Brian Jacques - The Rogue Crew

Scraping ash from two roasted parsnips, he gave them one apiece. They tasted very good. Uggo looked around at the others within the gorse compound. They were a diverse bunch: squirrels, moles, voles, hedgehogs and various types of mice.

Foober helped herself to a parsnip, winking at the silver-tailed patriarch. “Nobeast kin roast parsnippers like yew, Granpa. Wot are yew starin’ at, Uggo?”

The young hog explained. “Sorry, but I couldn’t help noticin’ yore certainly a mixed bunch.”

Rekaby shrugged. “That’s ’cos we’re the Fortunate Freepaws, y’see. We do no ’arm to anybeast, go where we like an’ do wot we please. Even the Axehound’s Crew leave us be. Good name that, ain’t it, Fortunate Freepaws? I thought it up meself. I like big words—d’you know any?”

Posy scratched her headspikes thoughtfully. “Er, how about curmudgeon , or lackadaisical ?”

Rekaby repeated the words, relishing their sounds. “ Curmudgeon, lackadaisical . . . . I likes them. Wot do they mean?”

Posy explained, “Well, a curmudgeon is a beast who’s moody and sulky. Lackadaisical, I’m not quite sure, but I think it means some creature who is idle and couldn’t care less about things.”

Rekaby scraped off another parsnip, nodding sagely. “Good new words, I’ll remember them. Thankee, Miz Posy.” He gave the parsnip to Wiggle. “So then, ye liddle curmudgeon,’ave yew bin behavin’ yoreself, or ’ave ye bin givin’ pore Foober the runabout?”

Wiggle climbed up on the oldster’s lap, giggling. “Ho, Wiggle gived ’er the runabouts. I’m a real ’mudgeon!”

Rekaby kissed the babe’s soft headspikes fondly. “See that? Ye’ve nearly learned my new word. Go on, now, off with ye an’ torment yore mammy for a while.”

Uggo gained Rekaby’s attention. “Ain’t you worried about the vermin we escaped from? They’ll be comin’ ashore an’ huntin’ for us. There’s a lot of ’em, y’know, an’ they’re pirates an’ murderers.”

The old squirrel laid an earthenware pot in front of Uggo and Posy. “Try dippin’ yore parsnips in this. ’Tis gorseflower honey—we gets it from the bees here.”

Both hedgehogs did as Rekaby suggested, with Posy pursuing Uggo’s enquiry. “Mmm, it tastes quite pleasant, but you haven’t answered my friend’s question, Rekaby.”

The old squirrel gestured with his parsnip. “I think I hear your answer comin’ now. Open the gates for Swiffo, will ye?”

Hooking back the spiny gorse, the two hairy voles admitted a lithe young sea otter. Rekaby called him to the fire. “Now then, ye young curmudgeon, I’ve roasted a parsnip or two for ye. So, what news?”

Swiffo winked at Uggo and Posy as he helped himself to the food. “You two were lucky to escape that ole vermin ship. Ye wouldn’t have made it ’cept for the Whoomers. Hah, I likes Whoomers—they’re good fun!”

Rekaby tweaked Swiffo’s rudder. “Beg y’pardon, but yore supposed t’be reporting t’me, not chattin’ away to them two. Now, tell me all that went on, an’ any good new words ye’ve heard.”

Swiffo took a great gulp from a gourd of pennycloud cordial, then took up the tale.

“Big ship out to sea. Saw our friends here make their dive from it. Great ole green-sailed tub it is, packed with searats an’ corsairs. I thought these two weren’t goin’ t’make the shore, ’specially when somebeast aboard fired a big arrow at ’em. Coloshuss it was, like a pine tree with flights, but it missed ’em. So, next thing the Whoomers comes t’the rescue, puts the ’edgehogs on land, safe’n’sound. Then after slayin’ a few vermin, those Whoomers starts tormentin’ the big ship, haulin’ it to’n’fro, hurlin’ the vermins’ weapons back at ’em. I tell ye, Whoomers knows ’ow to enjoy theirselves!”

