Robert Randisi - It Was a Very Bad Year

‘Mr S. thinks he’s a fucking great president.’

‘Yeah, I know he does.’

I could feel Jerry looking at me, but I kept my eyes on the TV. I didn’t want to start talking politics with him. It wasn’t something we had ever done before. And I wouldn’t have been able to explain why I wasn’t feeling much of what everyone else seemed to be feeling. Maybe I was in shock.

We ended up sitting there, staring at the TV, drinking beer, and before long we got around to business.

‘So what are we gonna do?’ he asked.

I considered the question, coming as it did about three hours after JFK had been shot. Was that all the President of the United States was worth, three hours of our time? The truth was the nation would be mourning for weeks, maybe months. Even though the nation itself got back to business when Lyndon Baines Johnson had to be sworn in as the President of the United States aboard Air Force One at Love Field Airport, only two hours and eight minutes after JFK’s death.

‘I’m gonna call Danny, see if he’s come up with someplace quiet for us to take Irwin, so we can talk to him properly.’

‘Yeah, but first we got to get him to meet us,’ Jerry said. ‘Where’s that gonna be?’

‘I’m thinking one of those strip clubs on either side of his house.’

‘Don’t you think that’ll be suspicious?’ Jerry asked. ‘He won’t think that’s a coincidence, us wanting to meet him right near his house?’

‘I expect he already knows we were in his house, don’t you?’

‘Well, yeah,’ Jerry said, ‘once he sees those photos missin’ he’s gonna think of you right away.’

‘So I might as well call him and see where we can set up a meet,’ I said.

‘If he still wants to do it.’

‘He’s going to be pissed,’ I said, ‘but he’s also gonna want his ten grand. I’ll give him a call at his studio.’

I walked to the phone. Jerry got up and lowered the volume on the TV.

The phone in the studio rang almost eight times. I started to think maybe Irwin was home watching television like everybody else, but right at the start of that eighth ring he picked up.

‘Irwin Studios.’

‘It’s Eddie Gianelli, Barney,’ I said.

‘You sonofabitch!’ he spat. ‘You robbed my house.’

I could have pointed out that we didn’t steal his house, we simply broke into it, but decided he was already pissed off enough.

‘What do you mean?’ I asked.

‘Come on,’ he said, ‘I know it was you who swiped my pictures. I want ’em back!’

‘We made a deal for the Abby Dalton photos, Barney,’ I said. ‘That’s what I’m calling about. If you lost some others I don’t know anything about it.’

‘I didn’t lose nothin’,’ he said. ‘You stole ’em.’

‘Do you want your ten grand or not?’

There was a moment of silence and then he said grudgingly, ‘Yeah, I want the money.’

‘All right, so let’s meet.’

‘Where?’

‘Not Clipper’s.’

‘Well, I ain’t lettin’ you pick the place,’ Irwin said.

‘You been watching the TV, Barney? Anyplace we go is gonna be in an uproar. We need someplace quiet.’

‘Then come here.’

‘Your studio?’

‘I’ll put the closed sign out. There won’t be nobody here.’

‘No photo shoot today?’

‘I had a couple, but they both canceled because of the President.’ He sounded miffed that JFK had ruined his day.

‘OK, what time?’

He thought a moment, then said, ‘Six.’

‘No earlier?’

‘I said six.’

‘Yeah, OK, fine. I’ll be there at six.’

‘Come alone,’ he said, and hung up.

‘When?’ Jerry asked.

‘Six.’

‘That gives him hours to come up with some back-up,’ Jerry said.

‘You’re right.’

‘And he wants you to come alone, right?’

‘Right.’

‘Yeah,’ Jerry said, ‘I’m gonna have to pick the lock on that back door again.

‘Can you do it quicker, this time?’

‘Sure,’ Jerry said, ‘now that I done it once, I should be better.’

‘OK,’ I said, ‘I’ll go in the front and start talking up the exchange.’

‘I’ll come in the back door, take out his back-up, and then we can squeeze him.’

‘Sounds like a plan.’

And like all plans, it just had to go off without a hitch. .

We hung out in Jerry’s room the rest of the day, followed the day’s progress on the screen. The Governor had been shot in the back, but survived his surgery. His wife and the first lady had been unharmed. By the time we left at five thirty we had no news about who had fired the shots.

I called Danny before we left, told him we’d settled on a meeting place.

‘OK,’ he said, ‘I’ve got somewhere for you to take him.’ He gave me the address. ‘Do you want me to meet you at the studio?’

‘No, Jerry and I can handle that. We’ll meet you later.’

‘OK, but be careful.’

By the time we parked around the corner from Irwin’s studio it was five fifty-three.

‘Gimme ten minutes to get in the back door,’ Jerry said, ‘then go in.’

‘Gotcha.’

He went down the alley that led behind Irwin’s studio. I waited a full ten minutes and then walked around the corner and went in the front door. I had the money on me that Abby had given me, five grand.

I entered the studio, found it as musty and filthy as the last time. I decided not to go walking down the hall, looking for Irwin. Instead, I called out to him.

‘Irwin! Where are you?’

I suddenly found myself hoping we weren’t going to find a dead body. Jerry and I had found more than our share during the time we’d known each other.

‘Hey, Barney.’

‘Back here,’ Irwin’s voice called.

OK, so I would have to go down the hall. If Irwin did, indeed, have back-up with him I wondered if they’d be armed. Then I wondered if Jerry was armed. I hadn’t asked him. Maybe I hadn’t wanted to know.

I went down the hall and through the same curtained doorway. No naked girls, this time. Just Irwin, standing in the center of the room with his arms folded. He looked like he was posing.

‘You got my money?’ he asked.

‘I’ve got it,’ I said. ‘You got the pictures?’

Instead of answering the question he said, ‘Meet Wayne.’

‘Wayne who?’

‘Wayne me,’ a voice said from behind me. A big man in his fifties came in through the same doorway I’d used. He had broad shoulders and muscular arms, but sported a hard paunch. He shopped the same place for clothes that Irwin did. Still, I would not have wanted to try to handle him alone.

‘What’s this?’ I asked.

‘Give me the dough.’

‘Not till I see the pictures.’

Irwin shook his head and looked past me at Wayne. I turned, saw Wayne reach behind him and come up with a sap. I was glad it wasn’t a gun.

I also saw Jerry’s big forearm come through the curtain and snake around Wayne’s neck. His other hand relieved the man of his weapon. The big man immediately began to fight, but he was no match for Jerry. His face started to change colors, and by the time it reached purple he passed out. Jerry lowered him to the floor.

I turned and looked at Irwin, who seemed panicked.

‘H-hey-’ he said.

‘What was your plan, Barney? Have Wayne work me over and then take the money?’

‘Naw, naw,’ Irwin said.

Jerry stepped past me and approached the photographer. Irwin put both hands out in front of him and cringed.

‘Hey, I got neighbors,’ he said. ‘They’ll hear-’

‘Relax, Barney,’ I said. ‘We’re just gonna go for a little ride.’