Лоуренс Блок - Death Pulls a Doublecross [= Cowards Kiss]

“I thought he would kill me.”

“So you threw him a bone,” I said. “You gave him my name.”

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“That’s a good excuse, isn’t it? You use it every other sentence. It’s a little worn out now. Anyway, Bannister wasn’t as stupid as you were. The minute he had me on the phone he knew I wasn’t the guy who called him in the first place. But you gave him a place to start. I was the only name he knew and he decided to work me over for all I was worth. He put a pair of thugs on my neck and they gave me a hard time. And that was your fault.”

“I didn’t know—”

“You never knew anything.” I was disgusted with him. “You loused up everything you touched. You were the clumsiest clod in history. Your lies were so clumsy I believed them and your actions were so stupid they were impossible to analyze. First you were going to skip the country with Alicia and the jewels. Then she was dead and you were set to sell the jewels on your own. Finally things got so shaky you were scared to breathe. The money didn’t look so big any more. My phone call this morning had you jumping out of your skin, didn’t it?”

“Yes. I was afraid.”

I nodded. “So you wanted to get rid of the briefcase. It was simple once you found out I wasn’t home. While I waited for your call, you came over here. Maybe you were going to stick the briefcase under my mat, then found the key and came inside. You dropped the case on the coffee table and called me from my own phone. That was a cute touch. So you must have figured you were lucky to be out of it. You still had Kaye and the kids, even if you didn’t care about them—”

“I—”

“Don’t tell me how much you love them,” I said. “I’m sick of all your passionate attachments. You had your wife and your daughters and your position and your practice. The romantic life just wasn’t worth it any more; you were happy to be in the clear. That’s why you were so glad to switch that line of yours about how Alicia and the apartment looked when you found her. Anything to let yourself off the hook.”

He was silent now. I turned my back on him and poured a drink, half-hoping he’d make a break for it so I could have an excuse to take him apart again. But hitting him wouldn’t be much of a kick now. The hatred and anger were slipping away and contempt was taking their place. He wasn’t worth hitting.

“Get up,” I said.

He looked worried. “Go on,” I said. “Get up. I’m not going to hit you. I’m sick of looking at you — you look pretty damned silly on the floor.”

He stood up shakily. His eyes were wary.

“Jack, why?”

I watched him while he thought about it. He took his time getting his answers ready, and when he got going I had the feeling that he was talking as much to himself as to me.

“I’m not sure,” he said. “I... Kaye and I haven’t loved each other in years. A marriage can get very stale without going completely dead. We went stale.”

“Just like that?”

“A little at a time. I don’t know. I sat around in a rut and didn’t know it. Maybe I made a mistake going into medicine. I was never that crazy to be a doctor. Money and respect and security — they motivated me more than any real interest in medicine. And then I met Alicia.”

He paused for breath. “Each of us was just right for the other, Ed. It was almost chemical. A chemical reaction. She was a footloose thing who never knew what was going to happen next to her. She’d been a prostitute and a marijuana smoker and a con-man’s partner and everything else under the sun. She told me stories that made my hair curl. She was excitement for me; I wasn’t in a rut any more.”

“Go on.”

“I don’t know. I had to make one big break, one stab in the right direction. With the money from the jewels we could make a whole new life for ourselves. It looked too good to be true.”

“How long before the new life turned into a rut?”

“It wouldn’t have happened,” he said doggedly.

“Sure.”

“Ed, we loved each other.”

“Sure. You loved Kaye once, didn’t you?”

He sighed. “That was different. I was a different man, a younger man. It was a different sort of love. I loved Alicia very much.”

“So you killed her.”

He stared at me. He started to say something but I didn’t give him a chance. I held up a hand to shut him up.

I said: “You killed her. You and Wallstein both loved her and both of you killed her. You set her up for him. If you weren’t in the picture, she and Wallstein would have pulled off their swindle. They’d have wound up safe in Canada. You made her cross him and he killed her. He was a braver man than you, Jack. He killed her with a sword. You killed her with a kiss.”

After a very long moment he gave me a slow nod. I waited for him to say something.

“You ought to kill me,” he said finally.

“Probably.”

“You should.”

I shook my head. “I’ve killed too many men today,” I told him. “Four of them. Can you believe it? Four men, and you’re worse than any of them. But I’m sick of killing and sicker of playing God. I couldn’t kill you.”

“What... what are you going to do with me?”

“I can’t turn you over to the cops,” I said. “And it would be silly as hell even if I could. I’d be hurting Kaye and the girls more than you. And I can’t even beat you up — I haven’t got the stomach for it. You’re a rotten son of a bitch and I can’t do a thing to you.”

He stood there and didn’t say a word.

I said: “Get out of here. Get out, get away from me, stay away from me. I don’t want to see you again or speak to you again. Go home to Kaye and pretend you’re a husband. She needs you. I don’t know how in hell anybody could need somebody like you, but she needs you. She can have you.”

He didn’t move.

“Damn you, get out!”

He turned and walked to the door. He opened it and left, closed it behind him. I heard him go down the stairs and leave the building.

I went over to the window. It was raining now, big heavy drops that soaked the pavement. I opened the window to let some fresh air into the place.

She sat across from me with one elbow on the table and her forehead resting in the palm of her hand. With her other hand she held a spoon and stirred a cup of black coffee. Her eyes were focused on the coffee. She wore a pale green sweater over a simple white blouse and she looked beautiful.

I wondered what it would be like to sit across a table from her two or three times a day. I could think of worse ways to spend a day. Or a week, or a lifetime.

She said: “Curiouser and curiouser, said Alice.”

“You don’t get it?”

She shook her head. “No, that’s not it. I understand what happened and everything. But the people are confusing.”

“I know.”

“That Peter Armin. I suppose I should call him Wallstein, shouldn’t I? But I can’t think of him that way. He... didn’t seem like a Nazi. I just can’t picture him sticking out his hand and screaming ‘Heil Hitler.’ It’s not consistent.”

“He wasn’t exactly a storm trooper, Maddy.”

“Hardly. He was more like... oh, who was the one? The propaganda one. You know who I mean.”

“Goebbels,” I said. “Joseph Goebbels, Minister of Propaganda. Hitler’s brain. I think you’re right. Wallstein was that kind of guy.”

She screwed up her face. “I liked Armin, Ed. Isn’t that silly? I actually liked the man.”

“I liked him myself.”

“And Enright turned out to be such a bastard. And he doesn’t get punished.”

“You’re wrong.”

“I am?”

I nodded. “There’s a balance here. It’s pretty neat. Death was the worst punishment for Bannister and his boys. And for Wallstein. And life is the worst punishment for Jack Enright.”