Alex Preston - The Revelations

‘No, I don’t mind reading them. There are places where I think they’re spot on. Some of the rituals around faith are outmoded and ridiculous. Some of the more literal interpretations of the Bible are daft. But they use those examples to reject everything about Christianity. And that’s as idiotic as the people they’re trying to discredit. What I find most interesting, though, is that sometimes I feel these atheists have a closer relationship with the God they say they hate than a lot of believers. It takes a lot of heart to really hate someone.’

Marcus turned to face her and she placed a long kiss on his lips, slipping her tongue into his mouth. They both kept their eyes open and he could see thoughts moving through her mind like eels at the bottom of a pool. She drew away and smiled down at him.

‘It’s only recently that the big minds have been on the side of the enemy. You just have to read Milton or Bunyan or C. S. Lewis and they provide everything you need to defend against these books. They’re a fad, a way for these vain old men to pay for dental work, ensure that they have beautiful coffins to house them for their disenchanted eternities.’

Marcus liked it when Abby got angry. Her cheeks flushed bullfinch red and she breathed very quickly, her face creasing into a frown of concentration. Her anger always passed swiftly; now her face was once again centred upon her wide smile. Rain began to spot on the windows. Marcus could see it streaming down from the clouds over the woods.

‘I feel a bit sick,’ Abby said.

‘I’m really nervous, too.’ He took her hand.

‘I just feel like there’s so much pressure on us. I really want David to be proud of us. I want him to feel like the Retreat has been a success.’

Marcus was quiet for a moment.

‘It’s different for you, I think. Because you work for the Course. I worry about some of the ways we keep people attending. Sometimes I think the Course should live and die on its own merits. Poor Maki clearly isn’t feeling comfortable, but I think we’ve almost persuaded her to stick it out.’

‘If people stay for long enough, they’re converted. You know that. The Course just needs time to do its work, and if we have to be a little disingenuous in order to buy that time, I can live with that. Maki will end up thanking us for it. Sometimes you have to commit a few small sins to achieve something as good and holy as conversion to the Course.’

‘You’re right. I know you are. But you can see why it makes me uncomfortable.’

Abby smiled distantly at him and rose from the bed. ‘We should go downstairs,’ she said. ‘It’s time for tea.’

Marcus knocked on Lee’s door on the way down. She answered it wearing a black blouse that clung tightly to her ribs; the sleeves were fitted around her thin arms and the décolletage dived low, showing a thin strip of mauve bra. She was still in her pants, and turned away from Marcus to pull on a new skirt. While Abby waited in the hallway outside, he watched Lee bend to tug the skirt up over her spindly legs. He imagined stepping behind her, pressing himself against her thin body, feeling the flimsy delicacy of her. She looked quizzically over her shoulder at him, thrust her feet into a pair of white trainers and shut the door behind her.

They ate tea in the hall as the rain roared down around them. Mrs Millman brought out plates of buttered scones. The twins toasted marshmallows by the fire and dropped them into mugs of hot chocolate which they passed around the other Course members. Neil had changed into a blue blazer with nautical gold buttons which he polished absent-mindedly with his handkerchief as he listened to David and the Earl, who were sitting in armchairs by the fire. The Earl was speaking loudly about a mine he had invested in after a tip-off from a priest.

‘He’s out at the Anglican mission in Baku. Does a service every now and then for BP executives and their wives, but mainly he’s quietly lining his own pockets. Tipped me off about this uranium find a couple of years back and it has been quite spectacular. .’

Philip and Maki chatted quietly in a corner. When the scones had disappeared, a comfortable lull fell over the group. Marcus lolled in an armchair in one corner with Abby perched on the arm; Mouse, with his nose pressed against the window, watched the rain fall in the darkness outside; Lee sat at his side, her hand on his back. After a few minutes, David rose from his chair, stood next to the fire and spoke, his white shirt very bright above khaki chinos.

‘It’s time for me to go down and prepare for this evening’s service. This is the centrepiece of the Retreat, the heart of the whole Course, really. You guys should make your way down when you feel ready. It is a good idea to sit down there and prepare yourselves to speak to God before we begin. We’ll be playing some gentle music to help get you in the mood before we start the service proper at six. I’ll be praying for all of you. Good luck and God bless.’

He strode towards the doors, flung them open and stepped out into the darkness and the rain. The Earl followed him into the deluge and Marcus watched them scurry down to the chapel. He stood up, took Abby by the hand and led her outside. Mouse and Lee followed, with Mouse’s velvet jacket tented above them. Inside the chapel it was very dark. Marcus and Abby still held hands. Someone flicked a switch and a spotlight cut along the aisle, exploding onto the backcloth behind the altar. David stepped into the circle of light. Marcus followed the beam to its source and saw the Earl perched behind a lighting desk in the shadows at the back of the chapel, his fingers moving swiftly over the controls. The beam falling on David faded imperceptibly, until there was only a golden aura surrounding him. Then another spotlight shone onto the stage to the left of the altar, and the four friends walked together down the aisle and took up their positions. Marcus picked up his bass guitar, Mouse sat behind the drum kit, Abby sat on the edge of the stage swinging her legs. Lee started to play the ‘Promenade’ from Pictures at an Exhibition , imbuing the music with great sadness. Finally, the priest stepped up to join them, and picked out a series of minor chords on the guitar which he strapped around his neck.

Marcus saw the Course members coming into the chapel in twos and threes, picking their way self-consciously down the aisle. Neil and the twins were first, then Philip and Maki, then a cluster of younger girls from his group, followed by their boyfriends. Finally, Sally and Mrs Millman entered, shaking the water from their umbrellas. The members sat in the pews at the front of the chapel, again holding candles that the Earl had handed to them on the way in.

Abby hummed quietly, her eyes shut, her feet still swinging. Marcus turned his bass down until it was scarcely audible. Mouse circled his brushes over the snare so that the noise from the drum was barely distinguishable from the sound of the rain falling on the chapel roof. The Earl was back behind the lighting desk and he brought the spot up very slowly so that the group on the stage seemed to be at the centre of the room. The music rose gradually and Abby climbed to her feet, stretching her arms upwards as she began to sing.

‘We can never know You,

Until we know ourselves,

And we’ll never find ourselves

Until we find You, Lord.’

Mouse had picked up his drumsticks and began to crash out a driving military beat. Marcus turned up his volume switch and, moving into the middle of the stage, David played a series of explosive power chords. The rest of the Course members joined in with the song’s chorus, the mix of voices swirling around the small church.

‘All shall be well,

And all shall be well,