Tarquin Hall - The Case of the Man Who Died Laughing

“It’s our understanding the Godman recorded this footage himself with cameras hidden inside the room where he has welcomed thousands of people privately over the years – including at least two prime ministers,” said the lady presenter.

The video showed a young female devotee entering the audience chamber, stopping to touch Maharaj Swami’s feet and then sitting before him.

“The pixilation effect you’re seeing around her face has been added by our technicians in order to protect her identity,” continued the presenter. “Some of the images we are about to show you have had to be disguised as well because of their graphic content. But what you’re watching here is this young lady performing favors of, well, an oral nature for the pleasure of Godman Maharaj Swami. Again, this footage was taken inside his private audience chamber on a hidden camera placed there for – and here we can only speculate – Swami-ji’s own purposes.”

A male co-presenter appeared on the screen and said: “In an extraordinary development, the woman who appeared in the video has come forward this morning. We cannot show her face, but she tells a harrowing tale of systematic sexual abuse at the ashram.”

A silhouetted profile of Damayanti, newly liberated from the Abode of Eternal Love, appeared. In a hesitant, at times choked voice, she described how the Godman had emotionally blackmailed her into performing sexual acts in his audience chamber.

“Swami-ji used to say that like Lord Krishna’s gopis, or milk maidens, it was my duty to show him unconditional love,” she said. “I was terrified of telling my parents because I knew they would never believe me and I thought they would disown me.”

After the clip, the male presenter appeared again and said: “We’re going live now to Haridwar for the latest developments in this breaking story from our reporter Smeeta. Smeeta, what can you tell us?”

The screen divided. On the left, the CCTV footage played on a loop; on the right, Smeeta stood in front of the main gates of the Abode of Eternal Love, which were being guarded by police.

“Yes, dramatic developments here in Haridwar,” she said excitedly. “We’ve learned that at eight o’clock this morning, police, led by Delhi inspector Jagat Prakash Singh, entered Maharaj Swami’s ashram with a warrant for the Godman’s arrest. Apparently, Inspector Singh and his men did encounter resistance inside the ashram. This was of a passive nature. Hundreds of devotees lay down on the ground in front of the entrance to the Godman’s private residence and Singh had to call for reinforcements before they were able to get inside.”

“Was Maharaj Swami there at the time?” The question came from the anchor in the studio.

“My sources tell me he had been in Delhi overnight but arrived back at his ashram this morning at around six by helicopter,” answered Smeeta. “But police say when they…”

Her words were drowned out by a flurry of activity behind her. The camera zoomed in on a scowling Inspector Singh emerging through the gates on foot.

“Sir, sir, sir!” cried the reporters, rushing toward him.

The police wallah stopped as the cameras gathered round and the questions came all at once.

“Have you arrested Maharaj Swami? What are the charges? What’s that smoke we can see rising above the ashram?”

Singh’s gruff voice broke in. “I have a statement to make,” he said. “This morning my men and I entered the Abode of Eternal Love with the intention of arresting the man known as Maharaj Swami on charges of sexual assault, manslaughter and fraud. Our progress was severely hampered by his followers, who blocked our entrance. We were only able to gain access to his private residence a short while ago. So far we have been unable to locate Swami-ji, but we are now conducting a thorough search of the area.”

The reporters started shouting all at once again.

“As to the smoke you can see rising over the buildings,” Singh continued, “a fire started in a room adjacent to Maharaj Swami’s private audience chamber minutes before we entered the building at approximately half past nine. It has since been extinguished, but the contents of the room were destroyed. We have reason to believe the fire was started deliberately.”

More questions were fired at him. Ignoring them, the inspector finished his statement: “One Vivek Swaroop, Maharaj Swami’s number two, is also wanted on the same charges. So far, he is absconding. We will be issuing a photofit of both him and Maharaj Swami within the hour. Anyone seeing these two gentlemen should contact the Delhi police immediately.”

Singh turned and walked back inside the ashram and the gates were slammed shut in the reporters’ faces.

Puri muted the TV and sat back in his chair. “Seems Swami-ji got word about the video footage being released in advance. But his goose is definitely cooked, that is for sure,” he said. “My only regret is Dr. Jha did not live to see the day.”

“He would have been overjoyed, sir,” Elizabeth Rani said, smiling. “But how did you get hold of that shocking material?”

“It was not I, Madam Rani. For that we have Flush to thank.”

“But I read in Facecream’s report that she got no information. Her USB key was destroyed by that thug Vivek Swa-roop.”

By now Elizabeth Rani was standing in front of the detective’s desk.

“That was a masterstroke!” said the detective, beaming. “Unbeknownst even to my good self, the USB key contained a virus. Thus when Facecream inserted it into the Godman’s computer it was delivered. Afterward, Flush was able to penetrate the protection system of the network – ”

“I believe it is known as a firewall, sir,” interjected his secretary helpfully.

“Exactly. So this fiery wall was penetrated and thus the system was accessed. Flush got hold of all the secret accounts. Even Maharaj Swami’s private computer was not immune. That is where the video clip and many more besides were located.”

Elizabeth Rani, looking disgusted, said: “What kind of a man could do something like that to those poor young women?”

“One without any moral compasses. One who is ready to take full advantage of any and all people for his own benefit.”

A philosophical look came over the detective’s face. “Actually, Madam Rani, we Indian people believe that in life a spiritual guide is required, that we cannot find all the answers on our own,” he said. “Like children learning ABC, we need a teacher. This is a belief I hold to be true, also. If we are to escape the cycle of birth and rebirth, a guru must and should be there to show the way. But that does not mean one should follow any Tom, Dick or Harry, no?

“Problem is so many people these days are following these con men without question, ready to believe anything they say and do,” he continued. “If any old Charlie like this Swami-ji can make a watch appear from thin air, they are ready to worship him. But that is not genuine spirituality. Just it is so much hocus-pocus.”

“I agree, sir, people are all too gullible these days,” said Elizabeth Rani. “I suppose that is what Dr. Jha was trying to teach them.”

Mention of the Guru Buster reminded Puri that he needed to bring his file up-to-date with last night’s developments and he asked his secretary to fetch her laptop so she could take dictation.

When he was finished and Elizabeth Rani had saved the file, she said: “Sir, there are a few things I don’t understand. While you were waiting in the hospital room you told Inspector Singh there were two suspects. Who was the other one?”

“Allow me to tell you a little secret, Madam Rani,” answered the detective mischievously. “At that time exactly, I strongly suspected Professor Pandey had been killed for his magical boots. I suspected, also, Manish the Magnificent could be the one. He is a charge sheeter, after all. But other miscreant persons came to mind, also. Those who would have liked the invention for themselves – Maharaj Swami being one other.”