began the climb towards it, Grace’s arms straining from the effort as she pushed Millie ahead of her. As they drew near, the house towered above them. It was set back from the road at the end of a short gravel driveway, and formed an L-shape, a single-storey building to their left abutting the double-storey house. Four large sash windows were visible at the front, set out in a square, while trailing ivy had formed an arch over the door. A pristine burgundy four-wheel drive was parked by the entrance.

‘This place is impressive,’ Annabel said as they reached the drive. ‘Why do you think they built it here, on its own?’

Before Grace could reply, a frantic barking began from inside. The door swung open and Grace found herself staring into Meredith’s steely grey eyes. Grace was about to speak, when a large black dog bounded out from behind Meredith and launched itself at her.

‘Pippa, come here,’ Meredith commanded, and Grace watched in admiration as the dog immediately scampered back to her owner. Meredith took hold of Pippa’s collar and guided her inside, then reappeared a moment later and held the door open for them. She stood straight-backed, as though she had learned to balance a pile of books on her head at a young age and had never forgotten the pose. She hadn’t gone for the looser soft perms popular with the older women Grace knew; instead, her hair was close-cropped to her head in a pixie-style, and it suited her, highlighting her bone structure, strong lines that would never change underneath the creases of her pale skin.

‘Hello Meredith,’ Grace said, her warm smile fading a little as Meredith studied her. Grace was sure that on previous occasions Meredith had been affable, but the woman before them exuded a polite coolness, little more. Don’t judge her too hastily, she chided herself. Remember, she’s recently lost her husband. She felt a surge of empathy.

‘Hello, Grace, it’s nice to see you again,’ Meredith replied, holding out a hand and shaking with a strong, firm grip.

‘This is Annabel,’ Grace said, as they also shook hands.

Meredith glanced at the pushchair. ‘And this must be Millie.’ She knelt down to look under the shade. ‘Hello, little miss.’ Then she straightened again. ‘Well, come on in.’

They were shown along a hallway, past a wide staircase and a few closed doors, before they finally walked into a vast, high-ceilinged room. ‘Wow,’ Annabel breathed, echoing Grace’s reaction.

In the centre, a huge square table was set for lunch, silver and glassware shining atop a pristine cream tablecloth. A three-piece burgundy leather suite was arranged in one corner, and the furniture was all a matching, gleaming mahogany. But what had really caught their attention was the vast picture window that ran from ceiling to floor on one side, framing a panoramic vista. Before them lay an endless tract of moorland, the unbroken stretch of earth drawing the eye further and further away in search of focus. There was little to find except for the occasional thicket, or the odd solitary tree standing sentinel. Without buildings to obscure it, the sky made up the larger part of the picture, and today it was a cloud-spattered backdrop of washed-out blue.

‘We had the window put in over a decade ago, when we did some major work on the house.’ Meredith had followed their captivated stares. ‘When the heather is out in the autumn, the whole landscape turns a royal purple – it’s quite a sight. Well, come and have a seat at the table. I’m afraid I don’t have a high chair…’

‘Oh, no problem.’ Grace looked over at Millie. ‘She’ll be asleep for a while, I think.’ She took in the smell of roasting meat, and her mouth began to water. ‘Can we do anything to help?’

Annabel set a bottle of red wine in the middle of the table. ‘We brought this. Would you like me to pour?’ She set about opening the bottle, while Grace marvelled at how easily Annabel made herself at home wherever she was.

Meredith was heading out of the room. ‘Thank you. I’ll just go and check on lunch.’

While they waited, Grace guided the pushchair into a corner and took a seat at the table. It was set for four, glinting silver cutlery laid out in perfect symmetry, next to side dishes that featured a delicate motif of apples and oranges. Annabel took Grace’s glass and poured her a generous amount of red wine, as Meredith returned from the kitchen bearing a tray of Yorkshire puddings the size of dinner plates.

‘In Yorkshire we always serve the puddings first.’ She used a pair of tongs to put a pudding on each of their plates. ‘Claire should be down in a minute.’

‘She said she was living here at the moment?’ Grace asked, as she accepted the large jug of steaming gravy Meredith held out.

‘Yes,’ Meredith replied as she sat down. ‘She’s been on her gap year for as long as I can remember. It seems holidaying is her occupation, and work is what she does to fill the time in between.’

‘It’s not holidaying, Mum,’ Claire said merrily as she entered the room. ‘It’s seeing the world. And I work while I’m away too, you know.’ She came and took her place at the table. ‘Hi Grace,’ she said, without waiting for her mother’s response. ‘And you must be Grace’s sister. Annabel, is it?’

Grace tucked into her pudding as she listened to the introductions. ‘These are delicious, Meredith.’

‘Mum’s been making them since time began.’ Claire looked fondly at her mother. ‘She’s got it down to a fine art. She may not sound like a Yorkshirewoman, but she definitely cooks like one.’

Meredith gave her daughter a wry glance, then turned to Grace and Annabel. ‘My father’s side is Yorkshire through and through, but the war changed things here. He went down to London during his conscription, and brought my mother back with him. She loved the countryside, but wasn’t so keen on the accent. She worked hard to make sure I spoke “the Queen’s English”, as she used to say. She did the same to all the children she taught, caused a few rifts with the locals around here.’