Гарри Кемельман - Tuesday The Rabbi Saw Red

Ekko appropriated the one chair. It was a wing-back job whose fabric was not only faded but marred by cigarette burns caused by the carelessness, if not actual vandalism, of the previous tenants who resented the inflated rent they had to pay. "Just pin on a couple of lace dollies and it'll look like new." the renting agent had said.

Judy, although a senior, looked like a young girl. Not only was she tiny, but her face had a childlike expression with a small rosebud mouth and large innocent dark eyes, she sat on the floor, her head against Ekko's knee, flicking her cigarette in the general direction of the ashtray on the floor, with her other hand she massaged his calf under his trouser leg.

On the ratty sofa with sagging springs sat Mike O'Brien who worked part-time in a bank and so wore a regular suit and a white shirt and even a tie for God's sakes; his fat little fingers were intertwined on his lap.

Yance Allworth lay on the floor, his handsome Afro resting on a cushion he had pulled off the sofa, he was wearing fringed pants of purple leather and a pink silk shirt that contrasted dramatically with his dark black skin. His eyes were closed and he appeared to be asleep as Abner Selzer, bearded and with hair nearly down to his shoulders, reported on his conversation with the dean.

"I arranged it for half-past two today because—" he broke off. "Jeez Judy, do you have to feel him up while we're having a meeting?"

"Screw you," she said amiably.

"Get on with it." said Ekko, patting her head like a dog's."— because that's when Millie Hanbury suggested," he concluded.

"Screw Millie Hanbury." said Allworth through half closed lips.

"Maybe I wouldn't mind." said Selzer. "She's got some built."

"You'd mind, all right." said Judy. "She's a dyke."

"How do you know?" asked O'Brien, interested.

"It stands to reason." Judy said. "She was a Phys. Ed, major in college, all those Phys. Ed, types are. What I'd like to know is why we got to meet her at half-past two on a Friday."

"Friday the thirteenth." Yance Allworth murmured.

"Because Friday the place is like a ghost town, there won't be anyone around. Just us."

"So what kind of pressure can we bring with just the five of us?"

"More than if we held the meeting Monday morning as you suggested. Judy," Selzer retorted. "Then we could get maybe fifty kids, seventy-five at the most, and Hanbury would take one look, see we could only scare up a handful, and know right away she held all the cards."

"How do you know we'd only get fifty?" asked O'Brien.

"Because that's the name of the game nowadays." said Selzer. "You know how many signatures we got to our petition? With Fine as a drawing card? A hundred and nineteen, that's all we could get in a whole week, one hundred and nineteen lousy signatures. So when Hanbury suggested Friday afternoon, I snapped it up because that way we don't show our weakness."

"I bet if we'd joined with the Weathervanes, we'd have got a hell of a lot more," said O'Brien.

"Screw the Weathervanes," Allworth murmured.

"You and me both." said Ekko. "That's a freaked out bunch of crazies that I wouldn't join on a streetcar in a rush hour."

"They're real revolutionaries," O'Brien insisted.

"They're real zombies, is what they are." said Ekko. "You say, half-past two, Abner? Okay, so it's half-past two. Did you tell her why we wanted to see her?"

"No, but she knows we're pushing for Fine naturally because of the sign on the Marble."

"I told you Roger asked us to lay off" said Ekko. "Screw Roger Fine." said Allworth.

"Right." Selzer agreed. "We aren't doing this for Fine, he's just an example, we're interested in like a principle."

"That's right. Ekko." said Judy. "If they're going to drop any teacher that sides with us, where in hell we going to get faculty support?"

They argued back and forth, getting nowhere, until it was time to split. Ekko saw them out, but on the landing he took Selzer aside.

"I didn't want to say it in front of the others, but Roger is pretty upset about the petition and even more about our meeting with Millie. You see, he's already resigned."

"Resigned? What the hell—"

"He had to." said Ekko. "He says they had him over a barrel and made him write out a letter of resignation. Millie's got it in her safe right this minute. I wasn't supposed to tell anybody, but with the meeting today I figured we ought to go kind of easy— you know, keep it like general— so we shouldn't end up with egg all over our face."

"Yeah." Already the wheels were spinning as Selzer began revising his strategy, then he shook his head. "I don't know, maybe we ought to let her spring it on us, and then just tell her we know but feel he was forced into it."

"I still think—"Selzer felt his leadership questioned. "Look, you want to handle it, Ekko?"

"No, I just don't want to see Rog get the short end of the stick."

"Don't worry, all along, the best I ever figured was a draw."

"How do you mean?"

"We'd lose on Fine, but we'd get a promise on somebody else."

"Yeah, Well, keep it in mind." Ekko turned, then said: "Say, does anybody else know about this meeting?"

"I didn't tell anybody. Why?"

"Well, I wouldn't want any of those crazy Weathervanes to come pushing in, then the dean would use that as an excuse to lower the boom on Roger."

"Who would tell them?"

"Well, Mike is always talking about how the Weathervanes would do this and the Weathervanes would do that, and I've seen him with that Aggie broad."Selzer considered and then shook his head. "Nah. Mike's all right, he just talks. It makes up for the square clothes he has to wear at the bank." He laughed and clumped down the stairs to catch up the others.

They separated at the Charles Street train station. Yance and Abner taking the stairs to the overhead while O'Brien continued into the city, after a block or so. Mike stopped at a drugstore pay phone and, carefully closing the door of the booth, dialed a number, the phone rang half a dozen times before it was answered. "Yeah?"

"Is Aggie there?" asked O'Brien."Aggie who?"

"Just Aggie. Just see if Aggie's there."He waited and then another voice, a woman's voice, said. "Hi, lover."

Rabbi Small did not look forward to meeting his last class of the week, but each Friday he would hope that this time there would be a normal complement, and each time he would be disappointed.

He could not avoid the feeling of resentment, even though he knew it was irrational; and this Friday, the thirteenth, was no different: a dozen students were present and he was annoyed, he closed the door behind him, and without a word of greeting, mounted the platform.

Nodding briefly, he turned his back to write the assignment on the blackboard and when he turned around he received a profound shock: half the class was gone! Then he saw that they had not left the room but were sitting on the floor in the aisles.

He was not in the mood for joking; he never was on a Friday. "Will you please come to order,” he called.

There was no response. Those still in their chairs looked down at their open notebooks, reluctant to meet his eye.

"Please take your seats." No movement.

"I cannot give my lecture while you are sitting on the floor."

"Why not?" It was Harry Luftig, who asked from the floor, not impertinently— politely, in fact.

For a moment the rabbi was uncertain what to say, then he had an idea. "To sit on the floor is a sign of mourning with us Jews,” he said. "The devout sit on the floor during the seven-day mourning period, we also do it on the Ninth of Av, the day of the destruction of the temple. In the synagogues we sit on the floor or on low stools and recite from the Book of Lamentations. But now it is Friday afternoon and the Sabbath is approaching. Mourning is explicitly forbidden on the Sabbath."