Don Bruns - Stuff Dreams Are Made Of

“What do you want? We have a license. Board of health, the whole thing.” I signaled James who scrambled to bring it out. He obviously didn’t want any trouble with the officers.

“Forget that. We need to talk to the reverend. Where do we find him?”

I breathed a deep sigh of relief. “He actually passed here several minutes ago. He was headed that way.” I pointed in the direction they’d gone.

“How about a Thomas LeRoy?”

James climbed down from the truck bed and handed the license to the officer. The uniformed official brushed him off, and I saw that look in James’s eyes. I prayed he would be cool about the situation.

“We’re here because of a shooting at South Beach. Do either of you have any information about a Barry Romans? He’s a local radio talk-show host. He was the victim of a shooting earlier today. Do you know anything about that at all?”

James stood behind the officer and stared hard at me holding up his hand and shaking his head.

“Uh, no. Reverend Cashdollar may have mentioned it during his service but — ”

James continued to stand behind the officer, waving his hands and shaking his head.

“He talked about it? What did he say?”

“I don’t remember. Just that somebody may have taken a shot and — ”

“Did he talk about how it happened?”

“No. Definitely he didn’t talk about how it happened.”

He looked at me, the glasses reflecting my disheveled, worried look. After tapping the toe of his highly polished shoe for several seconds, he said, “Look, if you see either of them in the next half hour, tell them to come to this yellow tent.” He surveyed the canvas monstrosity, taking in its size. “We want to talk to them. Understood?”

I nodded. He probably wanted to hear, “Yes sir.” I couldn’t do it. Especially not with James there.

“Do you hear me?”

Intimidation. For no reason at all. “I hear you. And while you’re yelling at me, Reverend Cashdollar is still walking down there.” I pointed.

The officer gave me a hard look through his tinted glasses, spun around, and walked down the path. His partner stayed by the car.

“Assholes. You don’t become a cop unless you’re an asshole.” James whispered it. He glanced back over his shoulder at the other officer.

“What were you trying to tell me? Shaking your head, waving your hands?”

“Jesus, Skip, I know you better than you know yourself. You were going to tell them about Cashdollar’s crusade.”

“And what would have been wrong with — ”

“All we heard was Cashdollar saying he didn’t agree with Barry Romans’ philosophy.”

“Oh, I think it was a little stronger than that.”

“Then you would have told them about his comments today and the death threat.”

“I still don’t see what would have been — ”

“And because you were on a roll, you would have pointed out that Bruce Crayer just happened to be within a block of the shooting at the time of the shooting.”

“James, damn it, you know I wouldn’t have — ”

“We know nothing, amigo. Once you start talking, they’ll ask you questions all night long. They’re liable to haul your ass downtown and arrest you on suspicion.”

“Of what?”

“Whatever they want, pally. They can do it. ‘You seem to have information, you come with us.’ I’m telling you, the cops have the power. And they know it. In this country, in this city, you are guilty until proven innocent, and if you don’t believe it, just deal with the cops.”

“You’ve got it backward.”

“Ever been there, pally? He was. My father is proof positive. Guilty. Until proven innocent. And even then, they find a way to fuck you.”

I mentioned it already. Several times. James does not like law enforcement officials. The situation with his father had tainted his outlook on the police.

“Besides, we really don’t know anything. Although tonight our luck may change.”

“And what’s going to happen tonight?”

“We’re going to ask some questions, turn over some stones. I like the idea of this whole thing being kind of a mystery.”

“Besides there being an attempted murder, besides there being a possible connection to a senator’s death, and the death of a black girl, besides there being a drug overdose and a threat on Cashdollar’s life, besides receiving a warning that we should leave, what’s a mystery? And what do you think we can do about it? You, my friend, are crazy. We shouldn’t be within ten thousand feet of this place.”

He looked at me as if I hadn’t heard a word he’d said. “Skip, for God’s sake, we’ve been through this too many times already. Somebody blew out our tires. Somebody broke into the truck and stole five hundred bucks. Wouldn’t you like to get to the bottom of this?”

“James, again I ask, what the hell can we do about it? I’ll hang in here with you, but what can we do? We’re not trained to deal with this kind of stuff.”

“I’ve got some ideas.”

“You’re going to tell me what they are?”

“Daron has some ideas as well.”

Oh, Jesus. Daron? His idea was to rip off the luggage from unsuspecting tourists. Daron’s idea was to sell counterfeit watches and purses. This jackass’s idea was to scam a hotel for free food and drinks. My idea was to cut bait and bail. Get the hell out of Dodge. “And if we try to do something and screw this up and upset someone, we may want the cops to be our best friends.”

“Well then, my friend, the object is not to screw it up. Tonight, we will have to be like a midget at a urinal. Stay on our toes.”

I had to think for a minute. It was from Naked Gun, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember who said it.

N o one came up to invite us, but James decided he would attend the evening’s card game. I gave James a stake, and stashed the rest of the cash in the locked glove box of Daron’s Buick.

“I’d love to sit in on a game, but considering Stan and I didn’t exactly leave on good terms, I probably need to stay away from the full-timers.”

Daron had eased back into camp as soon as the patrol car left. I never saw Cashdollar or Thomas LeRoy interviewing with the cops, but I figured the officers must have gotten what they came for.

We all three sat on the back of the truck swinging our legs, listening to the crickets and night birds in a cacophony of sound. There was a glow coming from about thirty yards to the right, the light emanating from the small camper area, where the residents were watching portable televisions, building small campfires, or running generators for their lamps. The smell of wood smoke was in the air.

“I’m going to play, I’m going to drink some beers, and I’m going to win.” James was having beer withdrawal. I thought maybe his buddy Daron would offer to run out to a carryout, and even buy the beer, but that hadn’t happened.

“And what else are you planning?”

“I’m going to ask some questions. I’m sure the topic will be Barry Romans and the death threat on Cashdollar. I mean we’ve got some serious topics to throw around tonight.”

“Ask him about our tires. About somebody stealing our money. About the threatening letter.”

“Skip, fuck you. I can’t just ask those kinds of questions. Come on, amigo. I’ve got to be a little subtle.”

“You?”

“I can’t just say ‘who shot our tires? Who sent the threatening letter?’ ”

“I’m half serious.” I was. “I asked Dusty last night.”

“Did you get any answers?”

I ignored him.

“Besides, Stan said to only talk to him.”

“Then fine. You’re going to be with Stan? Then talk to Stan. Ask him those questions while he’s fleecing you for all the money you’ve got on you.” He kept saying one of the reasons we were staying, aside from the money, was to determine who was yanking us around. “James, you know as well as I do, if you want answers, ask direct questions.”