Danielle Steel - Full circle

“Where did you get that?” She looked impressed.

“I've been saving it.”

“For what?” He had been saving it for something else, but he decided that enough good things had happened in one day to warrant drinking it.

“For you, you jerk.” She was wonderfully obtuse about the way he felt. But he loved that about her too. She was so engrossed in her studies and her exams and her summer job and her political ideas that she had no idea what was going on right beneath her nose, at least not in regard to him, but he wasn't ready yet anyway. He was still biding his time, afraid to lose.

“It's good stuff.” She took a big gulp of champagne and grinned at him, slightly drunk, happy and relaxed. They both loved their little, house and it was working out perfectly, and then she remembered that she had to ask him something. She had meant to ask him before, but with the rush to move, and buy furniture, she had forgotten to ask. “Listen, by the way, I hate to ask you this … I know it's going to be a drag … but…”

“Oh Jesus, now what? First she forces me to go to law school, and now God knows what other torture she has in mind…” He pretended to look terrified, but Tana looked sincerely grim.

“Worse than that. My mother's getting married in two weeks.” She had long since told him that, but she hadn't asked him to go to the wedding with her. “Will you come with me?”

“To your mother's wedding?” He looked surprised as he set down his glass. “Is that appropriate?”

“I don't see why not.” She hesitated, and then went on, her eyes huge in her face. “I need you there.”

“I take it her charming stepson will be on hand.”

“Presumably. And the whole thing is a little much for me. The happily married daughter with one child and another on the way, Arthur pretending that he and my mother fell in love only last week.”

“Is that what he's saying?” Harry looked amused and Tana shrugged.

“Probably. I don't know. The whole thing is just hard for me. It's not my scene.”

Harry thought it over, looking into his lap. He hadn't been out like that yet, and he had been thinking of going to Europe to meet his Dad. He could stop on the way … he looked up at her. There was nothing he would have denied her, after all she had done for him. “Sure, Tan, no sweat.”

“You don't mind too much?” She looked doggedly grateful to him and he laughed.

“Sure I do, but so do you. At least we can laugh together.”

“I'm happy for her … I just … I just can't play those hypocritical games anymore.”

“Just behave yourself while we're there. We can fly in and I'll head on to Europe the day afterwards. I thought I'd meet Dad in the South of France, for a while.” It was so good to hear him talking about things like that again. It was amazing to realize that only a year before he had been talking about playing for the rest of his life, and now, thank God, he was playing again, at least for a month or two, before he started law school in the fall. “I don't know how I let you talk me into that.” But they were both glad she had. Everything was working out perfectly. They had divided the chores in the house. She did the things he was unable to do, but it was amazing how much he did. Everything from dishes to beds, although he had practically strangled himself vacuuming one week, and now that was her task to do. They were both comfortable. She was about to start her summer job. Both of them thought life pretty damn grand in the summer of '65, and Harry picked up two of the stewardesses on their flight to New York in July. And Tana sat back in her seat, laughing at him, loving every minute of it, and thanking God that Harry Winslow IV was alive.

The wedding was simple and well done. Jean wore a very pretty gray chiffon dress, and she had bought a pale blue one for Tana to wear, in case she herself didn't have time to shop. It certainly wasn't the kind of thing she would have bought herself, and she was horrified when she saw the price tag on it. Her mother had bought it at Bergdorf's, and it was a gift from Arthur, of course, so Tana couldn't say anything.

Only the family were present at the ceremony, but Tana had insisted on bringing Harry along, much to his chagrin, since they arrived from the city in the same limousine. Tana was staying with him at the Pierre. She insisted to her mother that she couldn't leave him alone. And she was relieved that her mother and Arthur were leaving the next day on a honeymoon so she didn't have to stay in New York for an extended period after all. She would have refused to stay in the Greenwich house, and she was going to fly out of New York when Harry did. He was going to Nice to meet Harrison in Saint-Jean-Cap-Ferrat, and she was flying back to San Francisco to her summer job. And Jean and Arthur were threatening to come out and see her in the fall. Her mother looked pointedly at Harry each time she spoke of it, as though she expected him to disappear by then, and eventually Tana had to laugh at it.

“It's really awful, isn't it?” But the worst of all was Billy, who managed to sidle up to her halfway through the afternoon, drunk as usual, and make some sly comment about her boyfriend not being able to get it up, and he'd be glad to help her out anytime, as he recalled she had been a fairly worthwhile piece of ass, but just as she contemplated putting her fist through his mouth, she saw a larger one come whizzing by, meet Billy's chin, and Billy reeled backwards before collapsing neatly on the lawn. Tana turned to see Harry smiling in his wheelchair just behind where she stood. He had reached up and put Billy out cold with one blow and he was immensely pleased with himself.

“You know, I wanted to do that a year ago.” He smiled at her, but her mother was horrified at how they had behaved. And as early as possible Tana and Harry got back into the limousine and went back to New York. There was a tearful goodbye between Tana and Jean before that. Or at least, Jean cried and Tana was tense. Arthur had kissed her on the cheek and announced that she was his daughter now, too, and there wouldn't have to be any more scholarships. But she insisted that she couldn't accept a gift like that, and she couldn't wait to get away from all of them, especially cloying, pregnant Ann, with her whiny voice, her showy gems, and her boring husband, making eyes at someone else's wife halfway through the afternoon.

“Jesus, how can they live like that?” she had fumed to Harry on the way home and he patted her knee.

“Now, now, one day the same thing will happen to you, little one.”

“Oh, go fuck yourself.” He laughed at her and they went back to the Pierre. They were both leaving the next day, and he took her to “21” that night. Everyone was happy to see him there, although chagrined to see that he was in a wheelchair now. And for old time' sake, they drank too much champagne, and were drunk when they got back to the hotel. Just drunk enough for Harry to do something he had promised himself he wouldn't do for another year or two. They were into their second bottle of Roederer, and actually they had been drinking all day, when he turned to her with a gentle look and touched her chin, and unexpectedly kissed her lips.

“Do you know that I've always been in love with you?” At first Tana looked shocked, and then suddenly she looked as though she might cry.

“You're kidding me.”

“I'm not.” Was her mother right? Was Harrison?

“But that's ridiculous. You're not in love with me. You never were.” She focused on him tipsily.

“Oh yes, I am. I always was.” She stared at him, and he took her hand in his. “Will you marry me, Tan?”