Jon Gordon - The Garden - A Spiritual Fable About Ways to Overcome Fear, Anxiety, and Stress

“Self-doubt ironically doesn't come from self. Remember that,” said Mr. Erwin. “God made you perfectly and you are the way you are for a reason and a purpose. The fact that you doubt who you are and your future means the enemy is filling your mind with doubt. You would never do that to yourself. Your identity is being attacked and the bullying is a painful experience that is reinforcing this doubt and causing you to forget you are a child of God.”

“I have all these doubts about my ability to do well in cheering, said Kay. “I worry I'm going to make a mistake. I worry people will find out I'm not really that good. I worry I'm going to let my coaches and team down.”

“That's because the enemy is filling your mind with these doubts and fears, said Mr. Erwin. You would never choose doubt so remember these doubts aren't coming from you. These doubts appear and then you feel like you must be perfect to compensate. You don't trust God so you try to be perfect like God. But you aren't perfect and you know this and it causes a lot of stress.”

“I know,” said Kay, as she lifted up her sleeves to show Mr. Erwin the cuts on her wrist.

Mr. Erwin took a step closer towards Jay and Kay. He faced them and put his hands on their shoulders. “I know what you are going through. My sweet daughter went through the same thing. You are not alone. You must trust, trust, trust,” he said. “Not in yourself but in God.” Mr. Erwin then gestured his arm to all the trees lining the perimeter of the backyard. “Remember, God told Adam and Eve that they could eat from all the trees of the Garden. But what did the serpent do? He was able to create doubt that God can't be trusted and as a result got them to focus instead on the one tree they couldn't eat from. God provided abundance and the enemy was able to get them to focus on what they lacked.

“The enemy is doing the same to both of you. You both have so many God-given talents and the enemy is causing you to doubt God, doubt yourself, and focus on what you lack instead.”

Jay and Kay looked at each other and then at Mr. Erwin. He could see the sadness on their faces.

“Don't let this bring you down,” he said. “The enemy is very skilled at creating doubt. So skilled that he has even convinced many that God doesn't exist. Like this world and universe could somehow happen by accident. Like all of this somehow randomly and accidently came together. Somehow we are just the right distance from the sun and have just the right amount of oxygen and all the conditions and our ecosystem magically and somehow accidentally work together to create and sustain life. Come on! So many forget we are living on a liquid rock traveling through space around a great ball of fire we call the sun at 60,000 mph and spinning 1,000 mph.

“The enemy is good at convincing people to ignore God's miracles that exist all around them. So don't blame yourself. You didn't know how the battle was being waged but now you do. Now you know it starts with Doubt. The enemy knows if he can get you to doubt God you will believe his lies. And if you believe his lies you won't trust God. It's a game of deception but we are on to it. This leads us to the next D's, and they are Distort and Discourage.”

Chapter 6

Distort and Discourage

Mr. Erwin grabbed another piece of fruit from the forbidden tree and continued, “The enemy creates doubt by lying to us. He distorts truth with lies. As I told you the other day, the truth was Adam and Eve were made in God's image and the enemy convinced them they weren't. The truth was if they ate from the forbidden tree God said they would die, and the enemy said God was lying and they would not die. The enemy made it seem like God was trying to keep them from becoming like Him, when in fact God told them not to eat from the tree so they could continue to be like him. The enemy lied to them, and he continues to lie to us.

“Those negative thoughts we talked about the other day. They are lies you would never choose to think yourself. The enemy is a liar, and he's always trying to fill your mind with lies.”

“Yeah, about that,” said Kay. “Jay and I were talking about this the other day and it sure feels like those negative thoughts are coming from us. They are in our head, after all.”

“I know it does,” Mr. Erwin said as he threw the piece of fruit towards the back of the yard. “But that's how deceptive the enemy is. I don't know how it works but I know the thought comes in so fast that you think it's from you. The lie is in your head and you believe it. Then you reinforce it by repeating it to yourself. You identify with it, and it becomes a part of your identity. You may even reinforce it further by telling others. Then you feel discouraged. That's the third D. Discourage. The enemy distorts truth with lies to cause you to doubt and become discouraged.”

“That's me,” said Jay. “The negative thoughts get in my head, and I get so down I just want to give up. Of course I don't give up.”

“Because I won't let him,” interjected Kay.

“She's right,” said Jay. “But while I don't give up, I beat myself up for being negative. I feel like a loser. I get mad at myself. I look in the mirror and I can't stand myself.”

“I know that feeling well,” said Mr. Erwin, wishing he could punch the enemy in the face but knowing that wasn't the solution. “I had the same challenges growing up. My kids did too. Here's the deal. The enemy knows he can't beat you himself. So what does he do?”

“He gets us to beat ourselves,” said Kay, who was beginning to see things more clearly.

“Yep, said Mr. Erwin. “He fills our minds with lies. Lies that we aren't enough. That our future is hopeless. That we don't have what it takes to succeed. That no one loves us or will love us. That our best days are behind us. That we aren't smart enough, tall enough, good enough. That our dream won't happen. That our mistakes of the past define us.”

“That we are going to mess up on stage in front of thousands of people,” shouted Kay.

“That I'll never make it as a film maker,” shouted Jay.

“That life is pointless without my wife,” Mr. Erwin shouted with them.

They all stood silent for a few seconds as they looked at the two trees in front of them.

“We don't give up because it's hard,” Mr. Erwin said softly. “We give up because we get discouraged. The enemy lies to us so that we will make a bad choice or so that we will get discouraged and give up. And in many cases the bad choices come first, we get discouraged by the outcomes our choices produce and we give up as a result. The enemy doesn't beat us. Through the lies we believe, he gets us to beat ourselves.”

“So what's the answer?” asked Kay. “I mean if those thoughts are always coming in and we can't stop them, what do we do?”

“You recognize the lies,” said Mr. Erwin. “And you don't believe them. Just because you have a negative thought doesn't mean you have to believe it. Don't believe the lies. And don't beat yourself up for the thoughts in your head that are not coming from you. No more guilt, discouragement, or shame.

“That sounds good to me,” said Jay as he high-fived Mr. Erwin.

“There is great freedom in knowing you are not the source of your negative thoughts,” Mr. Erwin said passionately as he raised his voice. “You don't have to blame yourself anymore. You can recognize the lies, choose not to believe them, and know the positive truth. You are loved. You have value. You are worthy. You are a child of God. You are loved by God. There is a plan for your life. You have greatness inside of you and in every moment, you have the capability to do great things. The best is yet to come if you choose to believe it.”