Brayden, Melissa - How Sweet It Is

“And got me through the darkest year of my life.” He was right. He had always been her soft place to fall, so of course she let go of emotion when she was with him. It’s what they did.

“Tell me what went wrong.”

Molly blew out a breath, wiped the tears from her cheeks, and explained the series of events at the birthday party. The complications they faced when it came to Jordan’s parents, and the guilt she continually struggled with herself regarding Cassie. She raised a shoulder helplessly. “I pulled away from her that night. We were supposed to spend the weekend together, and I could barely look her in the eye after everything. The next thing I knew, she ended things. Said we were heading in different directions.”

“Are you?”

“I don’t know. I wish I did. We felt in sync in almost every way. At least that was my impression.” She thought on it and countered. “No, it was hers too. I know it was.”

He thought for a minute. “Maybe she sensed just how hard all of this was on you and did what she thought was noble.”

She let the idea settle. “She was trying to let me off the hook?”

“It’s possible.”

She shook her head. “I screwed everything up, Dad. I held parts of myself back from her because I felt like they belonged to someone else. I didn’t fully see it then, but I do now. Because I wasn’t ready, I may have blown the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” She shook her head. Letting Jordan go was breathtakingly stupid and now she couldn’t imagine why she’d done it.

He sat forward in his chair. “And what are you going to do about it?”

“I don’t know that there’s anything I can do.”

He shot her a frustrated look. “You have to take control of your own life, Molly. I can’t leave this world—”

“Dad, don’t say that.”

“Let me finish,” he said sternly. The intensity in his tone shut her up immediately. “I know it’s not fun to talk about, but this is what it comes down to. I’m sick, and little by little, I feel my strength slipping away.” He reached out and clutched her hand in his. “I can’t stand the thought of leaving this world knowing you’re not okay, do you hear me?”

“Yes, sir,” she said solemnly.

“You’re a fighter, Molly, but sometimes you forget that. I don’t want you to walk through life alone. Now, you’ve been dealt some tough blows along the way, but those trials don’t define you. You can’t let them hold you back from getting out there and living.” There was fire in his eyes as he continued. “If you love this girl, damn it, you go out there and get her. The rest of the world will just have to deal with it. And if it’s guilt that’s eating you alive, well, then you figure out how to deal with that too because life is too short. Understand me?”

“I do.” And she did understand. More than she ever had. His words washed over her in a call to action. Suddenly, she was feeling motivated.

She had work to do.

*

There are some days that feel more important than others.

When Molly woke up the next morning, she knew that the day before her would be one of those. She’d scheduled herself on the second shift at Flour Child and took the morning for herself. She had a quiet cup of coffee and watched Rover swim his morning laps as she pulled her thoughts together and geared up for what was ahead.

She walked to the flower shop and enjoyed the bright sunlight the morning had to offer. Everything in her path just seemed to encourage her forward. The most noticeable encouragement being the date, the eighth of June. Eight . She hadn’t planned it out that way. It had to mean something.

As she approached the graveside, she took stock. She’d spent a lot of time here over the past few years. It was her Wednesday and she valued her Wednesdays and everything that came with them. It was a place she came to for comfort, to talk, or to simply decompress from a long day. But standing here now felt different. She was nervous as she listened to the sound of her own heartbeat. Remembering her purpose and the importance of what she needed to do, she made herself comfortable in the grass next to Cassie’s headstone.

“Hey, you,” she said, arranging the flowers in the small vase and tucking it into the grass. “It’s an absolutely gorgeous morning. The kind you used to love.”

She closed her eyes and pictured Cassie’s face, the soft breeze that would have played in her hair on such a day. “I wish I could say things have been easy lately. They haven’t been and I’m beginning to understand why. That’s kind of what I came here to talk about.” She took a deep breath because this woman was everything to her once. The love of her life. But that somehow seemed like a different life now. “I’ve missed you so much these past four years, Cassie, but I’ve carried you with me every step of the way. Know that. Our life together wasn’t perfect, but it was ours, and I loved you deeply. You were my first love, and that will never change.”

She ran her hand reverently across the letters of Cassie’s name, the date she was born, the date she died and willed herself forward as hot tears sprang into her eyes. “But the thing is, I have to take a new step in my life. And that means I have to move on from us. From you. It’s time to tuck our pictures away and close that chapter of my life. I need to have my heart free.”

She took a moment. “I’ve fallen in love with someone, which means in some ways, I have to say good-bye to you. I promise I’ll be back here every once in a while, Cass, but it won’t be the same.” She closed her eyes as the full meaning of those words took hold. It was hard to move on from someone you loved, even when they’d been gone from your life for a while. Even when you knew it was the right thing to do.

The tears slid down her cheeks now, but she didn’t wipe them away. There was an ache in her heart that she allowed herself to feel to its fullest. Because she needed to feel it. This was the end of something that had been a part of her for a very long time. It was a poignant and important moment in her life, and no matter how much it hurt, she would be present for it. As the tree branches rustled nearby and a sparrow chirped in the distance, she let herself cry one last time for Cassie.

But as she raised her face to sunlight overhead, something remarkable happened.

The pain receded.

And what washed over her in its place was a sense of peace and hope and excitement for what lay ahead. It was the most wonderful gift and she knew immediately who’d sent it. “Thank you,” she whispered. “You’d be so proud of her, Cass. She’s grown into the most amazing woman.”

She kissed her fingers and placed them gently on the granite, whispering one final message. “I’m so grateful for the love we shared. Good-bye, Cassie.”

She stood and wiped the remnants of tears from her cheeks. She took a deep breath and began walking toward her new life.

Chapter Twenty-seven

“Sugar, do you want the copper mixing bowls in the big box or packed separately?” Eden placed her hands on her hips as she awaited an answer.

“Big box is fine,” Molly answered absently. She stared at the framed photo on the wall of her and her dad when she was six years old. Her face and hands were covered in flour, and she was standing on a step stool to reach the counter. Her father beamed at the camera from alongside her.

She loved that photo.

Her eyes brushed past it daily in the course of customers and recipes and deliveries. But that photo was what it had been all about.

Reverently, she lifted it from the hook on the wall and held it in her hands. It was so lightweight for the amount of value it carried within.