Swiffo broke off to dip another parsnip into the honey, but Rekaby chivvied him on.

“So, what happened then—an’ did ye hear any new words?”

The young otter munched away reflectively. “I heard those vermin usin’ lots o’ new words when they was shoutin’ at the Whoomers, but I ain’t about to repeat ’em with maids present. Though there was two— bottlenosed an’ pestilential .’Ow do they sound to ye?”

Rekaby repeated them slowly, then nodded. “Better’n nothin’, I suppose. Well, is that all, ye lackadaisical rip?”

Swiffo licked honey from his paws, winking at the old one. “Oh, no. I was savin’ the best for last. Here’s wot’appened. The Whoomers left off playin’ with the ship an’ went off after a herrin’ shoal. Then a one-eyed uglymugged beast came on deck an’ ordered the ship t’sail for shore.”

Uggo interrupted. “That’ll be Razzid Wearat. He’s the cap’n.”

Swiffo prodded him with a sticky parsnip. “Ahoy, d’ye mind? I’m tellin’ this story. Anyhow, ye’ll never guess wot’appened next!”

Rekaby gave the young otter a long-suffering glance. “No, Swiffo, I’ll never guess what ’appened next, but I’d be pleased to hear it from ye.”

Swiffo covered his mouth, emitting a muffled giggle. “I wouldn’t ’ave believed it if I didn’t see it with me own two eyes, but that ship came sailin’ right up t’the beach, then rolled out o’ the sea an’ along the shore like a big wagon with sails—”

Rekaby’s paw shot up. “Stop right there, young un! The ship came out o’ the sea an’ went along the shore. How?”

Swiffo shrugged. “It’s got wheels, y’see, four of ’em. If’n ye don’t believe me, then go an’ take a look!”

For an old squirrel, Rekaby rose nimbly. “Foober, you an’ Laka gather up the babes! The rest of ye, douse the fire, pack up camp an’ make ready to travel. Uggo, Posy, Swiffo, Fiddy an’ Frudd, come with me!”

Swiffo led the way as the others followed. Posy trotted alongside Fiddy and Frudd, two hairy vole brothers. She could not help noticing they were unarmed.

“Don’t you carry weapons?”

Fiddy shook his head. “None of us Fortunate Freepaw tribe do. We avoid violence an’ offer it to none.”

Leading them along a tortuous path through the dunes, Swiffo came to his former vantage point on a high, reeded sandhill. He pointed upshore triumphantly.

“See for yoreselves!”

16

Mowlag judged the distance between the flat shoreline and the dunetops. “Don’t see ’ow we’ll catch ’em if’n they’ve gone up there, Cap’n.”

Razzid wiped at his weeping eye, answering caustically, “I didn’t think ye would. D’ye recall who got us atop o’ the dunes by the stripedog mountain?”

Jiboree wagged his head admiringly. “That was you, Cap’n!”

The Wearat nodded. “Right, an’ here’s how ye do it. First we find the easiest of these dunes, the smallest. Then ’tis just like steerin’ a ship at sea. Get the wind behind ye, then tack an’ weave from a distance away. Get the crew standin’ by to punt with the oars on both sides. We gets up speed on the flat, then goes full sail at the smallest hill. Soon as we hit it, the crew start helpin’ her up by pushin’ with the oars. Remember now, mudbrain?”

Mowlag tugged his snout meekly. “Aye, Cap’n, ’twas yore idea. Once we’re up, it’s like sailin’ up an’ down the waves.”

Swiffo and the others watched Greenshroud from where they crouched in the dunetop reeds.

Frudd scratched his bushy head. “Wot are they up to? Maybe they’re goin’ back to sea, eh?”

Rekaby, who had been eyeing the vessel keenly, shook his head. “I don’t think so. Look, she’s caught the breeze on the turn to get up a fair lick along the hard sand.”