hunnyfresh - Letters from War

"It wasn't half the town," Regina defended, leaning back and pulling Emma's leg into her lap. "Besides, it was August's idea."

"Funny how that guy always gets what he wants."

Regina grinned, tucking in closer so that she was pressed against Emma in the corner of the couch. Pale hands rested along the back where they occupied themselves by playing with the strands of silky brown locks.

"Your hair is longer," Emma commented.

Instinctively Regina reached up to pull at the ends of her hair and agreed with a nod. "I suppose Henry and I are both due for a trip to the barber."

"I like it."

Regina blushed.

Tilting her head to give the blonde better access, Regina's eyes fluttered shut at the soft massaging motion deft fingers were doing to her scalp. Small circles at the crown of her head there and nails raking lightly here. The hypnotic movement was so entrancing Regina didn't even realize she was pressed lengthwise on Emma's body until a content breath fluttered across her cheek and a loud heartbeat drummed in her ear.

Regina sat up, forcing Emma to pause in her massaging as she stared down at the younger woman whose lines on her face showed just how much wear and tear she had been through over the course of her life, but the laugh lines around her eyes and lips proved that she had persevered through it all. "I'm sorry," Regina whispered, her hand sneaking up to play with the collar of Emma's shirt. "For snapping at you on the phone."

Emma rolled a noncommittal shoulder. "Don't worry."

"I do." Regina tried to sit up but found she couldn't since Emma had wrapped an arm around her waist and weaved her leg around Regina's. Resigned, she pressed firmly against Emma again and explained. "I do worry about you, and I trust that you'll make sound judgments. The thought of anything happening to you, of losing you, it's . . .absolutely terrifying."

"Nothing is going to happen, Regina."

Clutching the shirt in her fist tightly in some subconscious way to keep Emma close and to make her understand, Regina furrowed her brow as she searched for the right words. "I know. I know you'll always come home, but I have to be realistic that there are risks. Your life is in danger every day, and I don't even think that's all of it." Biting her lip, Regina continued. "What's happening over there that you have to pretend that Henry is your godson?"

Emma frowned, darting her eyes away briefly until the penetrating gaze of imploring brown ones had her returning back to Regina again.

"Is someone bothering you?" Regina asked quietly, hesitantly, fearing the answer she already knew. When Emma didn't answer, Regina demanded in all her mayoral glory. " Who? "

"Nothing absolutely awful has happened," the blonde reasoned though her voice was small and her eyes just couldn't maintain steady eye contact. She had always been good at suppressing her emotions, but there was something about Regina, the way she felt pressed against her, the way brown eyes lightened considerably and widened in vulnerability, the way Emma simply didn't want to lie to her, that made her lose her focus and show a hint of insecurity.

"Emma."

By way of answer, the blonde tilted her head up and caught red lips in a surprise kiss that nearly knocked the brunette off balance. When she pulled back, a hand was cupping Regina's cheek, her thumb stroking a path there that Regina hadn't felt in months. "My General. He suspects about us. Me at least."

Regina's eyes snapped open. "What?"

"I don't know if he's told anyone else, but sometimes it feels like everyone is staring. Even some guys in my squad."

"Won't they discharge you?"

"They haven't yet."

"Can't you say something to someone else? Report him to someone with more authority?"

"He's technically not doing anything he can't make the other guys do," Emma reasoned.

"Like what?"

"Nothing." At Regina's insistent glare, Emma sighed. "Really. He's acting based on speculation."

"Which is rooted in fact," Regina pointed out sharply.

"He just works me harder. That's all."

Regina stared down at the blonde, reevaluating the laugh lines and taking inventory of the minuscule scars that graced her face. A faded cut above her eyebrow. The healing bruise along her jaw. Regina tensed and looked away for a moment, biting her lip in contemplation. "Maybe I shouldn't write as much."

"No." Emma's grip tightened around Regina's waist and her thumb stopped stroking altogether. The fear in her eyes said more than just that she'd miss reading Regina's letters. "Please don't do that."

"I don't want you to get hurt more than you have to."

"You're worth it."

And just like that Regina melted into Emma, into her body, into her words. She pressed their foreheads together, noses nearly touching. Emma tilted up thinking she was going to receive a kiss, but Regina sighed against her and admitted quietly. "You hold too much."

"Too much what?"

" Everything ," Regina said nearly exasperated. She shook her head and tried to sit up again, more successful this time when she pulled Emma up with her by the collar.

Though it looked like Regina wanted to say more, the word nestled in Emma's brain and though it was vague and unclear, she knew with the utmost understanding what the brunette meant. She searched brown eyes that darted for comprehension of her own thoughts, and she saw what she felt within herself.

She could love her.

It was a terrifying word. Love . It was huge and small and the biggest conundrum known to man, but there that was. Loving someone was a huge responsibility. Holding a heart in your hand, it would be so easy to stumble and fall. Emma promised herself she'd never give hers away lightly. She promised to always take care of hers and if someone was brave enough to lend their heart to Emma, she'd protect it because if they were willing then they'd have to be something special, and Regina was more than that. But really, how long had her heart been in Regina's possession? Too long, she thought. Yet not long enough. And there again was this paradox of love that Emma wanted to be swept up in this confusion that was almost so crystal clear and everything and nothing but everything .

That was love.

Between herself and Regina. Of this little family they had unknowingly created. Because what Emma felt was more than just gratitude and deeper than simple care and affection. She could love her. She did love her. But to admit that out loud was a whole other complication, yet it just made the swelling in her heart grow all the more. What neither of them could put into words, or in Emma's case, say out loud, Emma expressed in the only way she knew how. She smiled and cupped Regina's cheeks, easing the brunette from the flurry of her mind with a look that calmed and soothed both women. "Hey."

When the conflict behind Regina's eyes settled, she leaned into Emma's touch. "Hi."

"Is that a good thing?" Emma clarified cautiously. "Holding everything?"

"It's unusual," Regina admitted. "But it's more than good."

"Good because I didn't want to be the only one who thought this was important," she said motioning between them with a nod of her head.

Regina smiled prettily, shaking her head so their noses rubbed and then kissed the blonde lightly just because she could. "You'll be careful, though? When you go back?"

"Aren't I always?" Emma quipped earning a reproachful look from Regina. The blonde grinned and leaned them back against the corner of the couch. "Hell of a second date, huh?"

"I believe you promised me a wedding."

"Dancing. Wine. A cat," she pointed out. "This is even better."

"If these are your standards, I'm anxious to see what the third date brings." Regina rolled her eyes when Emma winked suggestively in response, but before she could play the innocent vixen, Emma joined their lips together. Date number two was getting better already.