Danielle Steel - The Ranch

“Are you okay?” Tanya asked as soon as she came in, wondering how she would explain what she was doing outside, but she didn't have to. Zoe had guessed, and didn't press her about it. “You look sick.”

“I'm all right,” she said unconvincingly, and Tanya could see that she was shaking from head to foot, and she was really worried.

“Zoe?” Tanya looked at her with wide, worried eyes, and Zoe just shook her head. She didn't want to talk about it. “Go to bed, I'll make your tea for you.” Zoe went back to bed gratefully, and Tanya came in with a cup of mint tea a few minutes later. Zoe was still shaking but she looked a little better. Tanya handed Zoe the mug, and sat down on the edge of the bed. “What's happening?” she asked, looking worried.

“Not much. Just a bug.” But somehow, Tanya didn't believe her.

“Do you want me to call a doctor?”

“Of course not. I am a doctor. I've got everything I need here.” She had her AZT, a host of other medicines, she even had a shot she could give herself if the diarrhea got out of control again. She nearly hadn't made it to the bathroom. That would have been beyond awful, and it would have taken a lot of explaining.

They sat there for a while, just thinking, both of them, as Zoe sipped her tea and then lay back on the pillows. She looked at her old friend and felt she had to say something. “Tanny… be careful… what if he's not what you think… what if he sells his story to someone… or hurts you. You don't really know him.” Tanny wondered how Zoe had known, she was one sharp bird, and she smiled as she listened to her. None of it was impossible, but her instincts told her he was genuine, and she usually only got in trouble when she ignored her instincts.

“I think he's all right, Zoe. I know that sounds crazy, because I hardly know him. But he keeps reminding me of Bobby Joe.”

Zoe smiled at her wanly. “The funny thing is he reminds me of him too. But the fact is he isn't Bobby Joe, He's his own person. And he could do a lot of things to hurt you.” The price the tabloids put on her head was a big one. They would have paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for a story about her. Especially this one. Not to mention pictures,

“I know that,” Tanya said cautiously. “And the truth is it's remarkable that I'm still willing to trust anyone, but I am. I may be crazy, but I trust him.”

“You may be right,” Zoe said fairly. She had always been fair, even when they were young. It was one of the many things Tanya loved about her. “Just don't give your heart away too fast, you only get one, and it's a mess to repair once it gets broken.” The two women exchanged a long, slow smile. Zoe would have liked nothing better than to see Tanya find the right guy and be protected.

“What about your heart?” Tanny asked her, as Zoe set her mug down. And she was looking a little better. “Why have you been alone for so long? Is it broken?”

“No,” she said honestly, “just full of other people's stories. There's never enough time… and now there's my baby. I don't need more than that.”

“I don't believe you,” Tanya said wisely, “we all do.”

“Maybe I'm different,” Zoe said, but she looked sad, and sick and lonely, and Tanya wished she could do more for her. She had always loved her like a sister, and Zoe did so much for so many. She was truly a saint of sorts, and Tanya was worried that she looked so ill and was so exhausted. There was no one to take care of her normally, to nurture her, and do for her what she did for others. But she was looking sleepy now, and Tanya turned off the light and kissed her forehead.

“Get some sleep, and if you don't feel better in the morning, I'm calling a doctor.”

“I'll be fine,” she said, closing her eyes, and she was almost asleep before Tanya left the room. She stood in the doorway for a moment and looked at her. Zoe was already asleep by then, and she was smiling.

And as Tanya walked back to her own room, her thoughts drifted back to Gordon. She knew Zoe was right. He could do terrible things to her and really hurt her. She was the most vulnerable person she knew, and she couldn't afford the same emotional luxuries as other people. He could write an unauthorized biography, or give an interview to the tabloids, he could take photographs of her and blackmail her if she let him, he could do anything from extort money from her to kill her. But how could she live constantly worrying about things like that? And she was always so circumspect and so careful. And now suddenly in three days she had fallen head over heels in love with a cowboy. It was insane, and yet nothing in her life had ever felt more right, or saner. And as she slipped into bed after she brushed her teeth and put her nightgown on, all she could think of was how he looked that night when she told him she'd sung the anthem for him. And all she cared about was to be with him again, in the morning. And as she fell asleep, she could see his face, his eyes, as he rode the bronco… his green-and-silver chaps flying… his hand held high… she was singing for him… and he was smiling.

Chapter 16

The day after the rodeo, when Mary Stuart woke up, she heard noises just outside her bedroom. She put her dressing gown on and walked into the living room, and she found Tanya there, fully dressed and looking worried.

“Is something wrong?” She didn't even tease her about being up at that hour, and already in boots and blue jeans.

“It's Zoe. I think she's been up all night. She won't tell me what's wrong. She thinks it's a flu of some kind, but Stu, she looks really awful.” A thousand horrible possibilities crossed their minds from ulcers to cancer. “I think she should go to the hospital, but she doesn't want to.”

“Let me take a look at her,” Mary Stuart said quietly, but when she saw her, she was momentarily shocked into silence. Zoe's face was so pale, it was a fluorescent green, and she was dozing. She stood there for a minute, and then they walked out of the room together.

“My God,” Mary Stuart said, horrified, “she looks awful. If she doesn't go to the hospital, we should at least have someone come here to see her,” she said with complete conviction, and Tanya was relieved to hear her say it.

Tanya called the manager and asked if there was a doctor nearby who could make a house call. They asked what the problem was and she said only that one of her friends was extremely ill, they didn't know what it was, but it could easily have been appendicitis or something that needed immediate treatment.

Charlotte Collins, the owner, called back instantly, and she said she'd have a doctor to them half an hour later.

“You don't suppose it's something serious, do you?” Tanya asked Mary Stuart as they waited, and Mary Stuart only shook her head, looking worried.

“I just wish I knew. I hope it's not. But she works awfully hard. Hopefully, it'll turn out to be nothing.”

True to her word, Charlotte Collins had Dr. John Kroner there at eight-thirty. He was a young man, with athletic good looks, he looked as though he had played football in college. And it was obvious when he came in that he knew he was coming to see Tanya Thomas. He tried not to look impressed, but he couldn't help it, and she smiled warmly at him, and tried to tell him about Zoe.

“What do you think is wrong with her?” He sat down, looked at her intently, and listened.

“I don't know. She looks pale to me all the time, and she's tired, but she seemed all right actually until yesterday. She said she had the flu, there was something wrong with her stomach. She was absolutely green, and shaking violently last night. She was up until about two o'clock, and this morning, she looks a lot worse and she has a fever.”