The Bellmaker - Jacques, Brian - Redwall 07 - The Bellmaker

Zzzzz. Clunk!

Grinj fell poleaxed by a smooth, round rock with a hole through its center. It was attached to a thin, toughened line. Grinjs arrow buried itself in the sand alongside the mousemaids eye as a deep, drawling voice called from the hilltop behind her.

“Paws still in the blinkin ranks than! If any of you longtails have half a bally brain, Ill drop you before you can use it! You showah listenin? Thats not just a bloomin order, its a fact!

Mariel watched in amazement as the stone was reeled swiftly in by a hare carrying a long, whippy fishing rod. He caught the stone skillfully as it swung back to him, his hooded eyes never once leaving the scene below. Holding the slack of the line in check, he whipped the slender rod back and forth, and the air hummed to its vibrations. Suddenly Bragglins paw grasped that of Mariel as he tried to wrest the dagger from her.

Zzzzzzz. Thonk!

With a swift, vicious flick the hare cast the stone deftly. The breath caught in Mariels throat. Bragglin lay slain, the flying rock squarely between his eyes.

“You chaps never learn, do yen? Didnt believe me, eh? Right, whos next?

The rats dropped their weapons as they gaped up at the curious hare. Young Bowly Pintipss mouth hung wide; he had never witnessed such a splendid-looking beast.

The hare was old and overweight, but obviously every inch a veteran warrior; his regalia proclaimed it proudly for all to see. On his head he wore a tricorn hat, with holes cut to allow his ears to pop out. It was surmounted by the most elaborate white drooping plume. Though his cheeks were pouched and baggy, the eyes that shone above them were hooded and sharp. His whiskers had been waxed and curled into a perfect handlebar moustache. He wore a faded but gaudy pink mess jacket, decorated with arrays of medallions and ribbons. He had epauletted shoulders and a front twinkling with polished silver buttons. Stowing the rod away like an elongated pace stick, he gave a cough and a nod. Four young leveret hares in quaint green uniforms nipped smartly out of the surrounding grass and saluted him. He acknowledged them with a wave of one ear.

“Righto, quick as ylike now, squad. Pick up all weapons an lay those rats facedown where theyre no bother to anybeast ...

One of the leverets sprang forward but skidded to a halt at a fierce glare from his superior.

“Whatve I told you, laddie buck? Wait for it, wait for it Right, go to it, squad ... Move!

The young hares scurried about gathering up all weapons. One was about to relieve Dandin of his spear when he caught the stern eye of his elder.

“Teh, ten! Cant ytell the good chaps from the rotters, Runtwold? Leave that mouses weapon alone, sah!

Pulling off his hat, he strode ponderously down the hill. Bending a leg in front of Mariel, he bowed with a totally overdone flourish. “Field Marshal Meldrum Fallowthorn at yservice, marm. Though me reputation oft precedes me, no doubt youve heard mname bandied about hither and yon, wot?

Mariel could only shake her head.

“Whats this? Theres a thing! said the hare, raising his eyebrows. “Never heard of old Meldrum the Magnificent? Astoundin! Never mind, mdear, you will!

Introductions were in order all around. The moles thanked their rescuers profusely, the old one tugging his snout respectfully to the warriors who had saved them.

“Burrhurr, thankee koindly, guddbeasts. Oi be Furpp Straightfurrer, an these yurr hinfants be moi daughters lotBurdill, Grumbee, an Porgoo, Straightfurrers all. Bid ee gennelbeasts good day, moles.

The three little ones tugged their snouts politely. “Good arternoon, zurrs! Foin day, marm!

Meldrum turned his attention to the rats lying with their noses pressed into the sand. “Now then, yblaggards, up on those paws smart I ike. One, two, hup!

The rats did as they were bidden with alacrity. Meldrum prodded one in the stomach with his rod butt. “Now listen hard, ygreat stinker. Im promotin you pro tern offisah of this mob. See that hill yonder? Well, if you aint all over it an1 gone in two flicks of me eye, Ill make rat pudden with the lot of yah, understand?

