Lydia Dare - A Certain Wolfish Charm

Simon closed his eyes and willed the wind to change direction. Despite his close proximity to nature, he had no ability to force the wind to do his bidding. Had he been human, he would have laughed.

But he wasn't. And never would be. Not truly. Sure, he could pretend to be human most of the time. But he was all beast.

Simon heard footfalls pounding against the soft forest floor. Faster and faster they ran. An animal? He sniffed again. Still no scent. He growled at the injustice of it all.

The wind shifted.

He smelled it.

He smelled her.

Lily.

No.

The footsteps grew louder and louder as she ran. He would evade her. He would go farther into the forest. He would run from her. He turned to do just that.

But then she winced. Simon stood and looked down. He could see her there, stopped at the bottom of the hill. She halted and pulled a thorn from her foot. Maybe that would slow her down.

Not his Lily. She ran even faster than before. She was nearly upon him when he turned to run away.

He heard her voice.

***

A soft rain began to fall. Lily paid it no heed and simply brushed the wet locks of hair from in front of her eyes. She had to find her wolf.

Lily knew it was him the moment she saw him. His black hair shone under the light of the moon. The streak of white that usually graced his temple now shot across one ear and down his back.

"Simon!" she called. He was facing away from her. He was moving in the wrong direction. But she would run forever to catch him. She barely felt the pain in her feet, which were bruised and battered after her barefoot run through the forest.

He didn't turn when she called to him. He ran in the other direction. He moved into the dark until she was unable to tell wolf from shadow.

No!

"Simon," she cried, bending over, the pain of his absence nearly more than she could bear. Lily fell to her hands and knees as tears clouded her vision.

"Don't leave me!" she screamed, the strength of which burned her throat.

A man stepped out of the shadows.

Simon stood completely naked and completely unashamed under the light of the full moon.

"Why are you here, Lily?" he snarled.

She drew in a deep breath, the relief of seeing him nearly palpable.

"Because I need you," she said.

He turned to walk back into the forest. "Go home," he ordered.

"Because I want you!" she cried, louder than before.

He turned and looked at her.

"Because I love you!" she finished.

Lily sat back on her heels and freed her nightrail from around her legs, where she knelt on the ground. Quickly, she tugged it over her head and tossed it to the ground beside her. She sat naked in front of him. She held up her hands, palms facing the sky. "Take me," she cried.

Forty-Six

Simon fought the beast. He fought it with every bit of his body, mind, and soul.

He came to her and kneeled in front of her, his hands sliding into the hair at her temples.

"Why don't you want me?" she sobbed. But gone was the time that he could have gently wiped the tear from her cheek. Instead, he brutally pulled at her hair, tipping her head so that she was forced to look him in the eye.

"You think I don't want you?" he snarled. How could she possibly think that? He wanted her in the worst way. He wanted to pin her beneath him. He wanted to thrust into her until he could spill himself inside her. He wanted to take her. He wanted it more than he wanted his next breath.

Despite the brutal pressure he applied to her scalp with his hands tangled in her hair, she turned her head and pressed her face into his palm.

He couldn't allow her to show gentleness to him. The beast didn't deserve it. The beast wanted nothing more than to hurt her. Why would she turn to him and seek comfort?

Lily reached up to touch Simon's face, and he flinched.

"Don't touch me," he growled.

Yet she persisted. Her hand cupped his cheek. Her thumb brushed across his bottom lip. And Simon gave up control. He allowed the beast to take over.

The pain of the transformation was miniscule compared to the pain in his heart. For he knew that when he showed her his true self, when he came to her in Lycan form, she would turn from him in disgust.

Simon lifted his face to the moon and basked in the light of the night. He dropped to his hands and knees before her and let her watch as his hands became paws with long, black claws, so sharp they dug into the soft, wet earth. Simon watched her face as she watched his. He knew his nose would elongate and his ears would move to the top of his head and become pointy. He'd seen his brothers and others of their kind change. It was a quick process. Yet tonight, it seemed to happen so slowly.

When he was fully Lycan, he stood before her, his face level with hers. He wanted to shout, "Go home! Go to safety!" But now all he could do was whimper. So, he did.

Then the little fool reached a hand toward him. She reached those tiny little fingers out as though she wanted to touch him. Hadn't her mother ever taught her not to touch wild animals?

Simon bared his teeth and growled.

Lily's hand stilled, hanging in the air in mid-reach. He growled again. There, he thought. That is what I am. I am fur and snout and teeth and bite. I am Lycan. I am not human.

Simon closed his eyes and sat very still. He hoped that, when he opened them, she would be long gone. She would come to her senses and leave him. But even more than that, he closed his eyes because he didn't want to see the revulsion on her face he knew would be there. He knew she wouldn't be able to accept him as he was.

Then she touched him. His eyes flew open, and he bared his teeth. He snarled. He would bite her if she wasn't careful.

"There, now," she whispered as a tear slipped from her eye and rode a path down her cheek. "Growl all you want." Then a laugh broke from her throat. She said very softly, "When Emma and I were young, we had these cats in the stables. No one could touch them. They were feral. They hissed and scratched and bit. But I never gave up."

Her hands threaded into the hair at his neck. She stroked him. She touched him. "I'll never give up on you, either, Simon," she said quietly. "Because I love you."

Simon realized that he'd never told her he loved her. All the times he'd pleasured her. All the times he'd held her. He'd never told her. He suddenly felt a burning desire to do so.

Simon gritted his teeth and forced the physical characteristics of the beast to recede. He fought until he kneeled before her again in his human form.

Simon took her face in his human hands, his palms dirty from the mud under his claws, hands that were unable to be gentle. Hands that wanted to bite cruelly into her flesh. She cried out. He instinctively gentled his touch.

Before tonight, he'd never been able to do that. He'd never been able to control the beast.

"Did you hear me? I said I love you." She repeated the words, her eyes searching his.

"I love you

too much

," he snarled, well aware that his lips lifted from his teeth. But unable to force the beast away completely.

"Love me

enough

," she simply said and held out her arms to him.

Simon kneeled before her on shaky legs. His body wanted to be in Lycan form. His mind wanted to stay in human form. His heart wanted to love Lily.

His heart won.

Simon took her face in his hands. "I cannot be gentle," he growled.

"I know," she said. She took his hand in hers and brought it to the curls at the juncture of her thighs. He slid his fingers into her hot, wet body. "I give myself to you, my wolf, because I know you will keep me safe," she said.

He needed no more urging. She cried out when he picked her up and spun her in his arms. He faced her away from him, her bottom cradled in the saddle of his hips. He pressed against her, ready to take her.