Lydia Dare - A Certain Wolfish Charm

"What did he say, Simon?" Lily's voice interrupted his thoughts.

Simon looked up from the letter to find Lily's eyes focused on him. "He'd like for Oliver to come visit them next week. Let the boys get acquainted before the start of term."

"Oh. Well, perhaps the Schofield boy could come here instead."

And have

three

wolves in close proximity to Lily? Not a chance. "I think it would be rude to turn down Schofield's offer, love. Perhaps we can invite the boy some other time." Like when the moon was in its crescent state.

"But Oliver will be leaving us so soon anyway," she said sadly.

Simon pocketed the note and rose from his seat. He walked around his desk and placed his hands on Lily's shoulders. "It'll just be for a few days. He needs this. It'll give him a bit of confidence to start school with."

She nodded her head. "I know you're right."

"Come on, love. We've been doing this long enough. I asked Cook to prepare a basket for luncheon and thought we could enjoy the grounds."

She smiled at him. "That is a lovely idea."

***

Simon took Lily's hand in his as they walked down the garden path. Lily still had trouble reconciling

this

Simon with the dangerous Duke of Blackmoor. He had such a bad reputation, and she knew without a doubt that much of it was earned.

Lily worried her bottom lip between her teeth. She couldn't get the thought of all the perfume-scented letters off her mind. Before they'd left his study, he'd scooped up all the letters with feminine scrawl and tossed them into the wastebasket. Why would he do such a thing? He hadn't read them. Did he have something to hide?

She would like to imagine that the letters meant nothing. But how well did she really know him?

Simon squeezed her hand in his. "Is something bothering you?" His eyebrows drew together.

Lily shook her head. "No. Why do you ask?"

"Because, if you chew on that bottom lip any harder, I'll have to take drastic measures." His eyes twinkled at her, the grey depths reflecting happiness and contentment.

"Drastic measures to do what?"

"To protect those lips I love so much. I might have need of them later." He pulled her closer and touched his lips to hers. "Or now," he murmured, then smiled at her.

He spread a blanket on the soft ground and sat, tugging her fingers until she sat with him, then he drew her to sit between his spread knees. She leaned back against him. The body supporting hers was strong and supple. She sighed with contentment. Yet some doubts still nagged at her.

"Out with it, Lily," he said.

Lily took a deep breath and started. "I never thought I would marry, Simon."

"I am very lucky that some other man didn't snatch you from my path years ago."

"No one was ever very interested in me. You are the first."

"Their loss," he murmured.

"I'm sorry you got stuck with me, Simon," she said, turning to look at him. "But I do need to tell you one thing. And it's something you may not like."

Simon tensed behind her, his body at alert. "Continue."

"I watched Emma change after her marriage to Daniel." Simon inhaled behind her. She turned to look at him. "And I don't think I could stand it if you did to me what Daniel did to her."

"Change in what way?" The calm beneath his voice belied the rigid set of his body. "What did he do to her?"

"Emma was always happy and carefree. She laughed readily. She loved with all her heart. And she loved Daniel."

"If I remember correctly, she had his whole heart as well."

"I'm not so sure."

***

Simon took a breath and tried to remember snippets of conversations he'd had with Daniel about his marriage.

"I'm fairly certain he loved and adored her," Simon could truthfully say.

"Then why did he have relations with other women?" Lily's eyes dodged his, looking everywhere but at his face.

He captured her chin in his hand and waited for her gaze to rise.

"Daniel was faithful. I can attest to that."

"She always thought he had a mistress," Lily whispered.

"She told you that?"

Lily nodded.

"What made her draw that conclusion?"

"The way he left her all the time. He took trips every month." Lily paused, then looked directly into his eyes. "Perhaps you can explain it to me. Maybe you know something I don't."

"Daniel was faithful. He adored Emma."

"A few months after they married, she changed."

"In what way?" Simon had to find out how much she knew.

"She feared him. They were fine for a few months. And then Emma told me Daniel was taking her with him on one of his trips. And she came back changed."

"And what do you think happened?" Simon thought his heart might pound out of his chest.

"I think he hurt her. She told me as much," she blurted out when Simon tried to deny it.

"It wasn't intentional," Simon sighed. How could he possibly ease her pain?

"You know about it?" Lily gasped.

"I don't know details," Simon said, which was true. He had never delved deeper into the relationship than Daniel wanted him to, so he didn't know specifics. "But I have an idea of what happened." The same thing that could happen if Simon took Lily under the light of the full moon.

"What do you know?"

He closed his eyes and tried to arrange his thoughts.

"I know he got too rough with her." Simon shrugged.

"In what way?"

Please

let it go, Lily.

"In what way, Simon?" she prodded.

"Intimately," he confessed. "He scared her intimately." He didn't know how else to verbalize it.

"You mean like when they were together?"

"More like when he was inside her." When he

placed his teeth upon her shoulder. When he tore her flesh. When he marked her as his own.

"Oh." Lily looked confused.

"There are times…" Simon started. Then he stopped.

"Times?"

Simon closed his eyes tightly. "Times when a man, men like Daniel and me, feel like we could lose control."

"Do you feel that way with me?"

"I'm sure I will."

"Simon, you would never hurt me." Her hand moved to cup his face. Such tenderness, even when he revealed some of his inner battle. He didn't deserve it.

Simon kissed her palm. "I wouldn't intend to. And neither did Daniel. Once he realized he was capable of it, he took himself away from her."

"Where did he go? To other women?"

"Never."

"I could never bear it if you left me."

"You're stronger than Emma. You would adjust."

Lily shook her head and touched her lips to his. "I'll have to coerce you to stay."

She could try. But even she couldn't stop the cycle of the moon.

Forty-Two

Simon hated lying to her. He simply detested himself for it. She deserved so much more. But he'd decided before their marriage that she would never know about his Lycan side, so certain measures had to be put in place.

For her safety

. He kept reminding himself that this was

for her safety.

"You're leaving me?" she asked, her hands on her hips.

"I'll only be in London for a few days," he said as he avoided looking into her eyes. If he did, he would confess all his sins. He would tell her every untruth. Then he would watch her turn from him in revulsion. He couldn't bear it. He simply could not.

"Why can't I go with you?" she asked. Her eyes pleaded with him, demanding that he answer.

"You simply cannot. It's not that kind of journey."

"Then what kind of journey is it?" Lily began to pace from one side of the room to the other.

Simon clenched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. He'd been feeling more and more out of control as the days passed. And the night before, he'd nearly taken her too hard when he'd made love to her. She'd cried out when he'd gotten too rough. He couldn't allow himself to hurt her. He surely would if he stayed at Westfield Hall.