Santiago Gamboa - Night Prayers

To me it seemed incredible that anybody could think the National belonged to the guerrillas, when from inside the truth was quite different. Most of the students were middle-class or working-class, that’s what everybody thought was strange. That the poor should have somewhere to study, that the best university in the country should be for them. That’s why they want to see it closed down and the land used for something profitable, like a shopping mall, with a theme park and a hotel attached, that’s what some people want, and that’s why they dream of seeing it closed down and its students in mass graves. It makes them angry that poor people should have opportunities, that there are good teachers and a high budget, their mouths water thinking of those millions that could be used on contracts or on buying guns and helicopters to defend the Fatherland, but which are actually spent on books and on equipping laboratories, no, the rich don’t like that because, to them, sending their children to university, at Los Andes or abroad, costs them a lot, and that’s why they feel defrauded, what’s this about giving the best to the poor? what’s the big deal, then, in being rich? They say their taxes keep the country going, but you know that isn’t true. Those who keep the country going are the poor and the middle class, who really do pay taxes. That’s why Colombia is a poor and middle-class country. Anyway, Consul, why should I tell you what you already know?

I went around with my group of friends, and in addition there were Brigitte and Lady, who had helped me get involved in that life. Once I met them in one of the open areas in Fine Arts and they asked me about the friends I’d made in the bar, and I told them, very good, excellent contact, thanks, I didn’t want to tell them that I was already flying higher, and why, and at that point I got another call from the former Miss Colombia, asking me to her office.

I have something very good for you, she said, not for now, but I’d like you to think it over and let me know, and I said, why all the mystery? I told her I’d really liked Señor Alfredo, that I’d go back whenever he called me, but the former Miss Colombia said, what I’m offering you is much better, it means getting on a plane and going to Japan to work for six months, a year maximum; you’ll be in a beautiful residence, with everything thrown in: lodging, food, light and heating, everything. You’ll be working with Japanese people, who are timid, clean, and very polite, and in a year you’ll be able to earn several hundred thousand dollars, clear, they pay high-class women like you very well there, it’s a great opportunity that I don’t offer everyone, anyway, think it over for a few days and call me, as soon as you decide you can go, we have a free place.

I walked out, lost in thought. Japan? a hundred thousand dollars? That’s what I’d been hoping to get to take Manuel away, but it wasn’t going to be easy to justify such a long time to my parents; I’d have to tell them I’d won a scholarship or something like that, it was complicated, too many lies and false papers. The thing sounded good but scared me a little. It had its pros and cons. I thought I’d be able to see how life was in Japan and later fetch Manuel so that he could study Japanese and learn to make films, like Kitano and Kurosawa and Ozu, there are bound to be good universities there, I told myself, but the problem was always the same, how to explain to him what I was doing? Just thinking about it made me dizzy, as if I was having to strip off and open my legs in the middle of a square, while everyone looked at me coldly and menacingly, no, to him I was virtue, I couldn’t show him my other side, even though the goal was to save him, or to save the two of us. That was why when he started studying philosophy at the National I stopped him from meeting my friends, it made me nervous to think that for any reason he could meet Lady or Brigitte and find out, it made me panic. How could I be with him in Japan without telling him? It was difficult, but a good opportunity. I would keep it in mind and see if anything happened that would help me decide, or if anything better came along. And there was also the other thing: the promise I made myself and which, in a way, I made to Monsieur Echenoz. His memory was still very much alive inside me.

