Nicole Dennis-Benn - Here Comes the Sun

“What color is di sky now?”

Thandi jumps when she hears his voice. She wonders if she’s imagining it. But when she blinks, he’s still there. She leaps up from the boat and into his arms, breathing in the familiar pawpaw musk mixed with smells of weed and sweat. His face is pressed into her neck. And Thandi thinks she feels something warm and wet. When she pulls back, she wipes his face with her fingers. “If yuh t’ink it blue, look again,” he says. But Thandi is not interested in looking anywhere but at him. She flings her arms around his neck and kisses him. Charles climbs into the boat and they lie together between the seats.

“Yuh came out here to look fah me?” Charles asks.

“I missed you. They’re looking for you everywhere.”

“I leave for Kingston in a couple days. I’m only here to say goodbye to all this.” He inhales deeply as if to take in all the air.

“Who yuh staying wid now?”

“Jullette.”

“Jus’ be careful.”

“I didn’t mean fi kill him.”

“We don’t really know if is you cause it. It could be anything. Don’t be so hard on yuhself.”

He cups her chin. “It was my fault. I’ll accept di responsibility.”

“I want to come with you.”

“Yuh can’t come wid me.”

“How will we stay in touch?”

“I will find a way.”

Thandi relaxes into him. She meets his passion with equal fervor, allowing this heat to take over, spread throughout her limbs, her core. The night forms a protective cloak around them. Their bodies move inside the boat like seals trapped inside a net, fighting to free themselves. The agony, the terror, the surrender.

Charles helps her out of the boat. He kisses her one last time before he departs. Thandi holds on to his hand. “I want to come with you,” she says again.

“Not now. I’ll let you know when. Right now it’s not safe.”

“What about Miss Violet?”

“Jullette will tek care of her. She moving wid har to St. Elizabeth.”

Thandi wonders if he knows what Jullette does to make money. That moving out of Montego Bay wouldn’t be good for the type of business she does.

She grips his arms. “Jus’ take care of yuhself.”

He kisses her goodbye and leaves her to the sound of the waves crashing.

MARGOT LEANS BACK IN HER NEW OFFICE. SHE KICKS OFF HER shoes and inhales. Through the partially open louver windows on her left she can see into the hotel lobby, though no one can see her. Right behind her are the beachfront suites where visitors lie flat on their backs and bellies in the bright sun while maids dash in and out of rooms with mops and linens. The walls in the office are decorated with accolades the hotel has won over the years, most of which were acquired during Reginald Senior’s tenure. She’s in charge in the interim as Alphonso still scrambles to replace Miss Novia Scott-Henry. It’s up to her to prove she can do the job, which will also give her practice for the new hotel. She runs her hands along the wide mahogany table where all the paperwork sits in an orderly fashion, stacked and awaiting her signature. Pens and pencils are kept inside a steel cylindrical holder. Important folders are stacked solemnly inside a drawer at her feet. Margot brings her cheek to the surface of the table.

She breathes, carefully exhaling into the open room, afraid to disturb the silence. Her lipstick leaves a mark that she quickly wipes clean. She swirls around in her adjustable chair a few times, glad that no one can see her. Happiness feels like an office with good air-conditioning, a chair that adjusts to her back as though it is made for her, a mahogany desk with her name on it, a better view of the beach, the ability to slip out of her shoes and wiggle her toes, and a door she can keep locked. She can’t believe that Miss Novia Scott-Henry had all this to herself yet chose to leave the door wide open. Margot will only respond to visitors who call in first through Kensington.

So when Sweetness barges in unannounced, Margot nearly falls out of her chair. She scrambles to slide her feet back inside her shoes and sit up straight. “Who let you in?” Margot asks the girl.

“It doesn’t mattah now. Yuh secretary out there reading har Bible.”

Margot fights the urge to ask the girl to retrace her steps so that she can be announced the right way, but stops herself. Sweetness’s eyes are red. Margot hasn’t seen or heard from her since last week. There were clients who refused to be paired with other girls when Margot told them that Sweetness was unavailable. She has become a client favorite. Margot should be furious with this unannounced visit; but she has never been so happy to see the girl. Though Sweetness looks disheveled, like she has not washed in days. Her hair is matted on her head and she wears no makeup to hide the blemishes on her cheeks. Her blouse and skirt are mismatched, as if she got dressed in the dark.

Margot leans back in her chair and clasps her hands in front of her.

“Yuh look like Satan drag yuh through hell,” Margot says to the girl. “Please sit.”

“Is okay, ah won’t be long,” Sweetness says.

“We’ve been losing money because of you,” Margot says. “This meeting won’t be determined by you. Sit.”

“I’m sorry,” Sweetness says, still standing.

“Sorry?” Margot looks up at her. “Yuh know how much money we coulda mek dis week alone if you were here? ’Membah we have more responsibilities now”

“I know.”

“So what’s yuh excuse?”

“Excuse?”

“Why haven’t you been to work?”

“Work?”

“Sweetness, what’s di mattah wid yuh?”

“I can’t do dis anymore.”

“What?”

Margot gets up from her chair.

“I can’t work fah yuh no more, boss lady.”

For the first time since the business started, Margot has never felt so dependent on a girl. Like the men that Sweetness leaves begging for more, Margot is tempted to throw money at the girl. She would throw herself if she has to. What will she do without Sweetness? “What yuh mean, yuh don’t want to work anymore? Why?”

“Ah have to go, boss lady,” Sweetness says, holding her head down and clutching the raggedy leather purse on her shoulder. “Ah not coming back.” She heads toward the door.

“Sweetness!”

The girl stops. Margot hurries around the desk toward her. The girl stands still, trembling. Margot cups her chin. “You know I care about you. You know I’ll do anyt’ing for you.” She draws her face close to Sweetness, who closes her eyes and parts her lips, her sweet, eager breath hot on Margot’s face. She exhales slowly through her mouth, which Margot grazes with her own. “Jus’ stay wid me till the end,” Margot whispers. “You’re my number one girl.”

She strokes Sweetness’s arm. But Sweetness pulls away.

“Yuh only care ’bout dat other hotel. You don’t care ’bout me. If yuh did care, you woulda tell Alphonso to call off di reward or I will—”

“You know di reason why I had to,” Margot says, cutting her off. “Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

“Unlike you, is blood dat pump through me vein. Not greed.”

“Sweetness!” Margot reaches for her arm again.

“Nuh touch me! Either yuh tell Alphonso to change him mind, or I will mek sure to let him know how yuh scheme fi get dis office.”

Margot folds her arms across her chest. “Yuh t’ink because yuh give good pussy dat you have a voice? Dat yuh is worthy of an opinion? Yuh is nothing but a tar-black country girl wid not even a high school education. A girl wid nothing going for her but har long legs an’ big behind. Yuh t’ink anyone want to hear what yuh have to say? You’ll never talk to di Alphonsos of dis world without being laughed at. To them, you’re a servant. And will always be a servant.”