Shirley Murphy: Murphy_Shirley_Rousseau_Cat_Coming_Home_BookFi

It was black night when they reached the mountains. Moving along the narrow back roads, theirs was soon the only car. Moonlight fingered the tips of the pines, and flashed between the trees into the moving vehicle. They met no oncoming lights and they passed no clearing in the forest where any faintest house light flickered, they were alone, content with one another as Benny napped peacefully against Maudie and she herself dozed.

And then the blazing lights. The gunshots. The wreck. Easing up, Maudie caught her breath as pain seared through her shoulder. In the front seat, the newlyweds lay unmoving, a dark huddle; they made no cry, no smallest sound. The children clung to Maudie, Benny’s arms so tight that pain shocked through her hurt shoulder, making her vision swim; she clung to the child, dizzy and sick. The night was so black, silent except for the dying ticking of their wrecked car. She cried out to Martin but he didn’t answer, nor did Caroline. She tried to wedge her way into the front to find Martin’s hand, or Caroline’s, to feel for a pulse. She was sick with the terrible, certain knowledge they were dead. They were alone on the deserted mountain road, no one to help them, no one to know what had happened. No one but the killer.

Maudie tried to find her purse, find her cell phone, wondering if, in that desolate mountain area, a 911 call would get through to anyone, wondering if her signal, impeded by the ragged peaks, could possibly reach a tower and be relayed to the local sheriff or the CHP. Or would her call simply die, smothered among the ridges and pinewoods? She thought of a gasoline fire but could see no lick of flame starting among the wreckage. The children clung to her, silent and shivering. As she searched for her purse, for the phone, the pain that surged through her brought tears spurting.

Later she remembered only fragments: the children climbing over into the front seat to their parents even as Maudie tried to stop them. At once, Gracie and Benny started to scream, Gracie’s high-pitched little voice screaming, “Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama …” unable to stop. Twice Benny said, “Papa,” then he began to retch.

It was so dark, the moon’s light blocked now by the mountain of the car itself towering over them. Maudie abandoned the search for her purse, and rummaged through the pockets of the backseat trying to find a flashlight—but she didn’t dare shine a light on Martin and Caroline, didn’t dare let the children see them torn and bleeding. She prayed they weren’t dead, prayed they would live, they were all these children had. Death wouldn’t be fair, not for this warm, happy, newly formed family.

But the words “fair” and “right” were arbitrary, they had no connection to real life. Were those concepts applicable in the dimension larger than life, a dimension that neither she nor anyone alive was equipped to understand?

Swallowing back the pain in her shoulder, she reached between the bucket seats, feeling for the children. She felt Gracie huddled down against Caroline, her arm slick with Caroline’s blood. Maudie tried to squeeze through between the headrests and the headliner, but Benny swarmed back away from Martin, screaming and crying, pressing her down again. Gracie followed him in a panic, and then Ronnie, the three children clinging and shivering, weeping uncontrollably in their terror and grief.

Later she remembered hugging the children, feeling sick and dizzy with pain. She remembered finding her phone, making the call, but after that the memories became disjointed. She thought a lot of time had passed in pain and blackness until, what seemed hours later, the sound of sirens startled her from half consciousness, and lights blazed in, blinding her, blinding the children …

Even now, eight months later, her memories of the shooting and crash were still tangled. She had lucid moments, and long spaces lost in between that she couldn’t bring back: waking in a moving vehicle, strapped down to a cot, unable to move or sit up. Not knowing where the children were, crying out for the children. A man’s voice, trying to calm her. Waking to a loud insistent thumping that terrified her until the man told her she was in a helicopter. Recognizing, then, the thunder of its propellers, as the white-coated medic leaned over her, telling her the children were right there with her, that they were not badly hurt. Seeing the three children, then, huddled together with blankets around them, and the medic asking her about family, asking who they should call. She tried to tell them where, in her purse, to look for the phone numbers of her older son, David, and of Caroline’s sister. Everything happened in torn fragments, ragged and not quite fitting together, a nightmare puzzle that would never, ever leave her. She remembered the loud, slamming wind of the copter’s blades above her as the door opened and she was lifted out on the stretcher, uselessly crying out for the children.

She remembered waking in a cage of metal bars, trying to pull herself up, then seeing the tubes sticking out of her arm confining her, holding her down, remembered yanking at them trying to get free until a nurse grabbed her hands. She fought the nurse, screaming for Martin, screaming his name over and over …

It had taken her a long time, in the hospital, to face the truth that lay silent and dark within her, to face the fact that Martin and Caroline were dead, to face the grief she didn’t want and didn’t know how to deal with. A long time to understand that Martin’s and Caroline’s bodies had been transported to the county morgue to await a coroner’s autopsies. A long time to believe what the doctors and police told her, that the three children were safe, that they were in a motel nearby with Caroline’s sister, who had flown out from Miami. It took her a while to understand that her older son, David, would arrive from Georgia that evening. Not until Caroline’s sister, Maryanne, arrived at the hospital with the children, until Maudie saw for herself that the three children were all right, did that part of the nightmare begin to subside.

Gracie and Ronnie, subdued and pale, clung to Maryanne, needing their aunt, whose golden hair and warm smile so resembled Caroline. Now Maryanne, and David, and Maudie herself, were all the children had left to love and nurture them.

2

IN THE SMALL village of Molena Point, far above L.A. on the central California coast, chief of police Max Harper and his tall, redheaded wife, Charlie, had just returned from an early evening ride up into the hills above the sea cliffs. In their cozy stable, as they unsaddled the horses, their conversation centered around plans for their annual pre-Christmas potluck. Max’s buckskin gelding and Charlie’s sorrel mare stood in cross ties between the two rows of stalls as Max and Charlie checked their feet for stones and then rubbed them down. At the end of the alleyway beyond the open barn doors, their green pastures spread away between white fences, allowing a glimpse of the sea beyond. The weather was warm for late November, the ocean breeze welcome; though in a few days, the local weather guru had forecast, a cold spell could be expected.

“That would be nice for the Christmas party,” Charlie said, “cold weather, and a fire on the hearth.” Usually, the Harpers hosted the casual buffet there at the ranch where they had ample parking for police vehicles and the cars of their civilian friends. This year, because of the rash of home invasions that had descended on the village, their friends and the personnel of Molena Point PD would gather in the heart of the village, at the Damens’ house, where officers on patrol could stop by on their dinner breaks, while their wives and families could linger on for a more leisurely visit. The invasions were worrisome, as the department had made no arrests and thus far had no good leads. Max had doubled patrols and extended officers’ hours, and many vacations had been canceled, the added costs stretching the department’s budget thin enough to cancel Max’s order for four new squad cars—and leaving Max short-tempered and abrupt, reining himself in with a far harder hand than he ever controlled his buckskin gelding.