Gerri Hill - One Summer Night

"She's not Nancy," Betsy stated.

"I know. But I'm just not ready for a relationship right now."

"You must know how it is with her," Janis said.

Jo looked at her and nodded. "Yes, I know."

"She told you?"

Jo shook her head. "She doesn't need to tell me," she said quietly.

Jo thought back to last night and the way that they had made love. No, Kelly didn't need to say the words. She had tried, but Jo had stopped her.

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"I wish you would give her a chance," Betsy said.

"I just can't. I can’t go through that again, Betsy."

"So you spend the rest of your life alone, just so you don't take a chance on getting hurt? Jo, nothing's guaran-teed. Not for any of us. Who's to say that one day Janis won't meet someone who sweeps her off her feet and she up and leaves me?"

"Me?" Janis protested.

"Well, I know there's no one else out there for me,"

Betsy said and smiled lovingly at her.

Janis smiled at her. "Thanks," she said softly.

Jo watched them and was jealous. She wanted what they had and she realized suddenly that she had never had that with Nancy. She thought they had been happy together, but really, had they ever had the close intimacy that Betsy and Janis seemed to share? They had lived two separate lives.

They had their own friends and they rarely mixed the two.

Jo had frequently gone out with Betsy and Janis without Nancy, and Nancy had seldom included Jo when she was out with her friends. How strange it all seemed now. Most of Nancy's friends were from the corporate world, from where she worked. Jo didn't have much in common with them and was secretly pleased that she didn't have to endure too many outings with them. Of course, Nancy had met someone from that world, someone who she had much more in common with than Johanna. And it was easy for her to leave, it seemed. She showed no remorse when she packed her things and moved to New York. Jo was the one left broken. It wasn't so much that Nancy had left her, she realized now. It was that she had felt cheated all those years. It was like they had lived a lie for a long time, and she was saddened to think that if Nancy had not left her, they would still be living 192

together, pretending their relationship was perfect. It saddened her also to think that she would not have met Kelly.

"What I'm trying to say," Betsy started, but Jo cut her off.

"I know what you're trying to say," Jo said. "I just have to work this out in my own way, in my own time."

Betsy nodded. "Okay. Enough of that.”

The doorbell rang, and Jo was spared. Pizza had arrived.

193

Chapter Twenty-Five

Jo had missed Kelly terribly the night before, and she missed her again at lunch today. She looked for her at twelve-thirty and again at one, but she never came. Jo finally picked up the phone and called her office, but she wasn't in.

Her last class was out at noon on Fridays, and Jo assumed she had gone home. She wondered why Kelly was avoiding her.

She hung up, pushed Kelly from her mind and went to work sorting the papers her assistant had graded for her.

After her last class at three, she went to her office, then decided against staying and locked up. It was Friday. Most everyone else had already gone for the weekend.

She met Susan in the hall as she was leaving.

"Johanna. I've been meaning to come see you the last 194

two days, but I've had meetings scheduled nonstop, it seems.

How are you holding up?"

"I'm doing okay, Susan. Thanks. Thanks for all you’ve done."

"Arnie and I were wondering what you were planning for Thanksgiving?" she asked.

"I hadn't really thought about it," she admitted. Jo had always spent the holidays with Harry and Beth, then later, with only Harry. He cooked enough for eight or ten people, even when it was only the two of them. They then would spend the next week eating turkey and wouldn't crave it again until the next year. Last year, he had invited Betsy and Janis, and after stuffing themselves, they had sat around watching football the rest of the day.

"Well, we would love for you to join us. David and Sarah will both be here this year," she said, referring to their two grown children.

"I appreciate the offer, Susan. I'll let you know," she replied, but she knew she wouldn't go. If she did anything for Thanksgiving, she would spend it with Betsy and Janis.

Or Kelly, she added.

"Well, think about it. I know you have friends here that will probably invite you, too, but we would love for you to spend it with our family."

"Thank you. And thank Arnie for me, too."

She drove home slowly, not in a hurry to rush the weekend. She would have to go to Harry's house tomorrow and start cleaning and sorting through his things. The reminder of Thanksgiving brought on a rush of sadness. It would be hard not having Harry with her through the holidays this year. Especially Christmas, she thought.

Her house was quiet and empty. She changed into sweatpants and cursed herself for not going grocery shopping. She had two beers in the refrigerator. She opened one 195

and sat in the living room, watching a light rain fall on the deck. Winter was showing itself this evening, and they were expecting their first frost of the season. She looked at her potted plants dripping in the cold rain and got up to bring them inside. These three were the only ones still alive after the hot summer. It was probably best that Arnie had not given her any more plants.

She sat back on the sofa, grabbed the remote and flipped through the channels, finding nothing to interest her. She switched off the TV and sighed. Why hadn't Kelly called her? Why hadn't she come by to see her? Was she waiting for Jo to call her?

Johanna looked at the phone for a moment, then picked it up and punched out her number.

Kelly answered on the second ring.

"What are you doing?" Jo asked.

"Just sitting here," she replied.

"Me, too."

Kelly said nothing, so Jo continued. "I missed you today," she confessed.

"I missed you, too.”

"Would you like to have dinner . . . or something?" Jo asked.

There was silence for a moment and Jo pictured her smiling over the “or something.”

"I could pick up Chinese and come over, if you'd like,"

Kelly offered.

"I'd like that.”

"Good. What kind do you want?"

"Anything with chicken. And an eggroll."

"Coming right up. I'll see you soon.”

Jo put down the phone and smiled. She could always count on Kelly for being there for her. She went out on the 196

deck, sorted through her firewood from last year, and found several logs against the house that were not yet wet.

By the time Kelly got there, she had the fire going, warming the house. She opened the door to Kelly, who was soaking wet.

"God, look at you. Come in," Jo said quickly and took the bag from her. "Ever heard of an umbrella?"

"Didn't have enough hands.” Kelly laughed and held up the bottle of wine.

Jo met her eyes and smiled. God, she had missed her.

Kelly held her gaze and smiled back. Jo finally looked away and went into the kitchen, and Kelly followed.

Jo sat the bag on the counter, took plates down and grabbed a couple of forks, all the while conscious of Kelly watching her. She reached into the cabinet and found two wine glasses, setting them beside the plates. Finally, Jo turned around and faced her.

"The cork screw is in there," she said, pointing to a drawer. She turned back to the plates and began dishing out the rice, chicken and vegetables Kelly had brought.

The cork popped and Kelly reached around her for the glasses, their arms brushing. Jo ignored the thrill that shot through her and put eggrolls on each of their plates before carrying them to the table. Kelly followed with the wine and forks.