Iris Johansen - Blood Game

She smiled. “Where have you been? I was wondering what happened to you. I saw that the coffee was-” She stopped, her eyes widening as she saw his face. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he said curtly. “I went for a walk in the woods.”

“At this hour? Dressed like that?”

“Why not? I couldn’t sleep.” He went to the coffeemaker and poured a cup of coffee. “There’s no law against it. I guarantee it. Who should know better than a cop?”

His tone was almost brutally sharp, and he was avoiding looking at her. But he was too late; she had already caught that first glimpse of his expression. Joe was seldom pale, but his color wasn’t good now. The skin looked as if it was pulled taut over his cheekbones, and his brown eyes were glittering and appeared a little wild. Wild? Joe was never wild. He could be violent and reckless, but it was always under control.

“Why couldn’t you sleep?”

“How the hell do I know? Maybe I was dreaming of those murdered kids on that island in the swamp. That’s what my life has been about, hasn’t it? Murdered kids.” He took a swallow of coffee. “Or maybe just one murdered kid. Your kid. From the moment I met you, it’s been all about Bonnie. It’s enough to drive anyone nuts.”

She stiffened in shock. It was true, their lives had revolved around Bonnie’s death and disappearance all these years, but his harshness came as a blow. She supposed it shouldn’t have hurt since she’d been aware that Joe was nearing the end of his patience. He’d given all his strength and knowledge to try to give her what she needed, and having her constantly in jeopardy was tearing him apart. “You’re right, of course. No one knows better than I do what I put you through. You have a perfect right to want to escape from me and the situation.”

He suddenly whirled on her. “I don’t want to escape you,” he said fiercely. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved. From the first time I saw you, I knew that I had to stay with you. When the FBI sent me down to Atlanta to investigate your Bonnie’s disappearance and probable death, who the hell would guess that I wouldn’t be able to leave you. You’d lost a sweet seven-year-old little girl who meant the world to you. You were fragile and tragic and yet so damn strong that it blew me away. I wanted to fight all your dragons and give you whatever you wanted.”

“You have,” she said unevenly. “Only it’s been a one-way street. I haven’t fought any dragons for you. You deserve someone who will do that.”

“Screw it. I knew what I was getting into when we came together.” His eyes were blazing in his taut face. “But I haven’t been able to kill your dragon, and I started wondering tonight if it’s going to devour me.”

“Tonight?” He had not been like this when she had left him to go to the airport. She had been aware of a slight withdrawal, but his attitude now was full of violence and explosive tension. She could almost feel the disturbance whirling around him. “Did something happen while I was gone?”

“Of course not. I told you I just went for a walk.” He set his cup down on the counter and turned away. “And I’m tired of being cross-examined. I’m fine. Drop it, Eve.”

“So fine that you haven’t asked why Jane wasn’t with me when I came back.”

He looked back at her. “Is she okay?”

“Yes, her plane had a mechanical problem and had to land in Charlotte. She’ll call me when she’s ready to board again.”

“That’s good. I’m going to shower, then make some phone calls and go into work early. I have paperwork to do.”

“Don’t you dare leave this room,” Eve said fiercely. “Something’s wrong. I know it, dammit. Tell me.”

“If there’s something wrong, I can handle it by myself. I can fight my own dragons.” Joe’s words were jerky as he strode toward the door. “I don’t need help.”

“Joe, for God’s sake, talk to me.”

He didn’t answer. She watched the bedroom door shut behind him. He was closing her out, mentally as well as physically.

She felt the pain soaring through her. She had known trouble was on the horizon, but she had thought she’d have time to try to work her way through it. What the hell had happened to escalate the situation?

Her cell phone rang. Jane.

She took a few seconds to pull herself together before she answered the call. “I wasn’t expecting to hear from you so soon.”

“They managed to fix the other plane. I’m boarding now. Do you want me to get a rental car?”

“Don’t be silly. I’m on my way. I’ll meet you at baggage claim.”

Jane was silent for a moment. “You sound funny. Are you okay?”

“Sure. I’ll be even better when I see you. Bye.” She hung up.

Trust Jane to read her mood even long-distance. She hesitated as she cast a glance at the closed bedroom door. No, she wouldn’t go in and tell Joe she was leaving for the airport. The closing of that door had been firm and final. She would give him time and hope that those dragons he was talking about would slink away into the darkness.

She left the house and ran down the porch steps to the car. But her eyes were stinging with tears, and she had to wait a moment before she pulled out of the driveway. Her hands clenched on the steering wheel as she stared blindly out into the darkness.

Joe’s pain was all about Bonnie and Eve’s obsession with finding her daughter’s murderer. The hunt that had gone on for years. It was hurting him. She couldn’t expect him to have empathy. He had never had a child. They had taken Jane from foster homes when she was ten, and by that time, Jane had been wise beyond her years. She had become their friend, not their child. Joe had never had the wonderful experiences that Eve had known of raising a little girl. That was why he would never understand why Eve couldn’t let it go.

Because the memory of Bonnie would never let go. That night before Bonnie was taken was as fresh tonight as if it had happened yesterday.

Bonnie running into Eve’s bedroom in her yellow pajamas with the orange clowns all over them. Her wild red curls were bouncing, and her face was lit with her luminous smile.

“Mama, Lindsey says her mother is going to let her wear her Goofy T-shirt to the park tomorrow for the school picnic. Can I wear my Bugs Bunny T-shirt?”

Eve looked up from her English Lit book open on the desk in front of her. “It’s not can, it’s may, baby. And yes, you may wear Bugs tomorrow.” She smiled. “We wouldn’t want Lindsey to put you in the shade.”

“I wouldn’t care. She’s my friend. You said we always had to want the best for our friends.”

“Yes, we do. Now run along to bed.”

Bonnie didn’t move. “I know you’re studying for your test, but could you read me a story?” She added coaxingly, “I thought maybe a very, very, short one?”

“Your grandmother loves to read you stories, baby.”

Bonnie came closer and whispered, “I love Grandma. But it’s always special when you read it to me. Just a short one…”

Eve glanced at her Lit book. She’d be up until after midnight as it was studying for that exam. She looked at Bonnie’s pleading face. Oh, to hell with it. Bonnie was the reason Eve was working for her degree anyway. She was the reason for every action Eve took in life. Why cheat either one of them? “Run and choose a storybook.” She pushed her textbook aside and stood up. “And it doesn’t have to be a short one.”

Bonnie’s expression could have lit up Times Square. “No, I promise…” She ran out of the room. She was back in seconds with a Dr. Seuss book. “This will be quick, and I like the rhymes.”