Andrus Kivirähk - The Man Who Spoke Snakish

“Well, that’s what they said!”

“They did, the beasts! I’m not an old hag yet! I told them, too, I said, ‘You, Ülgas, you look like a corpse walking on two legs; you’re a fine one to be calling somebody old! And you, Tambet, you’re no longer young either and you don’t look too good, your hair all gray!’ Ah, but now he’s dead? You see, and there he was, calling me an old hag!”

“Mother, that’s not important!” interrupted Salme. “Anyway, then they started to leave …”

“Wait! Let me tell it!” said Mother. “They didn’t start leaving so quickly; they stood around for a while demanding to know: where did you go, where did you go? Let’s tell it as it actually was, Salme! You’d be better off going to see if the goat’s ready!”

Salme went to the inglenook, offended, while Mother carried on with her story.

“Well now, where was I? Yes, they stood asking questions. I said how would I know where you went? You didn’t say a word to me about a plan to go somewhere with Hiie; I guessed that you’d bring Hiie to us and make her your wife. Of course Tambet went blue in the face when he heard this, but I wasn’t afraid of him. I said straight out: ‘I see that my son did the right thing. That he’s a wise and good man, for if he’d brought Hiie home, he’d have had to fight you, and what kind of a life is it if you have murderers lurking around the house all the time, wanting to strike down your wife.’ And I went on: ‘Even if I knew where he and Hiie went, I wouldn’t say a word to you about it! And now get lost, because my son-in-law will be home soon, and if you upset me any more, he’ll bash you up!’ “

“And then Mõmmi did come,” sighed Salme, who was now carrying the cooked goat to the table.

“He did come, yes, and I said, ‘Look, if you please, here’s my son-in-law. Now clear off!’ And imagine the scene: Tambet pushed Mõmmi, so that Mõmmi fell on his backside into the fireplace and burned his bottom. Mõmmi, show Leemet and Hiie where you got hurt!”

“No problem, I’m getting better,” muttered the bear from his bed and turned on his side, so that we could see the singed fur on his lower half.

“Aren’t they cruel people!” sighed Mother. “Poor bear! Well, how can a person be so wicked as to push a living animal into the fire? I’d have quite happily stabbed them in the back with a knife, but there was no time. Mõmmi was yelling in the fireplace and I had to help. At that moment those scoundrels took off, and I haven’t seen any more of them. Isn’t it terrible what we’ve all had to go through? I tell you there are few people left in the forest, but half of them are crazy.”

“Mõmmi, can you manage to come to the table?” Salme asked her husband, stroking the bear’s head tenderly.

“I might be able to get to the table,” answered the bear. “But I couldn’t sit down. Leave it. You eat; I’ll just rest.”

“I won’t hear of it!” said Mother. “You have to eat; otherwise you won’t get better. We’ll bring the meat to your bed and lift the table over beside you, so you won’t feel alone. Leemet and Salme, drag the table over to Mõmmi’s bed; today we’ll eat there.”

It took a while before we got the table into the right position, and then we had to find a suitable piece of meat for the sick Mõmmi and get him into a position where he could eat comfortably. Only then could we sit down at the table, and Mother looked at us in amazement.

“Why don’t you say anything? We’re waiting! We want to know where you’ve been all these days and how you got away from the disgusting sage!”

“And how did your father die, Hiie?” added Salme.

“Your grandfather killed him,” replied Hiie.

“My grandfather?” Salme repeated. “I don’t have a grandfather.”

I put one skull beaker on the table and shifted it in front of Mother.

“This is from your father,” I said. “He sends his greetings and said he’ll come visiting soon.”

“My father …” whispered Mother, looking at me with hazy eyes. “He’s dead. They threw him in the sea.”

“Oh no, he’s very much alive,” said Hiie. “He doesn’t have legs, but he’s built wings for himself and soon he’ll be flying to us with them.”

Mother stared at the skull chalice.

“I remember I had one of these as a child,” she murmured. “Father made it for me. I drank warm milk from it. It was my favorite cup.”

She kissed the beaker, pressed it against her cheek, and began crying quietly.

“Children, you don’t know what this means,” she whispered through her sobs. “To find your own father, and at my age. I thought he was dead long ago … But you say he’s coming back home. I feel like a little girl again. I was quite small then … Children, this is a miracle. Don’t worry that I’m crying like this, but I really … I just can’t …”

She kissed her beaker once more, and her tears dropped into it.

“A shame that Vootele didn’t see this day,” she said. “He was always very proud of our father. He was older, and remembered him better. Children, this is the most wonderful day of my life.”

“Mother, Grandfather hasn’t come home yet,” I said. “This is only a beaker made by him that you’re clutching. Wait until he arrives himself!”

“No, no,” sobbed Mother. “This cup is just as dear to me. It reminds me of my childhood. But now tell me everything! How did you meet my father? Where does he live?”

Hiie and I started competing with each other in retelling our adventures. Mother listened and interrupted only to occasionally shout, “Eat up! You’re not eating at all! But tell me what happened next?” So we had to gobble a piece of roast without chewing it and carry on talking. Salme sat beside Mõmmi on the bed, stroking her bear and continually passing him more bones, which he gnawed slowly but surely clean. His bottom was indeed singed, but his appetite was unchanged. Gradually the evening was rolling in. All the stories had been told. We had loaded onto the table all the remaining skull cups, and Mother’s rapture knew no bounds. She arranged the crania in a row and stroked them delicately.

“Father is quite a master! Perhaps he’ll teach you, Leemet, this art of making drinking bowls. That would be nice.”

“So what do you plan to do from now on?” asked Salme.

“We’re thinking of getting married,” I replied, taking Hiie by the waist.

“That’s so lovely to hear,” smiled Mother. “Let’s hope that Grandfather will get to your wedding.”

“I think we won’t wait for him,” I said. Something within me told me that perhaps it would be wiser to hold the wedding before Grandfather’s arrival, since Grandfather would naturally say that women can wait, and would take me off to war. Although I had nothing against fighting together with Grandfather, I wanted at least to enjoy a few days of quiet peaceful family life before that.

“We’ll get married as quickly as possible,” I announced.

Mõmmi nodded from his bed.

“If I had such a beautiful bride, I would do exactly the same,” he said, eyeing Hiie lovingly.

“How’s your bottom?” shouted Salme, annoyed, shoving the bear painfully with her elbow.

“Hurts,” sighed the bear, turning his amber-colored eyes obediently toward Salme.

e slept in our shack, but the next morning Hiie wanted to visit her mother, and naturally I went with her. It was actually Mall who had saved our lives, and we hadn’t properly thanked her for it. We also had to bear her the news of Tambet’s death. Mother fed our bellies full to bursting and warned us about wolves wandering in the forest.