Danielle Steel - Irresistible Forces

“Why don't you come over and hang out tonight? I'll rent some videos and we can make popcorn,” he suggested.

“Do you want me to bring the videos?” she offered as she put her work into her briefcase. But she seemed to be taking less and less work home on the weekends. She was spending time with him instead, and not really in the mood to do “homework.”

“Sure, you bring the videos. I'll make dinner for us after the kids eat,” he volunteered. It sounded good to both of them, and Meredith tried not to think of what they were doing. They were living a fantasy that felt good now, but it couldn't go on forever, particularly once Steve found a job and moved to California. No matter how they avoided it now, eventually they knew they'd have to face it. But not yet, she told herself. Not yet. What she was sharing with Cal was too sweet to abandon. She knew it was selfish of her but she couldn't bring herself to break it off yet, no matter how guilty she felt about Steven.

“I'll come over in a couple of hours,” she promised. She wanted to take a bath, and relax, and give him some time with his children before she joined him. She didn't want to wear out her welcome with them.

She drove home to the furnished apartment she was still living in. She still hadn't found a house she liked, and she was spending less time working on it. She'd been busy, and as long as Steve was still in New York, she couldn't see the point of living in the city. And she wanted to stay in Palo Alto to be near Cal now. He had told her she could keep the apartment she had for as long as she wanted.

She let herself into her apartment with her key, and as she walked in, she suddenly had an odd feeling. She sensed, more than saw anything different. There was just an eerie feeling as she walked into her living room, and set down her briefcase, and as she did, Steve walked out of her bedroom with a huge bouquet of flowers. She nearly jumped a foot when she saw him. The last thing she expected was to see Steve there.

“What are you doing here?” she said, as though he were an intruder, and he looked at her with an odd expression, as he walked toward her with the flowers.

“I thought you'd be happy to see me,” he said, looking disappointed.

“I am.” She covered her tracks immediately, and moved toward him. “I just … I didn't expect … you said you were working this weekend.”

“I wanted to surprise you,” he said, setting the flowers down on the coffee table. He put his arms around her then, and she prayed that he wouldn't sense any resistance. She hadn't seen him since things had changed with Cal, and she was desperately afraid that he might sense it. But she was sure he didn't when he kissed her. “Happy Valentine's Day, Merrie,” he said happily, pleased with what he'd accomplished. It had been obvious from her expression that she didn't expect him, and her mind was racing.

“What a great surprise!” she said valiantly, and he didn't tell her it had been Anna's suggestion.

“I figured it was easier for me to come out than to get you away from your work here. You'd better be free this weekend. I want to take you out to dinner tomorrow.” So did Cal, she thought almost the moment he said it. But that was impossible now. She had to spend Valentine's Day with her husband. As long as he had gone to the trouble to come out, she knew she had to spend every moment with him. And it seemed like something of a mixed blessing to her. “So what'll we do tonight?” he beamed at her. He knew what was at top of his list, but after that, he was thinking of taking her to dinner or a movie.

“I don't know. Why don't we just stay here?” She felt completely disoriented, and for some odd reason, she felt as though she were entertaining a stranger. Having slept with Cal, she felt as though her whole life was out of balance.

“I can cook if you want,” Steve offered, “or we can order a pizza.”

“Sure, sweetheart,” she said amiably, “whatever you want. You must be exhausted.” At least she hoped so, but he looked surprisingly refreshed, despite the time difference and the endless string of days he'd been working.

“I slept on the plane, I feel great actually.” He put his arms around her again then, “I've really missed you.” They hadn't seen each other in five weeks, and for three weeks she had allowed herself the delusion that he no longer existed. But he was all too real now.

“I've missed you too,” she lied, feeling flustered and awkward as she moved his flowers to the dining room table, and thanked him. But as he watched her, he didn't know why, but he sensed that something was different between them. Maybe it was the surprise, and she hadn't had time to absorb it.

“How was your week?” he asked casually.

“Okay.”

“It sounds like you've been working day and night since Hawaii.” He'd called her, but she had hardly ever answered, and she'd only spoken to him from the office, because Cal had been there every evening.

“I've been pretty busy,” she said vaguely.

“Why don't I take a shower, and we can relax for a while,” he said with a smile. She knew what that meant. Sometimes when they'd been apart for awhile, making love got them back on track and comfortable with each other again, but this time, at the thought of it, she felt panicked.

“I'd love that, but I've got one bit of bad news.” She actually blushed as she said it, for a variety of reasons.

“What's that?” He looked momentarily worried.

“It's the wrong time of the month for hot romance….” She tried to let him come to his own conclusions.

“You've got your period?” She nodded. It wasn't true, but she suddenly realized that she didn't want to deal with the physical aspects of her double life, and their complicated situation. She hadn't had time to prepare herself for what it would mean when she next saw him. “That's no big deal,” he smiled at her. “It never used to bother us when we were in college, did it?” She looked stunned and felt trapped when he said it. “If we're going to live on separate coasts, we're going to have to take what comes, if you'll pardon the pun, when we do see each other.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, as he disappeared into the bedroom to undress and take a shower. And when she heard the water running, she reached for the phone and dialed Cal. He answered on the second ring, and was happy to hear her voice.

“When are you coming over? I bought a couple of steaks, and a nice bottle of wine.”

“I can't come,” she said quickly.

“Why not? Is something wrong?” He could hear the strain in her voice, and although she didn't need to, she was almost speaking in a whisper.

“Steve is here. He surprised me.” There was a long pause, and a painful silence.

“I see … well, that's interesting. To what do we owe the pleasure … no, let me guess. He came out for Valentine's Day, for a little romance.” Cal sounded cynical to cover his hurt as he said it. But it was the price he had to pay for having an affair with a married woman.

“I guess so. I don't know, Cal.” Now she was lying to him too. The dream was slowly turning into a nightmare, but they had known it would. They had been kidding themselves for the past few weeks, but now the truth was staring them both in the face. The only one who didn't know what was happening was Steven. “I can't see you tomorrow,” she said sadly.

“Obviously.” And then he seemed to recover. “It's all right, Merrie. I understand.” They had put off having any discussion about their future because they realized that until Steve appeared they could live the fantasy. But now he was here and they had to face the truth and all its implications. “We'll have dinner next week and talk about it. I'll see you on Monday. I assume he's going back Sunday night on the red-eye.” In spite of himself, he sounded hopeful.