Alan Glynn: Winterland

At night it’s not so bad, she thinks. It’s dark, street dark, and the atmosphere is a little different.

‘This is fine,’ she tells the driver, ‘just here on the left.’

The cab pulls up.

Gina pays and gets out. It’s colder than it seemed earlier, and she’s suddenly conscious of what she’s wearing – short denim skirt, floral print top and pin-striped jacket – all fine for wandering around town in, but a little bonkers for out here, for this.

There’s nothing she can do about it now, though – not that Catherine is going to register what Gina, or anyone else for that matter, is wearing. But Yvonne or Michelle might, and the last thing she wants to see is them exchanging glances.

Look at madame .

Is it Gina’s fault that they have no social lives anymore? Is it her fault that they are both stuck in a time warp? Is it her fault that they never got out of Dolanstown?

But she’s being ridiculous again, and she knows it, and she knows why, too. It’s displacement. Because this is going to be really hard. The level of Catherine’s grief will be unimaginable. No one will be able to help her. No one will have anything more to offer her than a hug and a few platitudes.

Approaching the house, Gina takes a deep breath.

The first thing she notices is an SUV parked in the driveway.

This can only be Noel’s.

She rolls her eyes. Every time she sees Noel, which of course isn’t that often, he’s driving something different.

As she’s passing the SUV, she peers into its tinted windows. She sees nothing except her own reflection. Up ahead, the hall door of the house opens and Noel himself comes out. He’s wearing a heavy overcoat and appears to be in a hurry. When he spots Gina, he rushes up to her, takes her by the hand and kisses her on the cheek.

‘How are you, sweetheart?’

‘I’m OK. How’s Catherine?’

He makes a face, shakes his head, shrugs his shoulders – each time about to say something, each time about to make an assessment, each time defeated.

Gina nods along.

Eventually, Noel says, ‘The Guards have just left. They say she can’t go in to identify the body until the morning.’

‘Which means it’s going to be a long night.’

‘Yeah, looks like it.’

They both shake their heads.

Gina then says, ‘So what happened? Do we know anything?’

‘No. I made a couple of calls a while ago. No one knows a thing.’ He pauses. ‘You do realise what he’s been up to for the last few years?’

‘Well yeah, I read the papers,’ Gina says. ‘But it’s not like anyone ever talks about it.’

‘No. I suppose. Catherine had a hard time with it, understandably.’ He looks around, shivers from the cold and turns back to face Gina. ‘But anyway, from what I’ve heard it was unexpected.’

‘Weird.’

‘Yeah.’

Noel then looks Gina up and down. ‘Jesus, are you not freezing in that get-up?’

She nods yes, then says, ‘I was in town at a gig. Going on to a party. What do you want?’

‘No, I’m just saying.’ He looks at her again. ‘Here, do you want my coat?’

He starts taking it off. She puts a hand out to stop him.

‘ No ,’ she laughs. ‘Are you mad?’

This is so Noel.

He shuffles the coat back on.

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yeah, I’m grand.’

He reaches out and strokes her cheek.

‘You’re my baby sister,’ he says, ‘and I love you. I wish I saw you more often. Are you all right ?’

‘Yeah, of course.’

‘How’s the software business?’

‘It’s OK,’ she says. It feels weird to be talking like this, casually, as if nothing has happened. ‘We’re under a lot of pressure at the moment.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Well, with the downturn and all.’

Gina and her business partner, P.J., run Lucius, a small software-development company. They started up with some decent venture capital behind them, but that was back when the economy still seemed unassailable. Now, after two years, they have yet to launch a product on the market, and P.J.’ s trip to London is an attempt to drum up some potential customer interest.

‘It’s a living,’ she adds, half defensively. ‘Not that my bank manager is too convinced.’

Noel squints his eyes at this.

‘ What ?’ Gina says.

‘Are you all right for money?’

She nods. But that’s not enough, apparently. ‘Yeah, I am.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Noel,’ she says, ‘that was a joke .’

Though actually it wasn’t. Since Lucius started up, they’ve been working on the same software package – a suite of integrated data-management tools – but their burn rate has been pretty startling of late. In fact, the VCs are beginning to get alarmed, which is quite serious, because if they pull the plug now there won’t be any salaries at the end of the month. There won’t be any jobs.

For anyone.

‘Look, I’m fine ,’ she adds. ‘I am, really. Thanks.’

Noel shrugs his shoulders.

Gina raps her knuckles gently against the side of the SUV. ‘So, where are you off to?’

Noel exhales and looks exasperated all of a sudden. ‘Oh, I’ve got to go and pick something up in town. I’m meeting someone.’ He glances at his watch. ‘I’ll be back, though. Half an hour, forty-five minutes.’

‘Whatever happened to office hours?’

He snorts at this. ‘You must be joking.’

‘I suppose I am. But listen,’ she says, ‘Richmond Plaza? It’s amazing. Really. I look down the quays at it every morning when I come out of my building. It’s transforming the skyline.’

‘Well, that’s the idea,’ Noel says. The firm he’s a partner in, BCM, are the structural engineers on this docklands development. ‘Let’s hope we make it to the finishing line.’

Gina furrows her brow. ‘Why wouldn’t you? Isn’t it almost finished?’

‘It is, yeah, of course. And we will .’ He looks out, over her shoulder, hesitating. ‘It’s just that, well, you know what it’s like these days. And you wouldn’t believe the headaches involved.’ He looks at his watch again, and adds, ‘ This , for instance.’

Gina notices for the first time how gaunt Noel looks. He is pale and has bags under his eyes.

‘And what is this exactly?’

‘Oh, you don’t want to know, believe me. It’s a situation, engineering stuff, an unholy bloody mess.’ He waves a hand in the air, as if to magic it all away.

Gina leans forward slightly. ‘Noel, are you OK?’

He nods vigorously. ‘I’m fine, I’m fine, Jesus. Now go on, get inside or you’ll catch your death. And I’ll see you in a while.’

‘OK.’

But neither of them moves.

Noel then reaches out and takes her by the arm. ‘I know these are awful circumstances,’ he says, staring into her eyes, ‘and let’s face it, the next couple of days are going to be fairly hectic, but maybe at some point we can sit down and have a really good chat, yeah?’

‘Yeah, I’d like that.’

And she would, too. Every time she sees Noel she remembers how much she likes him.

‘Great,’ Noel says, giving her arm a quick squeeze. ‘I’ll look forward to it.’ He then produces car keys from his pocket. Gina steps back and watches him getting into the SUV. As he pulls out of the driveway, he looks around, beeps the horn and waves.

Gina waves back, turns and heads for the front door.

Noel can’t help smiling as he cruises along Greenhalgh Road West. He always gets a kick out of seeing Gina. Despite the age gap, he feels connected to her in a way that he doesn’t with the others, and it’s not some indulgent, avuncular type of thing either – he and she have a lot in common. He and she, as Noel sees it, are the two that got away. Catherine, Michelle and Yvonne all got trapped early – limited exposure to education, maximum exposure to neighbourhood muppets like Jimmy Dempsey. Noel, on the other hand – and with a work ethic inherited from their old man – clawed his way through school and then, as he stacked shelves by day, through an engineering course at night. Maybe Gina didn’t have to claw so much, because the times were a little different, but Noel still thinks of her as someone with the drive and ambition to achieve almost anything.