The rat nodded, knowing his life depended on it.

Meldrum signaled to his leveret squad and Mariels group. “Weapons at the ready, shoot at will if they dont move quick enough. Aim for between the shoulder blades. Righto, attention, verminon my command of run, youll flippin well run for ylives. Got it? Good, ready ... Run!

Sand scattered in all directions as the terrified rats fled, stumbling helter-skelter over the hill. In an amazingly short time, they were gone from sight. Field Marshal Meldrum Fallowthorn sniffed disdainfully. “Rats! Nevah could abide the rottersnasty, sly, an not a scrap of guts or discipline in any of em!

Bowly stood goggling at the array of decorations jingling and rattling on the Field Marshals tunic. “Gwaw! A real, live warrior. Wot dyew get all those medals for, sir?

Meldrums chest swelled, and he gave Bowly a swift wink. “Battles, young hog, mlad. Thats what a chap earns these gongs for. Thisn was the Eastern Campaign, an the big star here I got for subduin a stoat uprisin. Hah, made those blighters jump I can tell yeh! See these colored bars? Earned em for wallopin weasels up north. This here special silver shield was for biffin the daylights out of a snake, most arrogant adder I ever met, a real boundah! Now, about this golden crescent with a ferret straddlin it ...

The young leveret Runtwold whispered to Mariel and Dandin, “Good ol Uncle Mel. Were his nephews, yknow. He makes all those medals an awards em to himself, but only when he thoroughly earns em. The old fellahs a top-hole warrior an a real toff!

Furpp gestured in the direction of a hill to the west. “Burr, cn oi offer ee guddbeasts summ afreshment, baint much, tho youm be welcumm tmoi dwellin t share et.

Meldrum donned his hat and, pulling his ears through the holes, he signaled his squad into line. “Refreshments! I say, thats rather civil of you, old molechap. Bibntuck-ers me favorite exercise. Lead on!

Furpps dwelling was actually a hill, hollowed out and shored up with rock and timber, dark and cool after the hot noon sun. An entire mole colony lived there. Furpp was obviously the tribal patriarch. He gave them drinking bowls, brimming with a cold cordial of pennycloud and wild barley sweetened with honey. The leveret squadRuntwold, Coltvine, Thurdale, and Foghilldrank deeply, shuffling with anticipation as they watched wood platters being piled high with cold sliced deepernever pie, garnished with hogweed and dandelion salad dressed with crowfoot and garlic mustard. Meldrum the Magnificent shifted huge quantities as he planned his next decoration.

“Hmm, two rats slain an about sixteen vanquished. Lemme see. I think maybe two small silver rats, rampant over a black ribbon with sixteen yellow stripes should fill the bill. Foghill, pour some of that cordial for my chum Bowly.

The young hare saluted casually. “Right ho, Uncle Mel!

The Field Marshals ears shot up stiffly. “Improper form, sah. Youre on a fizzer, young Foghill! I charge you with addressin a superior offisah as uncle. Penalty, polish all me medals before ybunk down tonight! You know the regulations, laddie buck: Im either Sir, or Field Marshal, or Meldrum the Magnificent. Next one I catch callin me Uncle Mel or Nunky, Ill have his ears for breakfast an his tail for tea. That clear, squad? Good, as ywere. Carry on victuallin up!

There were so many moles introduced to the visitors that they soon gave up trying to remember names. The dwelling was very homey, and every comfort was lavished upon them. Furpp invited the rescuers to stay for the night and they gladly accepted, though later Mariel slightly regretted her decision. Every nook and cranny of the dwelling, throughout its various side chambers and alcoves, was packed with multitudes of sleeping moles. They snored and snuffled, sleepwalked, and some of them even argued or sang in their slumbers. The dwelling became oppressively close. Mariel and Dandin, stepping carefully over the sleepers, made their way outside to sleep in the fresh air.