Xu Xiaobin - Dunhuang Dream

She had learned about the Dharani of the Future Life from her grandmother and could even recite a few lines of it. The sacred Dharani of the Future Life was the magic spell used as the last resort for anyone on death’s door. If her grandmother knew what she thought, she’d turn over in her grave.

But the Dharani was very effective. By the time she had repeated it sixty times, she could detect that the clouds had lost some of their inky darkness and were growing light around the edges. She could almost see a golden light streaming through the lowering clouds. She recalled the story her grandmother had told of the opening of Heaven’s door. Once each year, the Buddha shows himself, usually on a day in the seventh lunar month. Or it was in the middle of the seventh month now. .

The Buddha rode in a golden chariot. To his left was Samantabhadra and to his right was Maitreya. Why did the Buddha and the Apollo both ride in golden chariots? But Apollo was unaccompanied, perhaps because it was easier for him to pursue whatever goddess had taken his fancy. In what way did the Buddha appear? In his spiritual body, in his body of bliss, or in his body of incarnation?

It is said that in ages past, the Buddha never appeared. His features could not be fixed, because, according to the early Buddhism, he had transcended human form. During the time of King Asoka in India, just a few men showed their desire to become monks by worshiping the Buddha’s footprints. When the Buddha began to be represented in art, it was symbolically through visual metaphors of the Wheel of the Law, a throne, or the Bodhi tree.

The actual image of the Buddha appeared only during the Gandhara period. 1

She felt that beginning then, the Buddha had lost legitimacy. When she thought of the Buddha now, she would rather think of him as a Bodhi tree, a lotus flower, even a sea or even imagine him as a pure and innocent newborn baby.

3

Later a friendly voice was heard in the darkness.

A black car pulled up silently alongside her. She remembered the car and a shiver still ran down her back as if a cold, black beetle crawled there. The feeling was soon displaced by the friendly voice. A woman stuck her head out, and in the light reflected from the headlights, Xingxing could see the kind, broad face and the not altogether bad-looking double chin. The eyes were long and narrow and the eyebrows sparse. She couldn’t clearly make out her expression, but she felt the face was restrained and dignified, as if Guanyin herself had appeared in the flesh.

“Where are you going?”

It must have been the third time the woman asked. Xingxing stepped over to the car window without taking the distance into account and suddenly found herself within inches of the woman. She felt ashamed but did not show it and stepped back a bit, but the woman laughed without concern.

“I. . I’m going back to the Sanwei Mountain Guesthouse,” she replied, nearly whispering in the woman’s ear. It was then that she noticed the stately dignity in the woman’s eyes.

The car door opened and she stepped in. She saw that there was another man in the car in addition to the driver. He sat with his back to her, looking out the window. From behind, he looked extremely familiar, but she couldn’t place him.

“The Sanwei Mountain Guesthouse,” the woman softly ordered in a nasal tone. She felt that the woman had a very nasal tone of voice, but no one else, not even Wuye would notice. This was a key difference in the way they observed people.

The black car sped silently toward the Sanwei Guesthouse. The man in the front seat seemed to be snoring softly. Xingxing parted the curtains in the car and saw that the thick clouds around Sanwei Mountain were still tinted red. Was it morning or evening? She couldn’t resist looking at this disciple of Buddha who seemed to be looking at her. Their eyes met, so she had to say something.

“Thank you. . thank you so much.”

Lips parted in a smile, she shook her head as if she meant to say that something so insignificant wasn’t worth mentioning. Her style only strengthened her impression that she was dealing with a person of importance. Therefore, she simply made small talk and began asking some innocent questions.

“What should I call you?”

The disciple of Buddha continued smiling without saying a word. She noticed that she was wearing a silver-gray coat under which she could see the striped collar of her clothes. She looked at the folds on her neck and was certain she was in her fifties, but she only had a few very faint crow’s feet on her face, and she was whiter complexioned than most people. Her cheeks were pink as if they had been rouged, and her long narrow eyes were watery and appeared sympathetic, though they did contain a certain dignity.

“What. . what do you do?” continued Xingxing.

The woman had her completely confused.

The disciple of Buddha glanced at Xingxing and smiled again as if she were not planning on answering any questions. The car arrived at the foot of Sanwei Mountain. Xingxing seemed to awaken; she thought of Wuye and of that frightening scene that had just occurred. Was the woman in front of her really Great Merciful Guanyin come to save her from her troubles? She could not let her go.

“Noble lady,” she said to the woman.

The woman looked at her somewhat amazed.

“Noble lady,” she insisted. “Since you don’t want to reveal your name, let me call you Bodhisattva. You really look like the Bodhisattva Guanyin.”

Her smile frozen on her lips, she looked at Xingxing without flinching.

“Bodhisattva, I’m sure you can help me. She placed special emphasis on the word can . She became extremely excited, but the woman maintained her indifferent gaze.

“I have a good friend. . a young man. . today we went to look at the Tantric Caves, but. . but. .” She began to stammer. “But he was taken away by a group of people. Tell me what do you think I should do?”

The bodhisattva’s thin, sparse eyebrows twitched. Then she spoke slowly and evenly in her nasal voice that Xingxing found so touching. She asked about everything that had happened as well as about Xiang Wuye and his kidnapping.

“Can. . can you help me?” she pleaded. She could see that even if the woman before her was not Guanyin, she still could play a decisive role, that she was someone who had immense power in the area. “If not, then I’ll just have to report a crime.”

“Don’t worry. Your friend will be well treated. .” The bodhisattva frowned and lowered her head. “In any event, there is no need to report a crime — that would only make matters worse. Okay, here is the guesthouse. See you later.”

Xiao Xingxing watched as the black car sped off silently into the darkness. Just as the car was on the point of being swallowed by the darkness, she saw the man sleeping in front raise his head. It was Dayejisi! She wanted to shout. The neon clouds around Sanwei Mountain had already vanished, or perhaps she had been hallucinating.

4

Zhang Shu was startled by Yu’er’s outward passion and her inward cool.

She came often. But it was always as if it were to hold a ceremony. She always arrived splendidly dressed and smelling just bathed. She lit a burner full of ambergris incense and amid the heady, stupefying smoke she calmly and unhurriedly undressed, as deliberately as if she were working out some difficult mathematical equation. She began to move methodically. Her brownish hair hung down, covering her body. Amid her luxurious hair, he felt he had stepped into a bright golden palace in which a female Buddha was opening her red lips toward him.

Amid those insatiably repeated movements, he realized that this woman with cold fingers didn’t really love him. Men are not always as stupid as women think. Yes, the moment Zhang Shu realized that she didn’t love him, he began to take an interest in her.