This is where the story starts moving faster, Consul, because the next thing that happened, sometime later, was that Andrés Felipe called me one afternoon, sounding very nervous, and said, I have to see you, precious, all right? go to room 507 of the Hotel Charleston, I’m registered under the name Boris Salcedo, can you come now? When I got there, he was a bundle of nerves: they were accusing him of having links with the paramilitaries, because in a joint operation of the police and the Secret Service one of Don Fermín’s people had been arrested with a computer on which his name appeared, as a contact, and the press already had hold of it, you remember Don Fermín, the one with the ranch in Antioquia? He said that going to that fucking house had been a mistake, that he’d been following orders, that not only the press was on to it but also the prosecutor’s department, that in addition Don Fermín had given them three days to solve the problem or he’d start to talk, and the president was nervous; the advisers had told him that the best thing to do was burn him, me! Andrés Felipe cried, doing a line of coke, can you imagine? what my colleagues are suggesting is to throw me to the wolves, the sons of bitches, saying that I met with Don Fermín of my own accord to get money, they tell me the government will stand by me to protect me, and my family, but I have to declare that I went of my own accord, can you imagine? it could mean ten or more years in prison and the end of my career, what am I going to do afterwards? what’s going to happen to my wife and children? that’s why I wanted to talk to you, precious, I’m going to refuse to make a statement, I’m going to defend myself, but since you came with me it’s likely they’re going to look for you, they’re going to ask you to inform on me, they’re going to offer you things or maybe even threaten you, I don’t know, that’s why I want you to leave the country for a while, if you need money I’ll give it to you, and I said to him, well, of course, Andrés Felipe, of course I need it, and he said, look, in that case I have ten thousand dollars, take it but go somewhere else, now, today, and then I asked him, and what did I do wrong? and he said, nothing, but you were there, precious, nothing’s going to happen to you, it’s just in case they look for you and question you, but if anything bad happens to me, then I want you to remember that when we got back in the helicopter that night, I went directly to the Palace to report on the meeting, do you remember that? and I said, yes, of course, you left me in a taxi, and he said, perfect, the best thing is not to have to say anything at all, but if you do you can’t forget how it was, right? go somewhere, wait for the heat to die down.

He gave me a hug, did two lines of coke, and I asked him, have you already gone into hiding or what? and he said, no, what’s happening is that I can’t make appointments anywhere, I don’t know what to do, I thought to make a statement to the press from here, my lawyer is coming to talk with me later and then we’ll decide, but I wanted to sort things out with you first, did you tell anyone on Don Fermín’s ranch your name? and I said, no, not as far as I remember, and he said, thank God for that, that means it’ll be harder for them to locate you, well, precious, good luck and don’t contact me by cell phone, delete my number and all my calls, okay?

I left feeling nervous and making calculations, what might happen to me? I assumed that Víctor might help, after all he was in the Secret Service, so I sent him a letter, which was the only way, and wrote to him, what’s up, stranger? It worked, and the next day he called me, hi, princess, shall I send someone to pick you up? I said yes, I’ll be at the Metro Riviera, and when he saw me he said, the thing is, the heat’s on right now, I think Piedrahita is going to be out on the street all week, they’re really nervous upstairs, I stole a little moment to see you, princess, but I’m going to have to work later, I’m on a stakeout, and I licked his neck and said, don’t scare me, Víctor, who are you following that’s so dangerous? and he said, no, he isn’t dangerous, he’s a white-collar son of a bitch the chief wants to turn, that’s what they told me, we have to keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid, and of course, that got me worried, a white-collar son of a bitch? it had to be Andrés Felipe, and if they’re following him they must surely have seen me going in to the Charleston and even heard what we were talking about, but it struck me as strange that Víctor should be so calm with me, so I didn’t say anything more and concentrated on what I was doing, a classic fuck, and when we’d finished and he was taking a shower I saw his cell phone vibrate several times, so I stretched over to see the screen and two capital C’s flickered on it, CC, just that, once and once again. He dressed quickly, gave me a roll of dollars, and we did a couple of lines of coke; then he saw his phone and said, hey, wait, princess, this is urgent, and dialed and I heard him say, yes, yes, oh, fuck, seriously? okay, wait for me there, have you got everything recorded? no? good, I don’t give a damn about them, and he said to me, I have to rush, princess, we need to look for a girl who talked with the man, oh, God, this is starting to smell fishy, how many times have I told you, this country is full of bad people.