Philip Kerr - Berlin Noir

In the fresh air and sunshine he seemed to become more animated, like some kind of reptile.

‘This was the summer house of the first Friedrich Wilhelm,’ he said expansively. ‘And more recently the Republic used it for important guests such as the King of Egypt, and the British prime minister. Ramsay MacDonald of course, not that idiot with the umbrella. I think it’s one of the most beautiful of all the old palaces. I often walk here. This garden connects Sipo with Gestapo headquarters, so it’s actually very convenient for me. And it’s especially pleasant at this time of year. Do you have a garden, Herr Gunther?’

‘No,’ I said. ‘They’ve always seemed like a lot of work to me. When I stop work, that’s exactly what I do – stop work, not start digging in a garden.’

‘That’s too bad. At my home in Schlactensee we have a fine garden with its own croquet lawn. Are either of you familiar with the game?’

‘No,’ we said in unison.

‘It’s an interesting game; I believe it’s very popular in England. It provides an interesting metaphor for the new Germany. Laws are merely hoops through which the people must be driven, with varying degrees of force. But there can be no movement without the mallet – croquet really is a perfect game for a policeman.’ Nebe nodded thoughtfully, and Heydrich himself seemed pleased with this comparison. He began to talk quite freely. In brief about some of the things he hated – Freemasons, Catholics, Jehovah’s Witnesses, homosexuals and Admiral Canaris, the head of the Abwehr, German Military Secret Intelligence; and at length about some of the things that gave him pleasure – the piano and the cello, fencing, his favourite nightclubs and his family.

‘The new Germany,’ he said, ‘is all about arresting the decline of the family, you know, and establishing a national community of blood. Things are changing. For instance, there are now only 22,787 tramps in Germany, 5,500 fewer than at the start of the year. There are more marriages, more births and half as many divorces. You might well ask me why the family is so important to the Party. Well, I’ll tell you. Children. The better our children, the better the future for Germany. So when something threatens those children, then we had better act quickly.’

I found a cigarette and started to pay attention. It seemed like he was coming to the point at last. We stopped at a park bench and sat down, me between Heydrich and Nebe, the chicken-liver in the black-bread sandwich.

‘You don’t like gardens,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘What about children? Do you like them?’

‘I like them.’

‘Good,’ he said. ‘It’s my own personal opinion that it is essential to like them, doing what we do – even the things we must do that are hard because they seem distasteful to us – for otherwise we can find no expression for our humanity. Do you understand what I mean?’

I wasn’t sure I did, but I nodded anyway.

‘May I be frank with you?’ he said. ‘In confidence?’

‘Be my guest.’

‘A maniac is loose on the streets of Berlin, Herr Gunther.’

I shrugged. ‘Not so as you would notice,’ I said.

Heydrich shook his head impatiently.

‘No, I don’t mean a stormtrooper beating up some old Jew. I mean a murderer. He’s raped and killed and mutilated four young German girls in as many months.’

‘I haven’t seen anything in the newspapers about it.’

Heydrich laughed. ‘The newspapers print what we tell them to print, and there’s an embargo on this particular story.’

‘Thanks to Streicher and his anti-Semitic rag, it would only get blamed on the Jews,’ said Nebe.

‘Precisely so,’ said Heydrich. ‘The last thing I want is an anti-Jewish riot in this city. That sort of thing offends my sense of public order. It offends me as a policeman. When we do decide to clear out the Jews it will be in a proper way, not with a rabble to do it. There are the commercial implications too. A couple of weeks ago some idiots in Nuremberg decided to tear down a synagogue. One that just happened to be well-insured with a German insurance company. It cost them thousands of marks to settle the claim. So you see, race riots are very bad for business.’

‘So why tell me?’

‘I want this lunatic caught, and caught soon, Gunther.’ He looked drily at Nebe. ‘In the best traditions of Kripo a man, a Jew, has already confessed to the murders. However, since he was almost certainly in custody at the time of the last murder, it seems that he might actually be innocent, and that an over-zealous element in Nebe’s beloved police force may quite simply have framed this man.

‘But you, Gunther, you have no racial or political axe to grind. And what is more you have considerable experience in this field of criminal investigation. After all it was you, was it not, who apprehended Gormann, the strangler? That may have been ten years ago, but everyone still remembers the case.’ He paused and looked me straight in the eye – an uncomfortable sensation. ‘In other words, I want you back, Gunther. Back in Kripo, and tracking down this madman before he kills again.’

I flicked my cigarette-butt into the bushes and stood up. Arthur Nebe stared at me dispassionately, almost as if he disagreed with Heydrich’s wish to have me back on the force and leading the investigation in preference to any of his own men. I lit another cigarette and thought for a moment.

‘Hell, there must be other bulls,’ I said. ‘What about the one who caught Kürten, the Beast of Düsseldorf. Why not get him?’

‘We’ve already checked up on him,’ said Nebe. ‘It would seem that Peter Kürten just gave himself up. Prior to that it was hardly the most efficient investigation.’

‘Isn’t there anyone else?’

Nebe shook his head.

‘You see, Gunther,’ said Heydrich, ‘we come back to you again. Quite frankly I doubt that there is a better detective in the whole of Germany.’

I laughed and shook my head. ‘You’re good. Very good. That was a nice speech you made about children and the family, General, but of course we both know that the real reason you’re keeping the lid on this thing is because it makes your modern police force look like a bunch of incompetents. Bad for them, bad for you. And the real reason you want me back is not because I’m such a good detective, but because the rest are so bad. The only sort of crimes that today’s Kripo is capable of solving are things like race-defilement, or telling a joke about the Führer.’

Heydrich smiled like a guilty dog, his eyes narrowing. ‘Are you refusing me, Herr Gunther?’ he said evenly.

‘I’d like to help, really I would. But your timing is poor. You see, I’ve only just found out that my partner was murdered last night. You can call me old-fashioned, but I’d like to find out who killed him. Ordinarily I’d leave it to the boys in the Murder Commission, but given what you’ve just told me it doesn’t sound too promising, does it? They’ve all but accused me of killing him, so who knows, maybe they’ll force me to sign a confession, in which case I’ll have to work for you in order to escape the guillotine.’

‘Naturally I’d heard about Herr Stahlecker’s unfortunate death,’ he said, standing up again. ‘And of course you’ll want to make some inquiries. If my men can be of any assistance, no matter how incompetent, then please don’t hesitate. However, assuming for a moment that this obstacle were removed, what would be your answer?’

I shrugged. ‘Assuming that if I refused I would lose my private investigator’s licence -’

‘Naturally…’

‘- gun permit, driving licence -’

‘No doubt we’d find some excuse…’

‘- then probably I would be forced to accept.’